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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

If you’ve ever broken down on a motorway....

93 replies

Lookatmeimsandradeeee · 29/04/2018 23:14

... as the only adult and also had young children in the car, what did you do in terms of ‘evacuating to safety’? Hypothetical scenario but suddenly realising I have no idea what would be best....

I have two DCs, Preschool ages. I saw a car broken down today on the motorway (hard shoulder) and I suddenly realised I have no idea how I’d manage getting my kids to safety if I was on my own while we waited for a breakdown service.

Asked my DH - he said it would be a judgement call based on the situation which in my case, would probably be blind panic. Now I’m really overthinking it and can’t get it out of my head.

if You’ve ever been in this situation, what did you do? Or what do you think you would do? My worry is they won’t hold my hand, or try and wriggle out of my arms......

OP posts:

Flomper · 30/04/2018 18:04

This has happened to me twice with 2/3 kids in the car (one shit car, one blown tyre) Luckily both times I had an inkling it was going to happen so was in thr slow lane. First time they were 4 and 1. I got out by crawling over to the passenger side then basically picked them both up under my arms from the back door and took them as high up the embankment as we could go (absolute nightmare as was brambles). Then i crouched down and tucked them both in under my coat and called the AA, came fairly quickly. Quite scary. Second time was a bit better as the oldest was about 10 so helped with the 7y old and I took 3y old. Main problem was we didnt have coats on and it was freezing. Called AA and DP, he got there forst amd put them all in his car one at a time so we could get home and he waited for AA.

Mumofkids · 30/04/2018 18:09

It is scary. I broke down with 6 children on my own ages 6 months to 10yrs. You just have to calmly get them out the safe side and get them over the barrier to a place you can wait safely. I did not leave any in the car alone, I got them all out very seriously telling the ones who could understand how dangerous it was and to hold each other's hands. It's so noisy and we were right beside a steep slope and bridge so had to climb up out of the way.

NotMeNoNo · 30/04/2018 18:13

Starfish there isn't barrier on all the verge, so hopefully you'd find a gap. It's so hard but even if someone could walk 10 steps they would be safer than in a car. On the smart motorways the emergency refuges are now being designed with a gap in the barrier at one end so a wheelchair user can get to a safe place to wait.

bertielab · 30/04/2018 18:22

I have a triangle and I'd put hazards on -hard shoulder. Kids and dogs up and over verge as far away as possible from barrier -never go anywhere without multiple dog leads of all different shapes and sizes. Clips onto kids and dogs, if necessary can clips them all together -leads together etc.

Emergency clothes, coats, wellies, umbrellas, blankets, waterproofs, food and drink, torches, hi vis jackets etc are all in car and I'd throw it all up the bank and phone on mobile and wait.

Jaxhog · 30/04/2018 18:23

The police come out bloody quick if you're apparently in danger. Which you would be with kids.

I broke down on the M4 a few years ago. No kids (fortunately) But my alternator had gone, so no lights and in a dark stretch. The police were there before I'd called the breakdown people and got out of the car.

Terrifying how fast the traffic is, and the lorries straying onto the hard shoulder. I'd wouldn't have been able to get kids up the embankment either, as it was really steep. And really dark.(I now carry a torch)

PoisonousSmurf · 30/04/2018 18:27

When DD1 was 3yrs old and DD2 was only six months my husband managed to get us in trouble by not filling the tank!
We broke down in the worst spot imaginable, in between two merging motorways!
We had to get the girls out of the car in their car seats and put them in between the safety barriers (we were in the middle of nearly six lanes of traffic!) It was horrific!

