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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's next to impossible to find a job as a single parent?

60 replies

NoJobsExist · 05/05/2018 20:43

Im beginning to think it's impossible to find a job as a single parent unless you have family support for childcare or a specific qualification like teaching or you already had the job before you became single? At least where I live anyway.

Every job listed at the moment that isn't something qualified (like the teaching or accountant jobs that have daytime hours) wants fully flexible people, weekends and evenings, or it's shift work with 6am starts or 10pm finishes. Even the McDonald's and shop jobs (i.e. jobs you'd assume would need people for any opening hours) I've found expect you to be able to do any hours. Or it's zero hour jobs or bank staff so no guarantee of getting any shifts if you actually get hired. I've looked at factory work, cleaning, receptionist jobs, admin, retail, order picking, catering assistant jobs, care work...

It's not as if I can train up in anything to get one of the qualified jobs either. That requires money. Money comes from a job. Which I can't get.

How do single parents find jobs? Is there something I'm missing here?

OP posts:
niccyb · 05/05/2018 21:41

You should look on NHS jobs. They often ask for bank admin staff. This is also popular with students and the pay is good.
You could pick and choose your hours then including school time

HateIsNotGood · 05/05/2018 21:46

YANBU - it's always so precarious - you can set up formal childcare til it's fully Up The Swanney, but the whole pack of cards can come tumbling down so easily - child ill, childminder ill, transport probs, etc, etc - and generally your run of the mill employer doesn't operate along those lines.

Even though I could always find work prior to having DS, and minimally afterwards - the cards ended up on the floor when his autism affected everything.

No real advice to give but I understand and YANBU.

Summerisdone · 05/05/2018 21:50

I know you're very issue OP. I'm lucky in that I applied for a job as a chef in my local pub restaurant when it was owned by a different company and was less busy, so they were happy to take me on for just weekdays to fit around nursery hours, but if I was to apply there now then they absolutely would turn me away as my availability would be a deal breaker if I wasn't there already when they bought out the pub last year.

I'm still stuck in a shit position though, as I don't drive so I can't find a close enough job with better than minimum wage and part time hours whilst still fitting within nursery hours, but I'm not able to afford driving anytime soon unless I get a better paid full time job first Sad

UpstartCrow · 05/05/2018 21:50

Yanbu, those kinds of contracts did not used to be standard, and they can be used as an underhanded way to keep some people out of the workplace.

HundredsAndThousandsOfThem · 05/05/2018 21:53

YANBU. It's very difficult. Friends that have managed it have found jobs in admin or tied up with their child's school (dinner lady). In both cases though I think it relied on luck that an opportunity happened to become available.

Brainfogmcfogface · 05/05/2018 22:03

YANBU I’m in the same boat. Had hoped to become a TA and start a course in September, but so does every single parent in my area (was told this at the job centre by my work coach) and the courses are all booked up until 2020 at the local college. Besides that any positions that (rarely) become available have tons of applicants so chances of getting the job are low too.
I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do, nearly 4 years out of work now and confidence in my own abilities is zero.

Original poster
NoJobsExist · 05/05/2018 22:05

I've got retail and care experience but it's just the shifts they ask for that stop me being able to do the jobs. I've got a degree too but it's old and pretty useless really. It's my educational regret in life, doing a degree for the sake of going to university rather than choosing something career focused.

Round here the shops all want people who can do weekends too and the care jobs are all long day shifts or short shifts starting at 6am/7am which I just can't do. I'm right next door to loads of factories too that are always always hiring but they all want people to do shift work. It's very frustrating.

I never realised though that schools had so many staff! That's given me a bit of hope because there are loads of schools around here that are easy to get to. I love love love the idea of working for myself like childminding or something. Maybe the confidence to try something like that would be something I could work on.

I'm making a note of all the ideas you are all giving me though and it's very much appreciated! And I'm sorry for everyone else who is struggling too! I was starting to think it was just me Flowers

OP posts:
newmumwithquestions · 05/05/2018 22:19

YANBU op. I’m not single but have no family help and it’s hard enough. One of my friends is a single parent but with family help and she finds it hard enough.

To be a single parent with no family help must be very tough.

I also second the admin office work. I’ve worked in a lot of places where admin staff weren’t expected to work as late as the other staff, it was expected that admin would work 8-4 or 9-5 weekdays and no more even though there was an expectation that other roles would work late. Sadly the admin staff were often the worst paid staff apart from cleaners but it was above minimum wage.

You say there are factories. They will all need admin - could be worth trying?

RomeoBunny · 05/05/2018 22:20

Are those saying they're single parents actually lone parents or just split up from childrens Father? If the latter why isn't he taking on half the load of shit working hours and awkwardness around childcare so you can get at least part time hours? Otherwise he's just cocklodging in your actual life and future career really, while he carries on as normal.

