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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my midwife to explain my appointments?

54 replies

BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:20

I've had a letter in the post today following my blood tests last week for a Consultant led appointment at an ante-natal clinic. I have no idea if this is routine, why I have this appointment, what the appointment is for etc. It just came in the post. I literally just says 'please attend for an appointment with the consultant team at the ante-natal clinic'

It's for 20 days time exactly at which point I will be 17 weeks.

AIBU to be completely stressing regarding not knowing what this appointment is for? I've never had a baby before and am not going to sleep tonight as I'm so scared my blood tests have come back and this is what this appointment is in regards to. It seems like a lifetime to wait until tomorrow to call them.

Sorry if I seem a little neurotic however after three miscarriages I don't seem to be coping with pregnancy very well...

OP posts:
Amanduh · 03/05/2018 21:26

Are you being consultant led?

Original poster
BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:27

@Amanduh I've chosen to give birth in a freestanding midwife led unit. I am so clueless however as to what my care plan is and what appointments to expect. Feel like a fish out of water and it's a horrid feeling.

OP posts:
lifetothefull · 03/05/2018 21:29

I'm no expert, but I would imagine if there were a problem they would want to see you sooner than 20 days.

People see consultants for all sorts of routine reasons. I saw one because I had previously had a c section. Your reason is probably a routine reason why you need extra monitoring. Don't worry, it just means they are taking good care of you. By all means, call to ask what the reason is, if it will put your mind at ease.

FranticallyPeaceful · 03/05/2018 21:29

It will just be a checkup at 17 weeks. I’m also consultant led. Don’t worry. If it was anything else they’d phone you to book you in within a couple of days to make sure you could definitely attend

steff13 · 03/05/2018 21:29

I didn't want to read and run. I'm in the US, and that's not how my doctor did things; at the end of each appointment, he told me when he would want to see me again and what to expect at that appointment, then I scheduled it before I left. One time he wanted to see me between appointments, and he called me and explained why.

Do you know what the blood tests were for? I have an underactive thyroid so I had to have blood drawn ever time to check my TH levels, so I'm not sure what's normal.

I'm sorry, I've been no help at all. :( I hope it's just a standard appointment.

InDubiousBattle · 03/05/2018 21:30

So have you been mw led up to now, with an appointment with bloods at 16 weeks, then a letter with a consultant appointment?

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 03/05/2018 21:31

I think recurrent miscarriages are a reason to see a consultant.

I'm seeing one with in this pregnancy because I'm rubbish at giving birth and over 40. My midwife had a list and there were various things on it but I had ds at the appointment so didn't pay a huge amount of attention to the other stuff but I think it included stuff like repeated miscarriage, high bmi, low bmi, diabetes, mental health issues, previous childbirth issues.

If there was anything bad about the blood tests they would want to see you a lot faster than a further 20 days away plus they usually phone.

Original poster
BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:31

@InDubiousBattle I'm 14 weeks at the moment and have seen my midwife once and had my 12 week scan. She hasn't explained any of the appointments to me. She's even asked me to text her tomorrow to remind her to book my next appointment. I'm just confused about everything to be honest. Not what I expected from a midwife.

OP posts:
InDubiousBattle · 03/05/2018 21:31

Are you over 40, over weight, any diabetes or other health problems?

Amanduh · 03/05/2018 21:32

It’s probably just a routine appointment perhaps due to your miscarriages etc. Both my SILs saw a consultant at 16/17 weeks. It’s pretty standard. However your midwife should have explained all this to you! Sounds like she isn’t doing her job properly. Please try not to worry - easier said than done I know, I worried about every single thing! I had a list with all my expected appointments and dates in my notes, do you have anything like that?

Original poster
BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:32

@InDubiousBattle 27, in good health, no problems, on no medication, partner is the same, had 3 miscarriages but they said this was unexplained and no underlying reason for it so no extra care would be needed... I'm confused!

OP posts:
Amanduh · 03/05/2018 21:33

Oh and if it was something from your bloods it wouldn’t be an appt sent like that.

Original poster
BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:33

Thanks everyone. It's hard not knowing what's going on!

