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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To avoid having a smear test

56 replies

Reel9 · 28/04/2018 20:09

I’m 26 and still haven to had a smear test.

I keep getting letters from my GP, and I know I’m a fool not to go as it’s better off be safe than sorry.

But a few years ago I was referred to the hospital for an examination regarding irregular bleeding. It turned out to be endometriosis, but before the diagnosis they tried to examine me. They couldn’t even use the tool to ‘open me up’ (I can’t remember the name of it) as it hurt me so much. They tried a smaller one and that was too much too. Because of this, I have avoided going as it was such an undignified, distressing and painful experience.

I’m not worried about the gynaecologist seeing me, it’s just the distress of the procedure.

I’ve read virgins don’t have to get smear tests which makes me wonder if I need one. I’m not a virgin, I’ve had one sexual partner, and he’s also only had one partner (me). So I’m wondering if it’s even possible for me to have the HPV virus?

Are there any women out there who DON’T have the test for whatever reason?

OP posts:
Notjustamam · 28/04/2018 20:15

All sexually active women should have smears. 1 partner or 1000 is irrelevant. It's uncomfortable, may hurt, but could save your life

gryffen · 28/04/2018 20:20

You could ask to be refered to a Gynae clinic who could perform the full check under day care surgery conditions- basically a mild relaxant due to anxiety over the pain etc.

It's not fun but can save your life so well worth having it done and quite common up in my area for those with endo.

traceyturnblatt · 28/04/2018 20:21

Explain to your GP or nurse about your previous experience and they may be able to reassure you.

Unfortunately it's a complete must- nobody likes to get it done but it could save your life

SluttyButty · 28/04/2018 20:21

Get the smear, I didn't think I'd have hpv but I do. I know a few people, myself included, who've had to go for colposcopys after having smears. Some like myself were fine, one who'd left hers thinking she was too young needed treatment. So yes get your smear done and explain to the nurse how distressed you are so they can book a longer appointment so you can go at your own pace comfortably.

MyLearnedFriend · 28/04/2018 20:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bowlofbabelfish · 28/04/2018 20:25

You really should do everything you can to go.

There are a number of things that can be done to make it more comfortable for you. The way you’re positioned is a big one (the let you knees fall apart position is very painful for many) they can use a paediatric speculum or they could in extreme cases prescribe you anlight sedative.

It’s possible you’re experiencing something like vaginismus which is making it difficult for you. That can be treated and it is important that you have smears. Over 90% of sexually active adults are exposed to various types of HPV in their lives. Also not all cancers are HPV triggered. And not all cervical issues are cancer based.

I would go back to your GP and start from the base that you want a smear but it’s currently un-doable for you and how can they help?

Bowlofbabelfish · 28/04/2018 20:26

Oh and yes, you could have been exposed to some types of HPV.

NotSinisterAtAll · 28/04/2018 20:26

I'm 10 yrs older than you and I've never had one. Exact same reasons as you (it's called a speculum). GP tried and nurses have tried. no one has a right to judge your medical choices so it's something you need to decide about.

OrangePeels · 28/04/2018 20:26

A friend of mine died age 28 of cervical cancer. She had only ever had one partner.
It’s worth the discomfort.
Explain how much it bothers you and get an extended appointment. You won’t be the first and you won’t be the last.

Celebelly · 28/04/2018 20:28

I'd really advise you to talk to your doctor and explore options. No matter how uncomfortable a smear is, it's guaranteed to be less uncomfortable than having undetected cell changes or, god forbid, cervical cancer. You won't be the first person they've seen with this problem.

Sparklesocks · 28/04/2018 20:28

Hi OP, sorry to hear you’ve had such a difficult experience.

There is evidence that HPV virus (of which some strands can cause cervical cancer) is higher if you have a high number of sexual partners/have sex from a young age, but that doesn’t mean you’re not at risk if you don’t meet this specific criteria. I think it would still be a risk to not have a smear, it might be you have pre cancerous cells which the doctors could catch early.

