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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this policy is very sad

175 replies

ILikeMyChickenFried · 04/05/2018 12:24

Yesterday my son went to the Legoland discovery centre in Manchester. He went in with his Granddad whilst my husband popped into a shop aiming to join them later (we're annual pass holders)
Anyway, when DH got to Legoland he wasn't allowed in as a lone adult. They've a policy which bans lone adults from attending even of they're meeting up with family inside. No one was free to escort him through to his DF and DS so he had to spend half an hour (FIL isn't great at picking up!) Calling his DF to get them to.come back to the entrance so they could all go in together.
This was obviously a huge nuisance for him but it got me thinking how tragic it is than we can't trust lone adults within a facility aimed at children. Obviously it's for safeguarding and is probably a good thing but it's so sad that it's even needed.

OP posts:
MissionItsPossible · 04/05/2018 14:23

@daytripper28

You can explain yourself if you like but it doesn't change the fact that you initially (and incorrectly) questioned a man attempting to go into a shop on his own where a load of kids were but that wasn't the case at all.

Original poster
ILikeMyChickenFried · 04/05/2018 14:26

I see your point OP, but I also think what is the world coming to when people argue about their right as adults (with the mental capacity of adults) to visit a place aimed solely at young children.

I would imagine that most people falling foul of the policy would be in a similar situation to my family than wanting a fun day there alone

OP posts:
Tanith · 04/05/2018 14:28

Legoland isn't the only theme park with this policy. My DD attended a birthday party at one near us and a parent arrived to pick up his family. He had to wait at the entrance until they came out to him.

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 14:30

OP I was referring to other posters on the thread who seem to fancy a trip to the Discovery Centre child free. I can see why it was inconvenient for your DH but they need a blanket rule as a pervert wouldn't come along and say 'I fancy going in and finding myself a small child'. They would say ''I'm just meeting someone inside'.

Original poster
ILikeMyChickenFried · 04/05/2018 14:32

I think there's been a lot of confusion about what the place is and then people have just rolled with it

OP posts:
morningconstitutional2017 · 04/05/2018 14:55

It is a shame and sad that it's necessary. This is why a father at the park with his children daren't run up to help another child who has fallen and may need help because he'd be terrified of being thought a paedophile. A sad sign of the times but at least this isn't being brushed under the carpet as it was when I was a child.

catinapoolofsunshine · 04/05/2018 15:04

I wonder why, given the description from Doyou , the policy isn't no over 12s unless accompanying a younger child. Most over 12s are adult sized, which means that the equipment must be dangerous if used by an 8 stone, 5 ft 7 13 year old just as much as an 8 stone, 5 ft 7 36 year old. The suspect in the sexual attack linked to above was also described as a "boy" who couldn't be named for safeguarding reasons.

It seems keeping disabled adults with carers out on the basis of being over 18 is missing the boat, if the person who triggered the rule is actually in a group still allowed in... I wonder where the attack happened at Legoland Windsor, and whether it was a teenaged boy in the women's toilets?

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 15:16

catinapool there can be an enormous difference between one 12 year old and another. How would children prove their age? It's sensible to restricts adults only.

I can't see any 12+ child who knows what to expect wanting to go unless they were going as part of a group including younger children. They would hate it.

Also, a 12, or even a 15 year old also couldn't enter alone. They would have to be accompanied by an adult.

Isadora666 · 04/05/2018 15:49

Legoland at Manchester is akin to a play centre/soft play. I would find it very odd indeed if a lone adult wanted to go into a soft play.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 04/05/2018 15:54

It's just very sad that the threat of child abuse is so real that places like this ban adults from going in

Absolutely Sad

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 15:58

The same restrictions don't apply to the theme park, just to be clear. They apply here for safeguarding but also because of the suitability of the attraction for children only.

birdsdestiny · 04/05/2018 16:14

Restrictions on certain activities are absolutely fine. I might like to go to my local baby group, as DS is 13 I wouldn't be allowed in. It is fine to say no adults without children in a soft play.

chezare84 · 04/05/2018 16:22

Yes I remember that incident! Caused a huge backlash and got a lot of media attention. Shame that they haven’t changed their ways since! Angry

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 04/05/2018 18:41

Doyoumind but this man obviously enjoyed himself there, that's why he was a regular.

