I’ve had that happen and gave up on those people. I was obviously their plan b/back up friend and my time meant nothing to them. It meant nothing to them to accept plans (I was the one always inviting and if I didn’t contact, I wouldn’t hear from them unless they needed something, like a job reference), and then wait until an hour or so prior to meet time, and cancel with some flimsy excuse.
I understand sometimes things happen and people truly need to cancel. When they do it every time, then no, it means “a better offer” came along, or they just didn’t feel like going any more.
It pisses me off more when they claim busy as a reason for not contacting; I’m busy too, so that’s no excuse. I don’t get out much outside of kids or full time work, and look very forward to having time out. So each time one would last minute ditch was so upsetting.
I had one that was a repeat offender, also a former work mate. One of those times, he kept texting, making absolute sure I was going to a concert weeks prior. I assured him, yes, already had the ticket. A few days before he said he couldn’t go, as he had an out of town trip that weekend... and he’d forgotten. It wasn’t a work trip and he didn’t go out of town for work, so it wasn’t like it was a routine numbness to it that made him forget. It was a fun trip to a different concert in a city a few hours away. He actually complained to a mutual acquaintance that he thought I was mad at him for cancelling on me. Of course I was, underneath, he knew that was rude. I guess because I’d simply replied, “okay,” rather than give some gushing response “don’t mind me, I understand your other plans are much more important.”
Another time he was very late to meet (like you, I had waited an hour past time at a cafe), and he finally responded after that hour, that he was with other friends and that’s why he was late. Said he would be there in about 15, then called at that point to ask if I minded that those friends come along. I only waited as I had driven over half an hour, I did like the cafe, and as I’ve stated, so rarely get time with friends.
The last time for that one, was a couple of hours cancellation prior to a meet up. I was getting ready when I received the text claiming he was sick and probably food poisoned from the night previous. He’d forgotten that he had told me he was going to a friend’s wedding the night before our meet up, and I figured he was just hung over. I’ve had food poisoning a few times, and it doesn’t take all night to manifest symptoms. I didn’t bother responding and he’s not contacted me since.
Anyway, I went on a tangent, sorry. I just know how you feel and that pisses me off for you. Definitely do not text back, just forget her. You’re time is important too, and you deserve friends who are actually friends.