To be annoyed by judgement when giving my son “junk food” that he needs?

[TammySwansonTwo]

One of my boys has a medical condition that causes dangerously low blood sugar. If I’m at home I have prescription methods for treating this but its a faff, requires mixing etc.

If we are out and he starts showing symptoms, I tend to give whatever I can pick up from a corner shop which could be full sugar premixed Ribena if they have it (but Ribena are pulling full sugar versions), a couple of sweets, lemonade or coke, followed by some carbs like breadsticks, until I can get him home and manage it more effectively.

I’ve only had to do this a handful of times and every single time without fail I have people tutting, staring or making audible comments. He’s small for his age so looks probably about 12-13 months old when he’s actually 18 months old. Obviously I wouldn’t normally give these things to a child of that age but needs must.

Part of me wants to explain to these judgemental people that the sugar is protecting him from potential brain damage but frankly my son’s medical issues are his business, not theirs.

AIBU to think it should occur to people that there may be a reason for it, or is it not something that would normally cross people’s minds?

Don't give him coke!!! The caffeine

Thing is, monkey, there are times when a can of coke could save his life and there isn't anything else available.

Must be hard, could you carry sugar sachets and add to drinks?

I didn't read properly sorry.
Didn't realise there were issues with the type of sugar.
People can be so judgemental you are correct
Even if you know why you are giving something to your child or doing something and people are being rude it still hurts.
Someone shamed me before for using a disabled shower and I was so upset and shocked I cried and told my husband. Then my humiliation changed to rage and I went back to the shower to confront the woman who had made comments about me being fine. I told her how it was and explained my situation to her and told her to stop being so judgemental and thinking she always knows what's going on.
Sometimes it's not the right time to confront people and you shouldn't have to explain yourself to anyone.
I'm sorry you have to go through this.

TammySwansonTwo-It is difficult - lucozade used to be the drink of choice but not enough sugar these days sadly (although the rest of the country probably prefers less sugar, it does make treating random hypos on the fly much more difficult!). Obviously no one wants to pump a toddler full of caffeine but if it’s that or a hospital admission, potential coma, brain damage etc then it’s not much of a choice! Obviously it’s something I avoid unless strictly necessary

Has your doctor recommended you 'pump your toddler full' of refined sugars and 'caffiene' to avoid a diabetic coma?

Monkey I'm sure OP knows what she's doing. The type 1 child my DS is friends with has always had to have coke to combat her hypos, since they were in nursery together. At age 11 she has to have a full can almost every morning break now to combat her dips.

My son has a condition where he had surgery on his oesophagus and a consequence of that is that food can get a bit stuck.

I have that too and it's so freaking painful. Fizzy drinks really do help best. I don't understand why coke seems to be the absolute best (acid breaks the food down quicker?) but it really is. for your DS.

My DS is small for his age and underweight. His paediatrician recommended he go back to full fat milk and carb and fat heavy meals (so things like pasta, rice, proper butter, pies, nuts and seeds for eg.). She said a bit of junk food or a hot chocolate with marshmallows when out every now and then wouldn't be a problem either.

No word of a lie, I got him a hot chocolate to take away from Starbucks once and we bumped into another school parent who we don't know well. They actually questioned me "You let him drink COFFEE?!" [insert pearl clutch] I replied no, it's hot chocolate and they visibly relaxed and said "Oh that's ok then!" Well Karen* no one fucking asked you, and I'm surprised she wasn't more concerned about the shit ton of sugar in it tbh. Have overheard other people commenting on "little kids being allowed coffee" too. The funny thing is he actually bloody loves coffee thanks to his DF, and I'm really strict about not letting him have it (he gets it when he sees my ex unfortunately). But people see a child that looks about 9 with a Starbucks cup and just assume.

OP YANBU, unfortunately kids who need things like this are in the minority and people judge based on the majority. It sucks but you just have to grow rhino hide!

I have to admit if I saw a small child drinking a can of coke I would be taken aback and my first thought wouldn't be about blood sugar levels. I would never say anything out loud though and once I pulled my judgy pants out my bum then It would cross my mind that actually sometimes there's a genuine need for things like that.

A sugary drink would be the best thing (if the glucose tablets are a problem, you can kind of dissolve them in your mouth but he's young) as they are the fastest way to get sugar in and absorbed.

Chocolate etc isn't as good as it's slower. So sorry you've had people commenting, ignore them.

I had gestational diabetes through pregnancies and had to inject insulin from 9ish weeks so I got a lot of practice with foods. I had a lot of hypos at first while I adjusted and I learned (from consultants, diabetic groups and experience) that drinks are the fastest. Followed up by carbs of course.

I hope you manage to stabilise things in the future, it's so difficult, must be especially so in a child so young.

www.diabetes.co.uk/shop/glucogel-triple-pack-3-x-25g-tubes

What about glucogel op? Handy to have in the changing bag, and clearly not junk food. If your dc is at risk you need to not be relying on a shop being local whenever he has a hypo.

