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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

How did you know you ended up with the right person

45 replies

DrowningEveryDay · 02/05/2018 06:42

for you?

OP posts:

Sunafterstorm · 02/05/2018 08:45

We 'just knew' and 45 years later we are still together, but I think the poster who said 'we rub along well together 'has it right.

FinallyHere · 02/05/2018 13:25

Life is more fun with him around, when i do things without him, i wonder how he would enjoy it and we look forward to sharing news and, if possible, the actual experience with each other.

We have as PP mentioned changed around each other, in political views, in interests and in accommodating each others quirks. He is a decent human being and I believe, respects my opinions. If I ever find myself not wanting to tell him about something, it's usually a sign that I am somehow ashamed or, at least, not too proud of something.

His mother once told me that I 'have a good 'un there' and I do believe she was right.

Bluelady · 02/05/2018 13:31

The fact that he's prepared to put up with me and has been for 20 years tells me he's "the one".

Keeptrudging · 02/05/2018 13:33

I feel utterly safe with him, he is incredibly lovely to everyone, I know we've always got each other's backs. We fell for each other on first meeting, and are still very much in love. He's my best friend.

tradervictoria · 02/05/2018 13:43

You won't know until the end.

fantasmasgoria1 · 02/05/2018 14:21

I just knew but he is respectful, loving, caring, funny and generally makes me the centre of his world. I am myself around him as he is around me. He is absolutely amazing! Bad I know but after two abusive marriages I was just hoping for someone who would hurt me a little less than the others! I realise that was bad!

MereDintofPandiculation · 02/05/2018 14:25

He makes me feel good about myself, not just physically, he makes me feel as if I am a nice person.

YearOfYouRemember · 02/05/2018 14:26

I knew he was different as I was myself from day one. We used to be very happily married.

FASH84 · 02/05/2018 14:27

Because I can 100% be myself with him, and even when we argue I can't imagine my life without him

purplelass · 02/05/2018 14:29

You don't.

You just hope you have based on the information available to you at the time... and hope that they think you're the right person for them and that nothing changes.

(voice of bitter experience here!)

lanbury · 02/05/2018 14:41

When my best friend became my lover. We've known each other since school and been together for over thirty years and I can't imagine life without him

BeyondThePage · 02/05/2018 14:47

as they say on the Simpsons - having him around "embiggens" me...

I am always happy to see him enter a room. always.

Trinity66 · 02/05/2018 14:50

I knew after about two weeks that I was going to marry my DH, I don't know, I just knew it was him and I remember thinking that I don't think I'd find someone who would make me happier, 15 years later I still think the same

CuriousaboutSamphire · 02/05/2018 14:50

Ach! That's easy to answer.

33 years later we haven't killed each other

Smeddum · 02/05/2018 14:51

The fact that we are best friends, I don’t mean that in a cheesy, trite way at all. Quite the opposite, we support each other, we look out for each other, we laugh a lot together, and we trust each other.

When we met I was still recovering from my very abusive marriage (4 years after I’d left, I’d been single all that time because I was afraid of men). He never once pressured me, he understood where I was coming from, he supported me and never judged or criticised.

So alongside the physical attraction, great sex and romance, there’s a solid foundation which is crucial to me.

MinaPaws · 02/05/2018 14:55

@gabsdot
I don't think you end up with the right person. You make yourselves right for each other.

That's so wise. So true. Never thought of it this way before.

BornInALighthouse · 02/05/2018 15:00

I'm sure on paper we'd be more suited to other people but we just fit. We've been through some amount of crap to date and we're still here making each other smile. 4 years ago he proposed and we might actually get married this year!

CaffeineAndCrochet · 02/05/2018 15:36

I am always happy to see him enter a room. always.

I can't say the same. I love DP and I can't wait to marry him but there's times I also want space.

KnopeforAmerica · 02/05/2018 15:43

I loved previous boyfriends but i realised after a while with my now DH that i could be myself with him in a way i hadn't with the others. I didn't feel a need to pretend to like things/ be someone i wasn't comfortable with.

BeyondThePage · 02/05/2018 15:45

I am always happy to see him enter a room. always.

I can't say the same. I love DP and I can't wait to marry him but there's times I also want space.

I like space too, but I am still happy to see him enter the room. He knows when I need space and does not intrude on it - he can physically be there, but not "in my space".

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