Objecting to weird people lecturing my 3yo about not asking their name??
flightattendant · 12/05/2007 12:57
We were in town this morning and sat on a wall for a rest. some women walked past (elderly and middle aged daughter). DS (3) is in a phase of talking to strangers, when I'm there. I've tried to stop him but usually people just smile or talk to him, he's really sociable.
Anyway he says to them, politely, as they pass, 'Hello, what are your names?'
The younger one turns round and says, @you really shouldn't ask people questions like that, we are nice ladies but we aren't going to tell you our names'.
DS looks upset and comes and puts his head on my lap.
Elderly woman then asks DS how old he is. I look at them both and say, 'You really shouldn't ask people questions like that'. DS continues to hide his little face, he's totally ashamed.
Younger woman doesn't go away but continues sprouting about 'I hope he doesn't feel rejected, but I don't think it's a good idea to ask people their names...blah blah...like I am not aware of the dangers of talking to strangers.
Is it me having odd notions about children not fully understanding the usual social inhibitions, or could she just have smiled at him and said something like 'I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours'..? After all I was right there and FGS he is TINY!
I can't work ut why she was so bloody threatened by it.( maybe this thing with the little girl who has gone missing, but I doubt it...)
flightattendant · 12/05/2007 13:06
Wish I could stop him but he won't listen. I do worry that he'll get himself into trouble somehow or mainly, annoy people - but he is pretty incorrigible. Any ideas?
(Probably why it upset me so much - I know it's not really Ok but he is SO sociable - little Gemini, which makes me believe in all that astrology cr*p - he can't get enough of other people)
flightattendant · 12/05/2007 13:14
Very sweet - I'm starting to think I must be very boring, as he won't just walk and talk next to me, but goes and 'adopts' some other family walking nearby - to their surprise! I keep calling him back but he is far too interested in finding out about them.
It really could happen, what you said!
rattleskuttle · 12/05/2007 13:23
my dd, 3, is the opposite. she won't talk to strangers and i'd love her to be more chatty. perhaps those women he spoke to are from net curtain twitching land where no one speaks directly to anyone. maybe they found your ds' directness difficult. but that's their problem, not his, isn't it?
fuzzywuzzy · 12/05/2007 13:28
I think your ds sounds adorable, I wouldn't discourage it he'll grow out of it, the women were mad..... reminds me of a little boy who decided to have conversation with me on a flight out to Dubai once, his dad came thundering down the aisle apologising profusely, I told him his son was lovely and I didn't mind at all speaking to such a wonderfully articulate little boy.....
flightattendant · 12/05/2007 13:46
Thanks, I feel so much better now! Most people seem not to mind at all and some really feel flattered at being approached by the little chap - I was quite proud that today I managed to stick up for him, as often I'm not sure and tend to apologise for it (usually people laugh).
Think I need some kind of lead for him though, just in case...! no news on that little girl I suppose yet?
sorkycake · 12/05/2007 14:22
My Dd is 5 and frequently does this still.
I don't discourage her because I want her to be confident with coversing with people of all ages, but then I'm somone who says good morning to complete strangers when walking to the shops so she probably gets it from me. She isn't ever out without me or Dh but does understand not to do it when we are not there, but that's in part due to worry that she'll hold them hostage verbally.
Leave him to it he's learning valuable social skills and you were right to reprimand the fools
NotQuiteCockney · 12/05/2007 20:00
And it's hardly like a three-year-old could be expected to understand that age can be a delicate issue!
My DS1 is, and was, a bit like this. I never did anything about it, why would I? Now, at 5.5, he's still very happy to take up with anyone. He knows there are situations (like shops) where he has to stay near me, or where I've asked him to be, and situations (like playgrounds or the swimming pool or a party) where as long as he stays in a specified area, he can do what he likes.
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