RomeoBunny · 05/05/2018 22:22

OP I can recommend a few work from home phone jobs that pay well but they are 18+ and you'd need a landline/internet Blush

jocktamsonsbairn · 05/05/2018 22:22

I studied to be a teacher as a single parent. If you have a degree you can do a PGCE/PGDE in 9 months but it's bloody tough!! I had a part time job too! You get bursaries but we did live off a student loan plus my p/T wages. It was really hard going fir a short time but well worth it and you get help with paying child care from uni and tax credits.
You can do it but you need to really want to do it.
Before teaching I had 2 jobs Tomane ends meet, teaching assistant full time then I worked 2evenings and every 3rd weekend. Paid a teenage neighbour to babysit in evenings and my dc dad had them that weekend. Issues started when he stopped seeing them but that's another story.
Good luck and I hope you find something.

Fireandflames666 · 05/05/2018 22:30

I've been turned down for every single job I've applied for due to "not being able to be flexible". It's not my fault my ex cheated on me and that me and my two kids had to move out. My mum lives in France and my other family are mostly dead or nc.

abbsisspartacus · 05/05/2018 22:44

It's tricky I have a partner now I can cope on my own but it's cheaper if I can manage without massive childcare costs I was literally paying half my wages on childcare and half on housing I lost my job two weeks ago and all the jobs around are working weekends or way out of my area so long commute it sucks to be me and my kids right now

clairedelalune · 05/05/2018 22:50

What is your degree in?

Want2bSupermum · 05/05/2018 23:31

As a working parent I'm always needing help with childcare now the DC are in school. Is that something needed in your area? Most families are willing to pay cash in hand too so you would be doing your own self assessment but could make yourself a company so you could deduct a lot of the expenses most families expect you to absorb.

I pay a fortune for coverage when my DC are off sick. The lady who works in our area charges $200 a day and she is the go to person. She is great with them, like a grandma and she has them tucked up on her sofa watching a movie.

ElspethTascioni · 05/05/2018 23:45

I got office work by signing up to several temping agencies- that meant I was never without work, and on more than one occasion I ended up with longer term contracts covering sick/maternity leave so some stability! My typing skills were not sufficient to work as a secretary, so I largely got taken on as a receptionist, but it paid the bills and was always within available childcare hours.

I managed to get my professional qualifications studying part time, while working part time too, so eventually I got out of the minimum wage jobs.

Best of luck!

nokidshere · 05/05/2018 23:54

The lady who works in our area charges $200 a day and she is the go to person

200 a day Shock

Starlight2345 · 06/05/2018 19:50

Most are not prepared to pay cash in hand as they can use childcare vouchers, tax credits. Ip could find herself in a lot worse position if caught.

stressedandskint · 07/05/2018 07:43

I struggle too. 9 to 5 jobs are very thin on the ground now. Everywhere has longer opening times. I've seen some excellent jobs advertised as 9 to 5 but then it says "must be flexible to work evenings and weekends" or "must be able to attend evening meetings". I can access childcare from 7:30 til 6pm, they won't stay open for me to attend a bloody meeting!
It's driving single parents out of the workforce and keeping them in poverty. Most of the jobs that fit around standard school/childcare hours is low paid admin/receptionist/teaching assistant. It really annoys me. Something needs to be done about this.
I trained as a further education teacher teaching adults as I thought that would give me some stability and fit around school. Unfortunately jobs are very few and far between and most vacancies are temp jobs through agencies. I'd struggle to get to different jobs as I can't drive and I can't pass my test and pay for a car and insurance until I get a stable job with more hours. All I want is stability.

Tumbleweed101 · 07/05/2018 07:55

Nursery work is good as a single parent if the work place will let you use their wrap around care. Hours can be long but likely negotiatiable.

Metoodear · 07/05/2018 08:06

Not sure I agreee with it at all even

If a job is advertising full time you can always ring and ask if a job share is a option

Maternity jobs will always be willing to flex not council jobs flex and the council only opens office hours any way

Most shops flex I would say pretty much all supermarkets flex and also most food places flex

Their a numerous jobs in schools dinner ladies
Ta
That flex

Metoodear · 07/05/2018 08:07

I am a support worker I work 20 hours a week 8:30 till 3 my childcare is £18 a week

I married but my husband is a helpful as the cat with childcare very selfish even if he’s home early he doesn’t pick the kids up

Metoodear · 07/05/2018 08:10

AnnieAnoniMouser

We’re are you looking it took me 3 months from choosing to go back to work and the first job I took they were taking the piss so I left and got another job for weeks later

Would you tell me the area you live I bet I could find out 10 jobs for your to apply to

Sevendown · 07/05/2018 08:13

Office admin. M-f 9-5 fits around nursery and then breakfast and after school clubs which run m-f 8-6.

Local authorities are you best bet. With a degree you can work up.

Want2bSupermum · 07/05/2018 22:34

nokidshere If you have to go to work you do what you need to do. It's $200 for 8 hours, as you have to pick up before she picks up kids from school, so about $25 (about £16) an hour and there is no sales tax for childcare.

starlight It meets the criteria for self employment here.

Also vouchers barely touch the sides of what the cost is. We are set to spend $46k (about £30k) on childcare costs this year. We are very willing to pay so we can work and that means hiring good people. When my child isn't well enough to go to school and I have to go to work I'll pay a premium. I also pay for her lunch and ger Uber. She gets a nice gift for Christmas and if it's been a week of a sick child I will give her extra.