Libi0closetomyheart · 30/04/2018 18:29

As others have said, I also keep a spare carrier in the car. When I travel with a friend's child, I'll have two that I can quickly use - one on the front and one on the back in case of emergency. There are many toddler and preschool size slings that will allow you to carry bigger children comfortably. A sling library can help you find the right one for you, and I'm a sling consultant myself so glad to help too if we are in the same area. You can check out my page Close to my Heart - NW London Slings
www.facebook.com/Close-to-my-Heart-NW-London-Slings-1274780352623337/

MonumentVal · 30/04/2018 18:46

Can someone confirm that there are still phones on the motorway? Someone up thread implied there weren't.
Haven't broken down on a motorway in 25 years thankfully (partly as old banger was too unreliable to tske on one...)

helpfulperson · 30/04/2018 19:45

If you can't get out of the car you need to make it as obvious as you can that this is a stopped car not in a lane. Park at a slight angle and make sure your hazards are on. If any of the party are able to get out of the car get the bonnet up and the boot.

The reason it is so dangerous is that people don't register you are broken down and pull onto the hard shoulder behind you because they think you are in the inside lane.

And please don't do what I often see people do which is get out of the car and then stand right next to it. Imagine how far the car will go if someone hits it. You need to be that far away.

starfishmummy · 30/04/2018 21:07

Ill have a look next time I use a motorway Nktme. I thought there were kast time I broke down on a motorway but that was years ago. In the snow!! (And just me )

zzzzz · 30/04/2018 21:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Zoflorabore · 30/04/2018 21:47

We were on our way home to Liverpool from Essex from my brothers wedding.
It was torrential rain and had just got on the M25 when car started making a terrible noise and was shaking everywhere.

Dp pulled onto the hard shoulder. I rang my dad. He told us to get out of the car and over the barrier as much safer than remaining in car.

We had 8 yr old ds who has ASD and 14 week old dd. We were soaked within minutes, police stopped and gave us blankets and we got the AA out which took hours.
We got home 12 hours later after being rescued by the AA and they took us home.

Police told us that many drivers are distracted by a vehicle on the hard shoulder and drive into them causing injury and death so always safer to get out of car.

Was not much fun feeding dd her bottle under a blanket on the embankment. We also had no money left and were starving and had eaten all of our food within a few hours. Total nightmare.

Ohyesiam · 30/04/2018 21:50

It’s incredibly noisy on the hard shoulder, you can’t have a normal conversation. I doubt little children would run towards the traffic.

Casz · 30/04/2018 21:56

Don't use a warning triangle on the motorway. (On an ordinary road it should be the width of a football pitch in front of the car so oncoming traffic sees the warning first.)

Hopefully, this thread will make at least one person aware to always carry coats in the car - and reins if your children are young enough to not follow instructions. (Please be that the judging of people using reins stops as it is so dangerous not to in some situations - although, sadly, I think it will take the high-profile death of an unreined toddler to change this attitude.)

itsallgravybaby · 30/04/2018 21:59

Yes I've broken down in the fast lane and it was terrifying.

999 straight away and they send someone to close the road behind you and pull you to the hard shoulder where you can arrange breakdown recovery

Llanali · 30/04/2018 22:11

I broke down in the fast lane on the A1M with a 4/5 day old baby. Horrendous. Pissing it down with rain, in winter.

Very dangerous, hungry baby (medically unable to breastfeed), only one pot of milk left and it was cold, post partum bleeding, lots of stitches, not my finest moment.

If you saw a woman sobbing in the central reservation years ago with a tiny child in a car seat, waiting for the police with a phone that got soaked and wouldn’t dial, that was me.

NotMeNoNo · 30/04/2018 23:42

There are still emergency telephones, on smart motorways they are in the refuges (emergency lay-bys) on other motorways just in the verge at intervals.

2andcountingtodate · 02/05/2018 11:46

I phoned police for a broken down family car in the inside lane. Everyone managed to emergency brake and I called the police using my voice car phone. Far too dangerous not to report.

I had a blow out on an A road while pregnant, thankfully pre Baby as there was nowhere safe to go. I was lucky that as it was so dangerous with a blind bend just ahead, there was patrolling in that area and my car was fixed quickly. I stayed by the car but if ds was there I don't know what else I could have done.

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