OP posts:
InDubiousBattle · 03/05/2018 21:35

With my first baby my appointments went:
-booking in appointment (I was 7-8 weeks), blood tests and medical history
-12 weeks scan
-16 weeks appointment with mw
-20 weeks scan
-24, 28, 32, 36 week appointment with mw

My ds was born small so with my second baby I was consultant led and had many more scans and appointments. Dd was also breech until 36 ish weeks.

stayhomeclub · 03/05/2018 21:37

I would contact PALs and tell them what you’ve told us, ask them to put you in touch with someone who can sit down and explain your care plan and what to expect. Otherwise you might end up with several situations like this, it’s poor really. Services are stretched but you should know what’s going on with your care.

InDubiousBattle · 03/05/2018 21:38

If your bloods had come back with a problem they would have wanted to see you sooner I think.

BuntyCollocks · 03/05/2018 21:38

It’ll be your 16 week appointment where you get to hear baby’s heartbeat if they cooperate. General well-being check up. Discussion of 12 week scan, results from tests, offering you your 20 week scan. Tbh it should have been made for you at your booking in appt.

Saturdayselling · 03/05/2018 21:39

Every single appointment I had was like that. Utterly incomprehensible. They were good about at least telling me which clinic it was for/whether it was a scan when I rang up.

Does the appointment bear any relationship to the list of appointments in your notes? Should be in the front page, if anything like mine?

My blood results got sent to me with any comment or follow up. Does your unit not do this?

I suspect they are not related at all. Three miscarriages is often the point at which more help is offered. I saw the haematology consultant's team, was under the thyroid clinic and met with the consultant once, and then just seemingly randomly met the obs and gyn consultant team in each pregnancy. No idea why. Probably about the same point. Huge wait each time. Totally pointless.

Mybabystolemysanity · 03/05/2018 21:41

I had a consultant appointment at around 24 weeks in first pregnancy. It was more or less routine. Had a bit of history with blood pressure and I think that was the reason why. No sign of one in second pregnancy.

It's a real bugbear of mine that midwives won't explain what they're doing and why, which way baby is lying and so on.

shouldawouldadid · 03/05/2018 21:41

I was consultant led care because I have a high BMI so considered higher risk. It’s didnt make any difference to my care as far as I could see as overall I’m pretty healthy and I only had one appt each pregnancy.
Because I was classed as higher risk I wasn’t able to give birth in the midwife led unit, had to go into the hospital unit both times so bear in mind that IF you are being classed as higher risk you might be restricted a bit more in your choices of birthing centre.
If it was anything urgent they would want to see you before then so I don’t think you need to panic but it’s worth a call to check why you’ve got the appointment.Smile

GilligansKitchenIsland · 03/05/2018 21:42

At the hospital where I work (as a midwife) it's routine to see a consultant around 17-20 weeks if you've had 3 or more miscarriages. So it's likely that that's the reason if there's nothing else in your history you could attribute it to (age, BMI, underlying medical conditions).
But if you look in your notes there should be a) a schedule of care that outlines the routine appointments that everyone gets, and b) your midwife should have written a short summary of what she did in your last appointment, and then a plan going forward - that might give you some clues too.
To echo PPs, if it was something serious or urgent they would have phoned you. (As a tip, it's worth setting your voicemail up to have your name in the answer message so that they're allowed to leave voicemails if they call and you don't pick up.) Give them a ring tomorrow if you don't see anything in your notes this evening to reassure you.

GilligansKitchenIsland · 03/05/2018 21:44

It's a real bugbear of mine that midwives won't explain what they're doing and why, which way baby is lying and so on.

If this is happening, please raise it with the clinic coordinator. Midwives should be giving you this information. They probably write it in your notes but they need to at least tell you where they're writing it and how to interpret the jargon and abbreviations!

Original poster
BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:47

I don't have any notes. Only this rubbish online system that I can't access!

OP posts:
pastabest · 03/05/2018 21:47

Have you had your NT results back yet from your 12 week scan and bloods?

Original poster
BigMama99 · 03/05/2018 21:47

@pastabest they couldn't do NT as baby wouldn't stop moving so I had the bloods on their own and an due a quadruple test in a couple of weeks.

OP posts:
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