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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To dislike taking parcels for neighbours?

22 replies

Notcontent · 30/04/2018 22:19

I think it’s a helpful thing to do and will continue to do so BUT I just hate knowing that they will probably knock on the door at a really inconvenient time... I usually try to take it over to them but one neighbour in particular has a lot of parcels delivered and gets home late, so I never know what time she might turn up to claim it...

OP posts:

Bojangles33 · 30/04/2018 22:20

It's a little bit antisocial but you can just say no! I'm sure the postperson will take it to another neighbour.

Woshambo · 30/04/2018 22:22

I hate it too. I've done it loads but still unsure of the etiquette.

On the flip side my neighbours can't wait to take in our parcels for some reason. I've opened the door several times now to the delivery person shouting across "no no it's ok they're in"

Candyflosss · 30/04/2018 22:24

You have no obligation to take it. I would stop helping if they knock on my door after 8pm.

GrumpyOldMare · 30/04/2018 22:30

I stopped taking them for my neighbours after realising that they would never knock for the parcel,despite a card going through their letterbox. I always had to go and knock on their door,with their parcel when I realised they'd come home.

MorganKitten · 01/05/2018 13:19

I say no all the time, I once had a parcel for three months so unless I know them really well I don't take them.

Waggingmyginger · 01/05/2018 13:21

Talk to her. Say you don't mind taking parcels as it saves her a trip but could she call for them after x and before x so as not to put you out?

LucyEvans26 · 01/05/2018 13:25

If you're home then why not? I work long hours and don't want to go to the post office which shuts at like 12.00 on a weekend- I do buy my neighbours a bottle of wine if they've taken in a lot. really don't see what the problem is- its called being neighbourly

PersianCatLady · 01/05/2018 13:31

A delivery man knocked on my door and asked if I would take in some parcels for a neighbour.

He came back with a whole suite of nursery furniture (flatpack) and it took up my small hallway.

In the meantime my neighbour had gone into labour and she didn't come home for another four days.

It was a pain to have so much stuff in the hallway but I would do the same thing if asked again.

Scootingthebreeze · 01/05/2018 13:32

I had a parcel sat here for months and when I finally caught the neighbour in and have it back they were really not fussed and gave the distinct impression I could have had it for months more. I still take for other neighbours just not for them

chuckiecheese · 01/05/2018 13:32

If I am at home I take in a parcel and my neighbours do the same for me. I will then pop round to them to give it to them unless they knock on the door first. There has never been a problem and I am 45 and have lived in several homes.

Is it not kind and considerate to do this?

Is this not part of living in a community?

Unless my neighbours are awful I cannot see why you would not.

Tamingoftheglue · 01/05/2018 13:34

At our last house the neighbours were the sort that never opened the door to anyone. If you hadn't called before coming round, the wife would ignore you.

So whenever they had parcels, if her son's or husband weren't there when deliveries came, we always took them in. Despite delivery guy leaving a card, they wouldn't come and get their parcels either we would always be forced to take them round ourselves (especially when said parcels were so large they stopped me getting the pram out the door!)

Anyway, when we put our house on the market, they bought it from us for their son. At first the parcels were still getting delivered to their house. I was still taking them in when she didnt answer the door and one day I told the delivery driver I wouldn't take it. It wasn't just a few things, think young man furnishing first house, it was a lot of items. Well the delivery man was really arsey with me and said could I tell the neighbour that then because it was written in the instructions box to bring it to our house! I said he could tell them and shut the door in his face.

After that it went quiet for a bit until they actually started to have parcels delivered to our house in the son's name as if he was already living there. Cheeky fuckery!

Tamingoftheglue · 01/05/2018 13:36

Btw I would still take parcels for my neighbours at our new house, I just think there's no need for people to take the piss with it.

Frosty66612 · 01/05/2018 13:36

I just say “sorry I can’t as I won’t be at home for a day or two for them to come and get it from me”. It might be antisocial but none of the neighbours on my street are friendly with each other and we all keep ourselves to ourselves.

WonderTweek · 01/05/2018 13:41

I always take in our neighbours’ parcels even though I don’t particularly like doing it (I’m a hermit who prefers not to talk to people ). We took a neighbour’s delivery in once and then I went into labour and was in various hospitals for five days and when the neighbour finally got her parcel back she was really pissy about the delay. I’d stop taking in her deliveries but I can’t rememb what number she lives in. Haha.

My husband took a delivery in for another neighbour and it was a 24-pack of Thatchers Haze. It was then collected by about a 12-year-old kid who was clearly sent in by his dad, but I thought that it would be a clever way to get booze if you’re underage.

MrsPreston11 · 01/05/2018 13:43

I will do it for 2 of mine, but no one else.

Used to take a lot for the woman 2 doors down and it just got silly. She knew she wasn't going to be in but just knew I was going to be in so used me.
So then I just started saying no or not answering the door.

echt · 01/05/2018 13:43

YANBU to dislike it, who can tell you how to feel? Sooo do you mean you want to stop doing it or just carry on not liking doing it?

viques · 01/05/2018 13:46

I take stuff for the whole street apart from the evil people next door. I say to the delivery people , sorry I don't take for number 17, and if I am feeling kind I tell them the neighbours on their other side don't take their parcels in either so don't bother knocking.

redpickle · 01/05/2018 13:49

I work from home and my desk is in the window at the front. I had so many knocks on the door before Christmas I closed the blind and sat in the darkness to avoid it. It was so disruptive. Annoying thing was, I missed a couple of my own parcels.

One neighbour in particular never collects so I decline theirs now.

Flomper · 01/05/2018 13:49

I dont mind taking in parcels at all. However, I have one very firm rule. I. do. not. deliver. If I am kind enough to take in a a parcel, they come and fetch it. Luckily i have a large garage near the door so just dump everything in there til they collect. Never been more than a day.

Lethaldrizzle · 01/05/2018 13:59

V happy to take in parcels but will not deliver

GeekyBlinders · 01/05/2018 14:13

I always read these threads and feel that I must be really weird, because I quite like taking parcels in. I like feeling that I've done my good deed for the day (both for my neighbours and for the courier/post person), and also feel less guilty about them taking in my parcels if I'm out.

GeekyBlinders · 01/05/2018 14:15

And I take my toddler son to deliver them because he loves handing parcels over. We do live on a very quiet and friendly cul-de-sac though.

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