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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To pay a bus lane fine even though I was a passenger.

114 replies

LondonElle · 23/04/2018 19:07

Went to a concert last month in Cardiff.
My friend drove me and three other friends there and back ( we paid her petrol money)
Whilst driving through the city centre she inadvertently went into a bus lane therefore she was fined £50.
She has since asked that we all give her a tenner... is this a reasonable request do you think?

OP posts:

BeyondThePage · 23/04/2018 20:18

If my friends didn't offer to help out I'd

a. be mighty surprised
b. not be offering to drive again.

happinessischocolate · 23/04/2018 20:18

I'd pay, I frequently drive in cities and areas I'm not used to and even with, or should I say because of satnav it's bloody stressful and getting in the right lane can be a nightmare without worrying about bloody bus lanes. She's has my sympathy.

bella2bella · 23/04/2018 20:29

I'd happily pay it. Not your responsibility but a nice, friendly gesture. I've paid half a ticket before when a friend driving me parked in the wrong place by mistake. Granted I offered but I saw the ticket when she did so knew about it.

chocatoo · 23/04/2018 20:31

Good grief - of course you should all chip in! It would have cost you a lot more to go on the train and you were in the position of being able to have a drink at the concert as she was the driver - it's not just the cost of the fuel, it's the convenience of her picking you up and you not having to drive or worry about where you parked your car, etc. etc....

I also assume you passengers were having a lovely carefree chat whilst she was battling her way through unfamiliar territory - or were you all giving her helpful directions (in which case you should also take part responsibility for where she ended up).

As for being unlikely to chose to travel with her again, if you don't chip in I think that is unlikely to be a concern as she is highly unlikely to offer!

Leeds2 · 23/04/2018 20:32

Personally, I would pay the £10. If I had incurred the fine, I wouldn't ask any passengers to contribute.

TheJoyOfSox · 23/04/2018 20:33

The driver pays. It was the driver who pulled into the bus lane.

Ariela · 23/04/2018 20:33

I think it is perfectly reasonable to split the fine. She has driven from your home town to a place she is not so familar with, and inadvertently driven in a bus lane. Any of you could have done the same, and if Cardiff is like Reading there are plenty of random locations for bits of bus lane that it is VERY easy to stray into - I followed a bus slowly, in heavy traffic, right behind it, in a single lane and did not see one sign that said all traffic to go left, because it was about 10 ft up in the air on the left, and from where I was behind the bus only actually visible for about 2 seconds. Had I not been behind the bus doing a very slow crawl along, I'd have sen the sign over the top of the cars - but it was a double decker. Last time I'd driven in Reading and for 40 years before that you could drive straight on.

AnnieAnoniMouser · 23/04/2018 20:35

I got a bus lane fine in Oxford, although my passenger was navigating I’d never dream of asking her to pay the fine. I was driving, it was MY responsibility. I didn’t even tell her I’d got it.

If I offer to drive others somewhere, it doesn’t absolve ME of the responsibility of driving within the law, whether I would have been there or not if I hadn’t offered to drive.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 23/04/2018 20:36

I don't think she was cheeky to ask. How else would you have known? It’s not like she’s invoiced you.
Agree about Cardiff, btw. Buggers for fines!

Bumbledumb · 23/04/2018 20:43

I live in Cardiff, and this is the junction that caught me. I wouldn't be surprised if it was the same one which your friend was caught at.
There is space for about 6-7 cars between the end of the bus lane and the traffic light. There is a camera right at the end of the bus lane.

All I wanted to do was get into the correct lane to turn left and get out of the main carriageway. There were already a number of cars queued up to turn so I ended up crossing into the end of the bus lane inadvertently.

Personally I would share the fine as she was doing you a favour and I doubt she incurred the fine on purpose.

To pay a bus lane fine even though I was a passenger.

OlennasWimple · 23/04/2018 20:43

If I was the driver, I wouldn't ask. However, I would have offered as the passenger

This

SevenStones · 23/04/2018 20:51

If my friends didn't offer to help out I'd

a. be mighty surprised
b. not be offering to drive again.

This.

AnnieAnoniMouser · 23/04/2018 20:51

I would OFFER if it was my friend too, same with a parking fine if neither of us had noticed a sign or something. But the keyword there is OFFER.

I think it’s really rude that she has asked them to pay for something which is actually her responsibility. She should have just sent a message (as someone else said) ‘Bugger, I can’t believe I got a bloody bus lane fine when we went to x concert, I wonder if it’s worth appealing?!’ and left it at that. If people wanted to contribute great, but if not that’s fair enough too.

livingontheedgeee · 23/04/2018 20:53

I don't think it's your responsibility as the passenger but it's your responsibility as a friend. She drove you and accidentally went into a bus lane. Cough up and stay friends.

Mummyoflittledragon · 23/04/2018 20:55

I’d far rather pay £10 than let my friend, who’d kindly driven me around pay the full whack.

GabsAlot · 23/04/2018 21:02

i dunno is she usually sponging off people or is genuine

maybe shes skint right now

lalalalyra · 23/04/2018 21:05

If I was the driver, I wouldn't ask. However, I would have offered as the passenger

I agree with this.

It's bloody rude, as the driver, to ask your passengers to pay imo.

iheartmichellemallon · 23/04/2018 21:07

For the sake of the friendship, I'd pay £10 - it's not a lot & she was doing you all a favour.

Athrawes · 23/04/2018 21:07

If you can afford it, pay. Help out a mate who helped you.

Pluckedpencil · 23/04/2018 21:34

Can't believe all the people saying she is being cheeky. Easy to not making driving mistakes when you're not doing the driving isn't it?! But someone does have to take that risk....no good deed goes unpunished! Just give her a tenner, she did you a big favour and now you owe her one back.

WeirdyMcBeardy · 23/04/2018 22:13

I think she's a cheeky cow. Her car, her fine. The only way itmwould be reasonable is if someone navigated her into that lane.

weneedtotalk · 23/04/2018 22:33

@bumbledumb
Wouldn’t surprise me if it was, Newport Road is a nightmare if you’re not used to it; normal roads turn into bus lanes, then back, then back again & its soooo busy all the time. The signage in Cardiff Centre is ridiculous tbf.

weneedtotalk · 23/04/2018 22:35

I would offer to pay, did she drive you from far away?
Even with petrol money, she’s done a massive favour by driving you there so you can relax whilst she has to deal with the stress of navigating an unknown busy city. Think what a taxi would have cost.

knittingdad · 23/04/2018 22:42

My main worry about this is that I would then feel unable to relax if said friend ever drove me anywhere ever again, because I would feel like I was on the hook for a fine if they made another mistake.

That would make me a terrible passenger.

KeepServingTheDrinks · 23/04/2018 22:46

Completely agree with Pluckedpencil, although I do agree with others that it's quite cheeky to ask. However, I would have offered once I was made aware.

Occasionally at work someone goes out and gets nicer sandwiches than we usually have. Last time, the one who went got a ticket. The rest of us chipped in a fiver each. She still had to pay the majority of the fine, but it was much cheaper for her than it would have been. We weren't in the car with her, but she was doing us a favour and we wanted to acknowledge that and lessen the sting a bit for her.
That's what you do with people you are fond of, isn't it?

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