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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you make your child go on school camp?

16 replies

malificent7 · 20/04/2018 10:45

More of a wwyd. Dd 9 is in year 5. Camo in year 6 sounds great. She disnt want fo go as she hates geights and outdoors activities, highwires etc.
Although the kids can do these there are plenty of other less scary activities.
Most of her friends are going bar one or two.
Aibu to think she will regret it if she dosnt go. It is expensive which is another factor.
Should i sign her up anyway or leave it...she will be conflicted when all her friends are excited to go!

OP posts:
Original poster
malificent7 · 20/04/2018 10:47

Camp even. She did go go xamp in year 3. Dreaded it but loved it. Not bothered about going again it would seem. Different camp though...no high wires etc. I just think it will be good for her.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 20/04/2018 10:58

I didn’t go on mine and I have never regretted it.

I would let her decide but make it clear that it’s her decision and if she regrets it you can’t do anything

MamaLupine · 20/04/2018 11:01

My DD isn't going on hers this year. She's been in the past and didn't like it. But mainly she's not going because she CBA with all the ongoing drama and fall-outs over bunk and room sharing.

Original poster
malificent7 · 20/04/2018 11:02

sorry about typos!

OP posts:
DailyWailEatsSnails · 20/04/2018 11:10

I made DS go & it was a disaster. DS was roomed with a child he didn't know & he felt embarrassed about. He had a strop & refused to cooperate with adults (should explain school had a part in the terrible rooming decision, too). Had to collect DS after 90 minutes. Lost deposit. Never doing that again.

Talith · 20/04/2018 11:13

You can't win with these things. Sent DC1 in year 4. Miserable and homesick. When another one came round in year 6 they begged not to go so I said ok. Then all their friends were on the trip and DC was left with the bullies for a week. Miserable and bullied!

DC2 is adamant they don't want to go on any and I'm not inclined to push them at primary tbh.

Stompythedinosaur · 20/04/2018 11:25

I wouldn't force them but I woukd strongly encourage them to go. I think there's a good chance of them having a good time when they're there.

Can you offer that if they give it a try you will pick them up if they hate it? Maybe get the school to agree with this plan?

I'd be worried about my dc missing out on a bonding experience.

ittakes2 · 20/04/2018 11:32

For me it would depend on how long they are away for. They won't know they don't like it until they try it.

Coyoacan · 20/04/2018 13:49

I wouldn't force her.

chloesmumtoo · 20/04/2018 13:58

No definitely wouldn't make them go. In my view they either want to or don't. Is up to them.

Ivorbig1 · 20/04/2018 14:00

No. Why would you ? She has her whole life to have adventures with, she doesn’t want to go.

BarbarianMum · 20/04/2018 14:05

I will have this situation w ds2 next year. Am very tempted to make him go because I know he'll have a great time and would totally regret it if he didn't. But maybe he needs to learn that the hard way, so may let him decide. Either way it will be a total pain with him oscillating between wanting to and not. Sad

Panickedfran · 20/04/2018 18:43

I wouldn’t make her go. Even if she did enjoy the week, she’d have a year between then and now dreading it constantly, and I think that far outweighs the potential - but far from certain - benefits of going.

And those sorts of activities are a nightmare for some children, there may be other, more gentle activities available, but there would be peer pressure to go on the zip wire/go abseiling, and they might laugh at her if she was too scared.

Plus, who is rooming with who can cause massive friendship problems.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery · 20/04/2018 18:47

I was that child- not outdoorsy at all, hated heights and sports activities. I would have dreaded something like that. I'm glad my parents never pushed me into doing that stuff. Whatever your DD is into (music, drama, science, whatever) I am sure there must be camps, clubs etc where she could get the social benefits of a residential but in a way that feels comfortable for her.

pilates · 20/04/2018 18:53

No I wouldn’t.

MoonlightKissed · 20/04/2018 19:00

I wouldn't force a child to go, but I would definitely strongly encourage and paint it in a positive light.

My daughter went to the Year 6 camp and had an absolute ball of a time. Yes, there were a couple of activities she was worried about - one of them she actually did in the end, the other she didn't - there was no teasing, no forcing.

The rooming with other children wasn't ideal - she was roomed with a couple of girls she didn't like, but she survived it, and enjoyed time with the girls she did like. Sometimes in life we don't always like everyone, but we have to learn to get along/tolerate them, and not to allow their presence to stop us doing great stuff.

I encourage my daughter to grab all lifes opportunities as they come, and live life to the full.

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