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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Finding it funny my husband is finding it difficult to do what I do everyday

40 replies

Jordan4531 · 06/05/2018 10:11

I'm currently upstairs getting ready for a wedding we are invited to, I can hear my husband desperately trying to stop my two year old get her paints out while trying to clean up. I get told it's not that hard look g after the kids while he's at work, well he sounds like he's finding it quite hard right now. I'm going to enjoy the peace and give myself a wicked blow dry Grin

OP posts:
fcekinghell · 06/05/2018 12:08

It's much harder when you're a WOHM OP so I'm with your DH.

cornishmumtobe · 06/05/2018 12:33

Haha! Love this

Mumto2two · 06/05/2018 12:39

Left DH in charge for a whole day, for the first time ever last week, and came home to a house of utter chaos, homework wars, unwashed, unbrushed...and he couldn’t think what to cook them...so had ordered dominoes for dinner Shock
It’s amazing how he can hold down such a senior position..but can’t manage one day alone at home...Confused
Enjoy your day OP!

EmiliaAirheart · 06/05/2018 12:47

Mumto2two, it didn't happen overnight though, did it? Do you see your role in this? If you (collectively) never saw fit to leave him in charge at home, then how is it at all surprising?

Also, I'd love to see how well some of the people on here would do at stepping into a different role for them on a day's notice, but sure...

Witchend · 06/05/2018 12:53
Grin After dd2 was born I had a conversation with DH that went along the lines of this. For context, he had always done bath time and I'd come in at the end and help dress.

DH: can you help as I find it hard having them both in the bath on my own
Me: Really?
DH: Actually it would be nice if you got them ready for bed, and then I can spend time with them rather than just doing bath time.
Me: So you're saying you can't cope with 2 DC in the bath but you think I should do the whole thing including dressing them on my own.
DH: Blush I see your point.

He did bath time Grin

romany4 · 06/05/2018 15:10

Many years ago now when our boys were small, I always used to argue with DH about when MY day off was as I was a SAHM and he worked. He always used to say I didn't need time off as having a 5 year old in school and an 18 month old was easy.
Until I had a fall and was in hospital and DH had to take a week off work. And he HAD to do everything including the school run with an 18 month old in tow, housework and cooking which was always done by me. I was getting several texts moaning how knackered he was while I was resting ( and sniggering) in my hospital bed. All he got in reply was "But you said it was easy!"
But afterwards he stepped up and pulled his weight a lot more.
Enjoy your peace!

TooStressyForMyOwnGood · 06/05/2018 15:12

YANBU. Hope you did do that extra long blow dry and enjoyed every second of it Grin.

Original poster
Jordan4531 · 06/05/2018 18:34

Wow a light hearted bit of fun has seriously ruffled some feathers. I think some people need to remove the spoon from their bums and lighten up. And who ever said it I'm not door mat don't make assumptions, my husband works A LOT so is hardly home to do his 'fair share' and I usually like us to be together when we can be. People on this site are obviously just looking for arguments or to be as negative as possible

OP posts:
BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 06/05/2018 18:41

@ivenotideawhatimdoing said

@Jordan4531 let him at it. Seriously.

What's that walk a mile in my shoes stuff? It is hard bloody work. Enjoy your wedding. It has nothing to do with supportive partners or not- we all need a reprieve. Go get yours! Then have a massive cuddle-in in the morning.

YANBU if you tell him to go fetch the paracetamol to cure what will hopefully be a super night.

Believeitornot · 06/05/2018 18:45

YANBU

Some DHs don’t seem to be able to take their wife’s word for it when they say it’s hard. They have to find out for themselves the hard way. Which is pretty jarring, I have to say.

Alienspaceship · 06/05/2018 18:46

Haha! Great post op. It you do need to reinforce the point with him that’s it’s dealing with it day in day out that’s REALLY knackering Wink

Tutlefru · 06/05/2018 18:59

And I thought the sun was meant to put people in a good mood...Grin

YANBU OP.

Enjoy the wedding.

JoanFrenulum · 06/05/2018 19:05

remove the spoon from their bums

...let out an enormous inelegant snort of laughter on the escalator and the lady in front gave me a V dirty look...

Mumto2two · 06/05/2018 20:05

Couldn’t agree more OP.
Understand our role in all this?? Like we’ve deliberately engineered this state of male ineptitude. DH has always worked long hours, long commute, and often overseas. And yes, on the weekends we are generally at home together, for the most part of any given day. Seems strange that’s such an alien concept to some people on here!
Live a little..laugh a lot Smile

Dieu · 06/05/2018 20:30

My children's father was able to do everything I could and probably more competently. My expectations of him wouldn't have allowed for it to be any other way.
Enjoy your time off though, OP! Wine

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