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 19:00

Perfectly I understand he enjoyed himself but the rule has to apply to everyone. Who gets to decide who is an exception to the rule if exceptions are made? Staff cannot be expected to assess the suitability of an individual.

I think they had made an allowance despite the policy being in place, but reviewed it and decided that they had to apply it across the board.

At any rate, they did say he could go if they were given notice and could accompany him around, so they were prepared to accommodate him.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 04/05/2018 19:05

What I mean is, you say that the place isn't suitable for adults, but there must have been something he could do. He's not a threat to children, he'd probably get on well with my DC.

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 19:11

I am surprised he found enough to enjoy himself week after week. But that's not the issue. I'm still going to come back to the point that they initially made him an exception to the rule and then on reviewing that decision changed their minds so as not to make any exceptions to the rule. You say he wasn't a threat to children but you are then putting the onus of deciding who is and isn't a threat on the staff, which isn't acceptable and it opens them up to genuine claims of discrimination.

catinapoolofsunshine · 04/05/2018 19:44

Doyoumind children theoretically / potentially have to prove their age (or their parents do) for reduced price entry, entry to 15 films etc. Soft play centers do often have age restrictions which are nowhere near 18 (under 3s section, under 6s etc,) no over 12s wouldn't be especially difficult, though you could alternatively have a height restriction, like a roller coaster but the opposite way around... My point is really that anywhere with a no unaccompanied over 18s is not primarily concerned about the physical size of its visitors - there are plenty of 6ft tall 13 and 14 year olds (there's a boy in my 12 year old's class who is 6 ft 5!)

Soft play places which encourage adults to play alongside their children abound unfortunately as you always get the 16 stone "fun dad" sliding down something trying to impress his wife or girlfriend or sister in law or someone with how fun he is and nearly crushing someone else's 15kg 4 year old... I think a lot of soft play places don't care at all about that, I wish they did...

Barbie222 · 04/05/2018 20:33

Possibly the rule was put in place to discourage / prevent groups of teenagers visiting. I absolutely feel for the man in the article but he might not have been the target of the policy. The fact that they need him to call in before he goes is a bit weird though.

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 20:58

catinapool a lone adult in soft play would, I'm sure, be removed. They have signs to say adults are only allowed on to help their children, and some don't permit any adults on equipment at all.

If they said no over 12s, then they would be alienating families with teenagers who also have younger children. This would make no sense commercially. It's a 'family' attraction. It's also next to the Sea Life Centre where there aren't the same policies. I'm sure there are height and age restrictions within the Discovery Centre in the soft play parts and on rides anyway from what remember.

EggysMom · 04/05/2018 21:14

Regarding the man with learning disabilities being 'permitted' to enter so long as the LL Discovery Centre had notice .... that's all fine if he is in the correct frame of mind on the planned day. However as parents of autistic children know, you can have all the plans in the world and they have to be discarded - I somehow doubt autistic adults are any different, I shall find out in ten years when our son grows up.

RubbishRobotFromTheDawnOfTime · 04/05/2018 21:18

The Edinburgh Science Festival does not allow lone adults to buy tickets to their main event hub, as the activities are aimed at children.

CatsCatsCats11 · 04/05/2018 21:25

They do adult nights once a month think it's something like the first Thursday of the month.

Smellyjo · 04/05/2018 21:31

Unfortunately most abuse happens within families/by someone known to the child rather than lone strangers, that danger is much more rare. Yet policies like this and their publicity perpetuate the 'stranger danger' idea and avoid society facing the more awful truth of how most sexual abuse occurs.

Doyoumind · 04/05/2018 21:56

Smellyjo commercial organisations have to cover themselves. There is a risk potentially posed by lone adults that they have to mitigate against. Also, if capacity is being used up by people who aren't the intended audience, again it doesn't make sense.