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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Overposting on SM?

19 replies

Onpoint32 · 30/04/2018 14:16

I don’t have children but hope to soon..

Just a thought that occurred to me..I often hear people saying “eugh all she does is post photos of her kid on Instagram”. The consensus is that no one is interested. This happened with a mutual friend. Apparently she’s “gone nuts” on insta since having her first baby two weeks ago. She’s posted 6 photos. I tend to post the odd pic every few weeks so I wouldn’t say I’m a prolific user myself but it struck me that she wasn’t being ott. I believe her page is private so the only audience is people she’s approved.

I hear this all the time and only ever about babies/kids. It’s not something that I lose sleep over but AIBU in thinking that people get oddly snippy about it?

OP posts:

Nikephorus · 30/04/2018 14:19

6 photos in 2 weeks, and the first 2 weeks of having a child at that?! Can't see the problem & I never post photos.
But then if someone was posting 1000s I'd just ignore them and stop looking anyway...

ClumsyFool · 30/04/2018 14:20

I don’t really understand the angst tbh. I hardly post on social media but it makes no difference to me how many pictures people post. The only thing that bothers me is racist/discriminatory bile but then I just delete people if they post or share that kind of thing.

ClumsyFool · 30/04/2018 14:22

@Onpoint32 sorry that didn’t read right, I meant other people’s angst about how many pictures someone posts, not about you asking the question.

Original poster

Onpoint32 · 30/04/2018 14:22

Those are my general thoughts tbh. I imagine it’s a very exciting time and the temptation to post pics is quite natural

OP posts:

chocolateavocado99 · 30/04/2018 14:29

I wouldn't be surprised that someone posted 6 baby pics of a new born. They are excited and experiencing so much change.
But, I have no patience for people who post daily / weekly pictures of their kids. Or even worse....fb On this day. I can't fathom why anyone else would be interested in seeing baby pics of a now 10 year old on a weekly basis.
I am not a huge fb fab and I post pictures of my dcs maybe 3 times a year, so I may be in the minority. I try to control my irritation and just keep scrolling.

FatBottomedGal · 30/04/2018 14:34

I have a friend who is like this with her two dogs. She sends me photos of her dogs at least 3 times a day (I never respond - she hasn't got the message), and puts photos of them on Facebook & Instagram probably every day/every other day. I have hidden her on Facebook but can't subtly hide her on Instagram as far as I know - she's one of my best friends so I don't want to actually unfollow her!

Whether its pets or children, it's pretty boring for everyone else.

whiteonesugar · 30/04/2018 14:45

It makes me laugh when people moan about people who post photos on instagram. That's what it's for!

You can post want you want on your own social media. Post pictures of your kids, your garden, your dinner, the snow, the sun, a drink, whatever. If people don't want to look at pictures then maybe instagram isn't for them...!

BrightYellowDaffodil · 30/04/2018 14:48

I don't even have children and 6 pictures of a first-born in two weeks sounds entirely reasonable. Restrained, even.

I guess the nub of the complainers' issue is that they don't want to see the pictures and have decided that the mutual friend shouldn't post them in the first place. They're being unreasonable; it's her Instagram account and she can post what she likes. If they don't like it there's an unfollow button - I quietly unfollowed an acquaintance who only ever posted about football and passive-aggressive memes, which I can't bear.

londonrach · 30/04/2018 14:48

But isnt that the reason fb is there. I love seeing friends children as they change alot especially as a baby. Still waiting to see one new photo with the eyes open despite regular photos.

Echobelly · 30/04/2018 14:49

I try not to go mad on the posting about my kids, I don't think I tend to go overboard. Sometimes I won't post about them for a while, then I might have two or three in a row. Just checked my last 20 FB posts and 3 of those were about the kids (though no pics of the kids) and another two about parenting.

A couple of not very close contacts have unfriended me on FB and I suspect it's because they're not interested in the kids stuff, and I'm fine with that, they're not close and they're entitled not to be interested in the kind of stuff I post about.

FrenchJunebug · 30/04/2018 14:52

I never post picture of my kid on Social Media as I want to protect his anonymity.

SendintheArdwolves · 30/04/2018 15:48

You might say "People can post whatever they want on their social media - their kids, their pets, their hobbits, endless discussion of their latest running times, memes of lord of the rings, etc - and anyone who doesn't want to see it can just unfollow or hide their posts".

Which is fine for everything except kids. Because your children are humans who are going to grow up and when they do, they will discover a vast digital footprint of information about themselves that they had no say in and now cannot undo.

Partly I don't like seeing pics of people's children on fb/wherever because I'm not really that interested. But it also makes me uncomfortable because I think about how I would feel if my childhood had been turned into a public display to gratify my parents' need for attention and I'm really glad I'm just a bit too old for that to have happened.

systemlakeland · 30/04/2018 15:51

People get snippy about pretty much everything these days, OP

I wouldn't worry about it. You may want to go photo-crazy when your time comes. Or not.

I take far too many photos of my darling dog. I can't help myself! It doesn't really matter.

I've heard a lot of people get bored by too many pet photos too, so it's not just children.

Haberpop · 30/04/2018 16:33

I always thought the whole point of Instagram was to post your photos of whatever you like to photograph on? Am I missing something?

RedPanda2 · 30/04/2018 19:00

If someone incessantly posts pictures if their kids (especially eating) I unfollow thrm on FB & would definitely unfollow them on Instagram. It is their account to use as they see fit, but don't get pissy if people unfollow!

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 30/04/2018 19:17

I don’t post photos of my children on social media. I might have a Facebook status about them once a week, maybe every 3 or 4. I’m happy to see photos of other people’s children once or twice a week.

A few years ago I accepted a friend request from DH’s friend’s girlfriend. A few weeks later she told me she liked me because I didn’t go on and on about baby DD. I was rather lulled into a false sense of security because she is the kind of person who posts daily about being ill/in Work/on holiday/in the gym/eating out/going to the pub in a pretty irritating way. I’d rather hear about someone’s kids than your ear infection tbh.

youthrewmysandwichAWAY · 30/04/2018 19:19

The funniest thing is these people dont realise their photos of food and cats aren’t riveting either.

SharronNeedles · 30/04/2018 19:51

It can be ... I don't even know what word I'm looking for here but when you see someone who only posts pictures of their perfect baby, all posed and in freshly pressed clothes or wrapped up in hundreds of blankets and hats whilst yours is wearing odd socks with no top on and his nappy on his head it just makes you feel a bit.... You know?
I follow someone who I do get on with and her DS is gorgeous but every picture you can tell she has positioned him to look like he is doing something or looking a certain way. She either has a very obedient baby or she spends hours each day snapping to get the right picture.

We live in a very social media world now, it's jokingly said so often 'if it's not on Facebook it's not official' but I think some people genuinely think this. 6 pics in 2 weeks is not bad by any stretch, but some people do post hundreds

SoozC · 30/04/2018 21:02

I don't post on FB much but will probably go a bit mad if my current pregnancy actually results in a baby! It's easy to unfollow on SM and I wouldn't blame anyone who didn't want to see my photos from unfollowing me. Bit harsh to unfriend, though.

I currently have a friend who posts nothing but endless photos of her pets and those 50s-style meme things so I unfollowed her. We can stay friends without me having to 'like' photos of her dogs.

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