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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think she shouldn't have dropped me?

35 replies

MulanRouge · 26/04/2018 11:32

Friend suggested we go together to a local event this weekend. The event is running at a few different times. I told her I would love to, and told her the times I would be able to make. Friend said great, she'd get the tickets and confirm. She mentioned that she might invite a couple of other people along and I was fine with this.

She's just texted to say other friend can only make one time and it's one of the times I can't make and she's really sorry, she's going to go with this friend instead.

AIBU to think this is rude?

OP posts:
OliviaStabler · 26/04/2018 12:28

YANBU, best to reply something breezy like 'OK, I can't make that time but have fun' and then drop her like a hot brick. If she did this once, she'll do it again.

YimminiYoudar · 26/04/2018 12:29

She is not your friend

Smeddum · 26/04/2018 12:29

YANBU, best to reply something breezy like 'OK, I can't make that time but have fun' and then drop her like a hot brick. If she did this once, she'll do it again

This! It was a shitty thing to do to you OP.

pigmcpigface · 26/04/2018 12:32

Since the friendship is not deep or lengthy, I would reply with something like "Oh. OK. I'm a bit disappointed, because I was looking forward to going together, but understand that you have other priorities". And then distance yourself long term.

If it was a closer friend, I'd have more of a chat about it, but she sounds like someone on that acquaintance/friend border, who has now firmly put herself into the acquaintance box. Look on it as saving you a bunch of time and energy that you might have otherwise wasted on the friendship.

flowerslemonade · 26/04/2018 12:39

It's really rude. I'd say something about it.

RoundaboutSnail · 26/04/2018 12:49

It wasn't discussed as a group arrangement so no, there is no need to go with the majority of people who were asked to join in after the OP and "friend" had started planning.

MissionItsPossible · 26/04/2018 12:59

How rude. I'm petty and hold grudges so I'd act fake and like it doesn't bother me and next time she makes plans one-on-one with you eagerly go along with them, arrange to meet her someone (preferably difficult for her to get to) with no intention of ever actually going.

QueenofSerene · 26/04/2018 13:02

She sounds like she’s cherry picking her friends and it’s rude. I’d not bother with her in future if this is how she thinks “friendship” goes. She’s rude.

Mummyoflittledragon · 26/04/2018 13:41

Do you want to respond telling her you’re surprised/upset seeing as she made firm plans with you first? Or are you going to just gloss over it because you’re relatively new on the scene?

whiteradiator · 26/04/2018 13:51

That's very rude!!! I can't believe she invites you out and then drops you to pick someone else. She isn't a very good friend I would get rid of her from your friends list and focus on someone who does deserve you

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