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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU to speak to school?

60 replies

Queenofthestress · 03/05/2018 15:55

I've just done the school run. Leaving out the doors, look behind me to check where DS is and spot his friend (same age, 4) chugging on an energy drink. I know that it was definitely an energy drink because I've had the same one before and it said it down the side of the can. I don't feel like I can raise it with the mum as I see her once in a blue moon.
Should I raise it with her when I see her next which more than likely won't be for another couple weeks or raise it with the teacher at school?
First time encountering this type of issue so I have no idea what's normally done

OP posts:

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 03/05/2018 16:00

Honestly... you do nothing. It might not be an ideal choice of drink but I assume his parents know he purchased it (I cannot imagine he came to school by himself at 4 so the adult he was with is already aware).

The school won't bat an eyelid, it's not a safeguarding issue and there's nothing they can do about what children consume outside of school.

Just ignore it and do nothing.

chickenowner · 03/05/2018 16:00

Who gave the drink to the 4 year old?

If it was one of his parents then I don't think it's your business to comment.

If it was a member of school staff then there may be a reason for it that you don't know about, and again, don't think it's your business.

Wolfiefan · 03/05/2018 16:02

What exactly do you want the school to do? Unless it was in the kid's lunch box it's nothing to do with them.
I doubt the parent will thank you and then see the error of your ways if you raise it. You will most likely be told to fuck off!

Oopsy41 · 03/05/2018 16:05

You shouldn't do anything, you'll constantly see parents make choices that are different to your own but that doesn't mean you should talk to them about it. I don't think children should be given energy drinks either but the parents will decide for themselves.

Original poster

Queenofthestress · 03/05/2018 16:11

It was more of a what the fuck moment than anything, you know one of those moments where you have to do a double take?
Energy drinks and fizzy drinks are banned on school grounds. I do know the mum sort of, and there wasn't any health reason as far as she's told me but ah well I'll leave it, I had no idea what on earth I should do or if I should do anything at all

OP posts:

CalF123 · 03/05/2018 16:15

YWBVVU.

What the other child's parents choose to give him to eat or drink is nothing to do with you, unless they're giving him cigarettes or crack cocaine.

bastardlyandmutley · 03/05/2018 16:15

Children having energy drinks is one of my bugbears. I used to be one of those aunties who used to let my little nephew have pretty much anything but I had a massive problem with energy drinks & they were banned from my house. I still don't believe that people need them, no matter what age.

Haven't Tesco stopped selling them to under eighteens?

I would mention it to the school TBH. All that caffeine must be terrible in such a young body. Also, if I were a teacher I wouldn't want to teach some kid buzzing on that much caffeine.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/05/2018 16:18

As much as I judge parents who give fizzy drinks to their kids, what do you want the school to do?

You are being completely unreasonable here. If a teacher sees the drink, they could remove it there and then, but "telling" the following day will make you sound deranged.

What is normally done is NOTHING. People parent differently, it's not up to you to intervene. Would you really report every child you see eating a pack of crisps or sweets or drinking coke or squash? Good luck with that.

I bet you get posters that will tell you that squash or fizzy drinks are not cocaine, are perfectly healthy, didn't do them any harm and save their children from dying of dehydration.

coffeecupofmilk · 03/05/2018 16:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Agent13 · 03/05/2018 16:19

I’m not sure what you think the teacher would do about it

Yeah it’s not great but it’s not a reporting kind of situation.

Babyplaymat · 03/05/2018 16:20

If they are banned on school grounds that alone is a reasonable cause to mention it.

That1950sMum · 03/05/2018 16:20

I agree it is piss poor parenting but not up to you to do anything. What do you expect the school to do?

Original poster

Queenofthestress · 03/05/2018 16:23

ikeepaforkinmypurse oh give up acting like I'm asking something bloody horrendous and over exaggerating about the bloody crisps & coke/squash. It's an energy drink, something that is illegal to sell to minors. It's also something that can screw a kid up in such a small amount of time, so sue me for being concerned.

I've already said I'm leaving it and doing nothing, thank you to the people who didn't act like I was being nosey as shit and actually got where I was coming from.

OP posts:

Pinga · 03/05/2018 16:26

Not your child so its not your issue.

This will be the first of MANY instances where you will raise an eyebrow and wonder agog at the choices other parents make. Just as they will raise an eyebrow at yours.

Raise then lower your eyebrow, smile and do nothing. :)

AjasLipstick · 03/05/2018 16:28

I would have thought energy drinks are potentially dangerous for such a small child. What brand was it OP?

Pengggwn · 03/05/2018 16:29

I think it's dangerous to feed your 4 year old bloody Monster or whatever

I would definitely mention it to school.

AjasLipstick · 03/05/2018 16:30

A teenaged boy died after drinking a latte, a mountain dew and then an energy drink.

A teenage boy has a good amount of height and weight on a four year old...some energy drinks contain enormous amounts of caffeine.

I'm no health freak ...I let my 13 year old have the odd coffee....but a FOUR year old with an energy drink seems dangerous.

8DaysAWeek · 03/05/2018 16:30

I'm surprised with the majority of replies. A 4 year old having an energy drink!? This isn't a case of a young child being given a chocolate bar or packet of crisps. It's slightly worse than just subpar parenting, surely?

If you tell the school then they could bring it up with the parents - as it breaches school rules - and who knows, maybe the parents will rethink. Maybe not but worth a shot.

ikeepaforkinmypurse · 03/05/2018 16:33

Come on OP, I don't agree with giving that sort of crap to children, but you are being ridiculous. Either you do something immediately, or you let it go.

At most, ask the school to remind parents that energy drinks are forbidden on school grounds, that's the most they can do. What did you think they could do? Summon the parent and tell them off because of someone say-so?

Your overly shocked and outraged post makes you sound like you need to get a life frankly.

AjasLipstick · 03/05/2018 16:33

A can of Monster has 36mg of caffeine in it whilst a shot of coffee...the like of which you'd get in Nero in your cappuccino has 17. So....not something a small child should have.

Was it a Monster OP?

AjasLipstick · 03/05/2018 16:35

Purse but she's not being over the top...it's not allowed for children to buy things like Red Bull...at least stores such as Asda have that as policy. Not sure of law.

Perhaps the Mother doesn't realise.

FlyingElbows · 03/05/2018 16:36

Seriously what do you expect the school to do? They're not the child police and if you want to avoid being "that mum" then ffs don't go confronting a woman you don't know over what she chooses to give her own child. Just don't.

I agree with you that's it's an inappropriate thing for him to have but don't panic because if he's got it in school his teacher will deal with it (I'm constantly agog at the mountains of rubbish I see in school bags). Out of school it's not their business or yours.

dementedpixie · 03/05/2018 16:38

Our local stores won't sell them to under 16s so not ideal for that age group. People have been hospitalised after drinking them

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 03/05/2018 16:39

*t's not allowed for children to buy things like Red Bull...at least stores such as Asda have that as policy. Not sure of law.

Perhaps the Mother doesn't realise*

Ok 2 things stand out from this ridiculous comment.

The child clearly didn't purchase the drink, the child is 4!
The child was with an adult as 4 year olds don't go home by themselves therefore I think it is safe to assume the mother is aware.

I don't understand why people are shocked that you are being told to keep out of it. It is nothing to do with you and the school cannot do anything about it either, therefore the sensible advice above has simply explained it is best not to think about it as people all parent differently. I am not saying that an energy drink for a 4 year old is good but it is their choice, there are worse things they could be doing and their child is not going to be removed as a result of it.

Lavalamped · 03/05/2018 16:40

I'd be concerned and mention it to the teacher and leave it up to them

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