Unashamed pity party -- sorry, bad week. I'll get over it. But also a genuine question.
I'm generally far, far happier being a single mum than I was married to a man who was abusive, lazy, drunk and controlling and generally made me unhappy. Wouldn't go back to it if I was paid. In fact I paid to get out of it.
But by God sometimes I'm so sick of having to be responsible for every last thing. Having to be mum and dad and everyone else. Having to pay for everything and organise everything and do a 60 hour week, mega stressful job on top of it. And getting no thanks from anyone, ever. I do have good friends and some support but my ex does minimal childcare and pays zero maintenance. I try to count my blessings and normally I can see the silver lining.
I have people I can vent to in real ilfe but I spend nine hours a day in an office full of people who on paper are my friends but in whom I actually can't really confide. I can't go out with them most of the time and I feel totally cut off from them as a result. Its the kind of environment where you're not encouraged to show your weakness at the best of times and don't feel I can talk to anyone about the acute stress and the constant treadmill of demands on me and its making me feel increasingly cut off and shut down.
I've made my bed and I have to lie in it. But I just wonder if others have been through this and come out the other side? Is there ever anything more to life than work, childcare and sleep? And do you ever get to the point where you can talk about it without being afraid of letting your guard down?