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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not bother with Party Favours/Return Gifts

15 replies

WhistlingBrooks · 27/04/2018 12:36

For my son's 5th birthday I am inviting his school mates (all 28) and a few other friends of his. We have a hall booked along with an entertainer on the day. The party will be for two hours and will include a buffet meal as lunch.

Would it be okay to not bother with party favours/ return gifts?
Firstly, I am already close to hitting my budget with the hall/entertainer and food and I don't want the stress of organising these party bags. Would it be offensive as a parent to not get a party bag if your child was invited?

Looking to get an idea if I can get away without organising one.

OP posts:
isseywithcats · 27/04/2018 12:39

if your having a big birthday cake just buy cheap small bags and napkins and put a slice of cake in the bags for the kids to take home, thats what i did when my kids were party age and no one ever complained as kids have enough of the sort of small stuff that goes in party bags in their own homes , the kids are getting a party, an entertainer and food, thats enough

specialsubject · 27/04/2018 12:50

trip to Poundland. Party bags, napkins for 28 will cost you £4 (they come in packs of 20)

Stompythedinosaur · 27/04/2018 13:01

Absolutely not unreasonable, but you may find that a lot of the kids will expect one, and they signal the end of the party. Handing out a slice of cake or similar would probably be an easier option.

JeremyCorbynsBeard · 27/04/2018 13:05

I always hated it when my DCs came home with party bags. They always seemed to have a pencil and notebook which was too small to ever use, horrible sugary Haribo-type sweets, annoying punch balloon and a plastic toy which was either broken or discarded almost straight away.

Save your money, and as a PP suggested, wrap up a piece of birthday cake in a napkin.

ferriswheel · 27/04/2018 13:08

I have learned that its much easier to just do these small etiquette things than cope with not bothering. You just need to hand them something. It doesnt have to be much.

Loyaultemelie · 27/04/2018 13:18

My dd and her friends would be horrified, I and her friends parents would be delighted

Loyaultemelie · 27/04/2018 13:19

Apologies my grammar apparently disappeared in the last party bag!

honeylulu · 27/04/2018 13:23

Slice of cake, a few sweets, a balloon. Possibly small bottle of bubbles if you can stretch to it. Those are the only things the kids actually enjoy/use and the bonus is they are cheap! The other stuff is just clutter.

I tried not doing party bags one year - I did prewarn parents but there were still lots of disappointed small people. :(

Notso · 27/04/2018 13:33

YANBU but expect children to ask for them anyway.
I did a lucky dip type thing instead of party bags at one of DS2's parties. Each child got a toy and a bag of haribo wrapped up and still there were several who asked where their party bag was.

Imsosceptical · 27/04/2018 13:38

I always warn DD prior to a party not to expect a gift bag, as a parent I have absolutely no problem with you not providing one, they are pointless and generally go in the bin! When I pick DD from parties I reinforce the no party bags chat, most parents unfortunately feel they need to provide one so I don’t mind her accepting one but will not tolerate a tantrum if they don’t provide one and would most likely shake their hands and say well done forsticking to your principles!!!

reluctantbrit · 27/04/2018 13:39

At age 5 most would expect a party bag.

We did animal picture books, set of 10 for 10 pounds from TheBookPeople. Others did sweet cones, most cost around a quid.

Forget the plastic crap/bubbles/balloons, we drowned in them in Reception and Y1

hardtoplease · 27/04/2018 13:47

I think you could get away without a bag at 3 and 4 years but by 5 they make expect it unfortunately.

Someone had a thread about seeds to plant (with plant pot and soil) for a party bag the other day. Have to keep it separate from the cakeslice of course, but that is a cheap alternative:

Plant pots for instance... www.cherry-lane.co.uk/products/60-pack-growing-patch-6cm-fibre-seed-pots.html?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIl7z26rza2gIVwbTtCh1yuQUXEAQYAiABEgLqT_D_BwE

Or if you have any skills (drawing, baking, sewing) could you utilise those to make something?

Original poster
WhistlingBrooks · 27/04/2018 13:54

Thank you all for your comments. I can totally see how little ones will definitely expect it :)

Even my boy expects one, so I think I might just make that trip to Poundland and be done with it.

Loved the idea of plant pots. Very novel and educational and I am sure would teach kindness and patience.

OP posts:
Original poster
WhistlingBrooks · 03/05/2018 09:23

I have taken all your advice and now making loot bags for the kids in the party. Thank you all!

OP posts:
lunar1 · 03/05/2018 09:27

It's just easier isn't it, better than having loads of children milking around at the end just in case party bags make an appearance!

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