Could you maybe talk to your GP about your concerns and see if they can help?

summerlovingliz · 28/04/2018 20:29

Don't forget the nurses that do them are really well trained and really well used to all sorts of women/shapes etc. Explain in advance how you're feeling and they will be gentle. Hi and have it done, your life is more important than a little discomfort or even a lot, good luck

Hannah4banana · 28/04/2018 20:31

I've had 2 seriously abnormal smears and a lot of treatment. For 2 mins of uncomfort it could save your life. I'm so grateful in Scotland we are tested earlier!

StrugglingMumma · 28/04/2018 20:32

I find smear tests incredibly painful- even with the smallest speculum, but after finding out I had CIN3 abnormal cells which is the most severe on my first smear test at age 25. I knew something was wrong whilst waiting for the results, I was convinced I had cancer and ended up taking life insurance out.

Thankfully treatment was successful and the only treatment I have had since is a cervical stitch whilst pregnant to get me to full term.

I'm 31 years old and know two women locally who have died from cervical cancer before reaching the age of 28.

I know it's distressing but please go get it done. It could save your life!!

Eliza9917 · 28/04/2018 20:32

You can get a device that you use over a few months I suppose where they gradually get bigger to help you take a speculum. I don't know what it's called but that might be worth a discussion with your GP/nurse.

greathat · 28/04/2018 20:33

No one likesthem but they are so much better than the alternative and over very quickly

greenlavender · 28/04/2018 20:33

It's a terrible decision not to have a smear. Please reconsider.

lanbury · 28/04/2018 20:38

Obviously you're well aware why it's a good idea, but the one thing you need to remember is that you are in control. You have the right to say no and if you go ahead, you have the right to say stop. I only say this because when I was younger I felt forced into it and the whole not being in control (which is how it felt) spiralled into panic attacks, which obviously made the experience a whole lot worse. If you feel you want to go ahead then be honest and look to discuss the issues before even addressing the physical ones as often it goes hand in hand. Flowers

RomeoBunny · 28/04/2018 20:38

Right... can someone explain to me how a medical professional is unable to use a speculum on select individuals? They do not hurt. If they do then you have a medical condition on top of needing a smear. It may also suggest your hymen maybe still intact somewhere.

Also the smear it's self shouldn't hurt either. They are literally just swabbing your cervix for less than 2 seconds. That shouldn't hurt.

Is a lot of this just psychosomatic?

AlmostAJillSandwich · 28/04/2018 20:39

Eliza do you mean dilators?
And i'm 28, never had a smear either, but for really complex medical reasons (mostly mental health related but also some physical issue), i can't have one done at this time.
I am also a virgin, and there is definitely the mental side of it, that i don't want the first person seeing and poking around down there to be a stranger.

my2bundles · 28/04/2018 20:39

It's so sad that the awareness of Jade Goody s forgotten after a short period of time. Get a smear, yes it's uncomfortable it is for very one but 2 minutes of discomfort does save lives.

RomeoBunny · 28/04/2018 20:40

Speculums really aren't that big Confused

Bowlofbabelfish · 28/04/2018 20:42

Right... can someone explain to me how a medical professional is unable to use a speculum on select individuals?

Well I mean you can always do it, you just can’t do it without hurting and doing damage. Vaginismus for example would mean it was impossible to comfortably examine a patient.
The cervix is a delicate area - swabbing can be painful if done incorrectly.

I’ve had very different experiences with smears - done right they are quick and painless but I’ve had a couple that were done quite roughly and were rather unpleasant.

A good sympathetic practitioner, paediatric speculum, good positioning and taking it atcthe soeed the patient wants, with ongoing consent, is key here.

Bowlofbabelfish · 28/04/2018 20:44

Speculums really aren't that big confused

Can you really not conceive of the fact that a minority of patients may find the insertion of an object unpleasant, traumatic or triggering?

I don’t have any issue with smears personally but I hope I’m aware enough to realise that some women do, and that they need to be handled sympathetically.

Naughty1205 · 28/04/2018 20:44

If you can have sex, you'll manage with the speculum. Get some valium/relaxant from GP beforehand, honestly it's 10 seconds or less and not painful. I've had CIN 1 before (precancerous cells but lowest level) but smears are a walk in the park now. And yes I've had to have the virgin speculum also and 10mg valium but don't know what i was worried about looking back. You'll be fine.