You are confusing me. I get you need to give him sugar quickly...but one minute I have the impression you are buying him junk food urgently - and then it’s cracking open a can of coke for him urgently on a moving bus! You also say it’s only happened a couple of times - but then you give lots of examples of the junk food you have had to urgently feed him.
Then you also say you’ve only had two comments but the happens all the time?
I hate mixing medicine and I’m guessing carrying it around just Incase would be a pain - why not talk to the doctor about some transportable options - it would also be free on the Nhs if you are in the uk.
As an aside - they use coke to clean things! Perhaps a bad option for a small child. Even teeth in his gum could be affected by this - ie you could be damaging his developing adult teeth.

My daughter is disabled, for the past 14 years I've experienced people in public making comments on her behaviour, her size ( too big to be in a 'pushchair'), her looks, my parenting..... just ignore.... you get used to it & ignore the entitled, ignorant comments.

My daughter has an unsafe swallow and is tube fed. She can manage some 'bite & dissolve' melt-in-the-mouth type foods, so she can have chocolate buttons, and totally smooth, thick purées.

I imagine some people have a good old hoik of the judgy pants when they see me, her brother and her dad tucking into chips on the beach and DD merrily sucking the contents out of a sachet of tomato ketchup.

Luckily I stopped caring long ago.

I said it’s happened a handful of times in public - it’s only in the last week we’ve gotten the right prescription for his glucose sachets (the consultant had to write to the GP, the GP had never heard of it and had to write back, it was a whole pallaver!). My consultants advice in the meantime if he showed symptoms or dropped below a certain level was to give Ribena if i could get the full sugar version or any drink with enough of a ratio of carbohydrate (at least 15%). As I mentioned previously, recently loads of drinks have announced they’ve changed their recipes due to the sugar tax so often there’s very little available - the time I bought and gave him coke, it was literally the only drink they had that would have worked. And it’s not like I’m giving him the whole can. Clearly it’s not ideal, but I don’t think people grasp the danger of hypoglycaemia.

The portable option we’ve been given (tubes of gel) makes him vomit, and I’ve been told only to give it if he can’t or won’t drink - the first approach is either the sachets now I have them, which I really couldn’t mix on the move, or Ribena / some other high sugar drink, whatever is available. That’s literally the medical advice I have in writing! To be honest the care he’s received hasn’t been particularly wonderful or helpful but we are seeing his consultant again in a couple of weeks for the first time in months so I can ask her more about the available options amongst other things.

My DD has issues with blood sugars and like your son can drop v low v quickly. She has a gastrostomy which means it's easier to get sugar in but I found that the glucojuice is much better than the gel and less likely to make her sick- you could mix it with normal squash as well.

But yes dealing with people's stares/comments isn't pleasant and people can be thoughtless- suggesting that we tube feed because we're too lazy and if we just starve her she'll eat (she dies eat orally but not enough to keep her sugars up) or that it's 'mean' to test her blood sugars or that it's unpleasant to see her being tube feed (which is wierd because all you can see is s tube going under her t-shirt attached to a bag so really nothing to see!) Try not to take it personally and ignore if you can, comments usually get a very blunt reply

Op, as demonstrated by a few on this thread, some people haven't got a fucking clue.

Deep breath and ignore.

My consultants advice in the meantime if he showed symptoms or dropped below a certain level

If you don't mind me asking, how do you know if he has droppes below a certain level. Is it by observation or some kind of test?

DS1 also has CF-related diabetes. DD once had D & V, she said everything thing looked fuzzy, I vaguely remembered something about low blood sugar affecting eyesight, asked DS1, he agreed and recommended apple juice. I've been on other threads mentioning that he drinks Coke if he has a dip, lots of comments about "why can't he eat something sugary?" from people who don't know about diabetes. Because a drink is quicker.

Could he have dates?

Does anyone remember lucazade tablets? They would be enough sugar for blood sugar levels and no one would notice.

Alpine We have a monitor that can test his blood sugar and ketone levels. Unfortunately he doesn’t often show symptoms, and when he does he’s usually already very low, but I’m learning to spot very subtle things that could suggest he’s starting to drop, as it’s much easier to get him stable from a higher starting point if that makes sense!

Dates would be no use for a serious hypo. They are too fibrous.

Jam and honey are pretty good alternatives to Glucagel, which is rank. You could carry a squeezy honey bottle and squeeze it into his mouth.

Try to ignore the busybodies. Or shame them, by telling them what's really going on.

@ittakes2 What utter rubbish, the adult teeth do not come into contact with the coke, there’s no reason they’d be affected. Children get tooth decay when they are repeatedly given sugary drinks and their teeth are not brushed. I think that is very different than a small amount of coke for the OP’s

Sorry pressed too soon. A small amount of coke for an 18 month old (who would be seriously at risk if he doesn’t have it) is hardly irresponsible parenting.

If the glucogel makes him vomit, then how about carrying what you need to mix up the sachet on the go? A bottle of water, and a second empty bottle with the level premarked, so you know how much fluid to add.

TammySwansonTwo-Alpine We have a monitor that can test his blood sugar and ketone levels. Unfortunately he doesn’t often show symptoms, and when he does he’s usually already very low, but I’m learning to spot very subtle things that could suggest he’s starting to drop, as it’s much easier to get him stable from a higher starting point if that makes sense!

Ah I see now, yes. Must be quite stressful enough

Rather than the glucoboost which is not very nice for a toddler would your doctor consider trying polycal drinks they are ready mixed and come in a couple of flavours so could be a good on the go solution, its what we use at the hospital i work at to bring people up from hypos