Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To get a dog for my Grandads benefit?

63 replies

TartanDr3ams · 12/04/2018 13:35

Short backstory..

After my grandma passed away my grandad took up walking and quit smoking to try and better his own health. Started as mainly trips to the library and such.
My auntie had a new puppy at the time. 12 weeks after getting said puppy it came out that her husband had a second family so he left her with the dog and 2 kids. She had to up her hours so my grandad took on the dog during the day and took him home in the evenings. He would walk milessss! He doted on that dog. We bought him a cheap mobile phone and off he went for miles each day with Monty.
Unfortunately 11 years on Monty got renal cancer and had to be put to sleep.
My grandad still tries to walk but says he has much less motivation to do so without the dog. He doesnt want to adopt/buy a new dog cause hes getting on a bit (although still fully able atm) and hes no experience of night times with dogs and worries about the full time prospect. He always, however, jumps at the chance to dog-sit when his neigjbours are away etc.

Me and my DP bought a house 9months ago and had always said we would probably get a dog in our second year. He works shifts and is home during the day every second week and week 5 in a 6 week rolling rota (so home during the day 4 in every 6 weeks) i work 9-5. Im home every night from 6 and DP is home every night from midnight.

Would it be at all unreasonable to move the dog plan forward and let my grandad have him/her during the day when DP is at work? I know to some this would seem an easy yes/no decision, but i worry ive forgot something and would really like to get this right.

Btw, grandad only lives a 10min walk away from ours so getting dog to him and back would be easy

OP posts:
WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo · 12/04/2018 13:38

Who would look after the dog during the days if your grandad wasn't able to?

Would it be more practical for him to sign up to one of those "borrow my dog" type websites?

Floralnomad · 12/04/2018 13:40

Sounds like an ideal situation , he gets a daytime companion , you get a nighttime companion and the dog has company all the time . I suppose the only issue is what happens if something happens to grandad would you be able to afford daycare or a walker ?

SingleAgainThen · 12/04/2018 13:41

I think it sounds ideal but then I’d have 10 labradors if I could afford to so probably the wrong person to ask!

Jaxhog · 12/04/2018 13:44

Suggest he might want to be a socialising volunteer for guidedogs for the blind or a hearing aid dog? That's a much shorter commitment, and they are always looking for people to help.

I think the dog-share with you is also a good idea, providing you're prepared to look after the dog full time if becomes unable to do that. If so, consider adopting an older dog.

MissMarplesBloomers · 12/04/2018 13:47

Sounds like a perfect solution, maybe a not so large dog, preferably one rehomed from a family so you know what they need in terms of walking etc, or were you thinking of a puppy ?

As long as you have a local dog walker to be back up if either party couldn't do one day or to give Grandad a break it could work wrll!

Good luck 😁

Original poster
TartanDr3ams · 12/04/2018 13:48

We did look into local groups for him but theres nothing in our area for such and he cant travel far except on foot. He looked into dog walking in the area but theres already quite a few dog walkers (which we would be able to pay for should he not be able to have said dog during the day for whatever reason at any time)

OP posts:
TrickyD · 12/04/2018 13:48

I'd be a bit wary about dogs and grandparents. For some insane reason, my DB gave our DM a puppy for her 80th birthday. Totally unasked for. It started out as 'You'll look after him when I'm on holiday , won't you Tricky?" Which swiftly turned into "If you and MrTricky ever want to go away I will look after the dog".

We became dog owners. Needless to say we adored him, even the cat seemed fond of him and we were devastated when his little heart gave out. (Now having a quiet snivel)

Original poster
TartanDr3ams · 12/04/2018 13:50

We are looking at rehoming a dog rather than buying a puppy, young still, but not brand new puppy. We have multiple breeds in mind, but if we go for it, grandad will also have input in decision of dog.

OP posts:
RafikiIsTheBest · 12/04/2018 13:55

Sorry for your loss Tricky, but that seems a very different situation. You were lumbered with a (albeit lovely) dog that you were unaware of. OP is saying her and her DP would love a dog and wondered if they should bring it forwards in order to get her lovely local grandad a walking companion sooner rather than later if he so chooses to do so. But I get how you feel. I'm the person in the family that often gets given pets no one else wants like they are doing me a favour.

I'd gently approach the subject with your grandad. If he would like a new pup to take for daily walks then that sounds great, since you have already said you can cope with dog walkers etc if grandad can no longer continue for any reason.

ShinyShooney · 12/04/2018 14:03

What would happen to the dog if your grandad is unable to have him when your DP is working? Or if granddad got sick or went on holiday?

UpstartCrow · 12/04/2018 14:11

If your grandad is on board it seems like the best solution for all of you.

Original poster
TartanDr3ams · 12/04/2018 14:15

shiny as mentioned above we are in a position to pay for dog walkers if need be. Theres a charity near by that do pay as you go,no need to book day care sessions. I only know so much cause i have recently enquired about my grandad going there, but they have a volunteer waiting list as long as my arm.

OP posts:
mrsjoyfulprizeforraffiawork · 12/04/2018 14:37

Sounds a great idea - if your granddad gets ill or goes away, there are usually home boarders around who will board the dog in their home or, as you've said, dogwalkers if the dog has to stay all day at your own home while you are working. I expect your granddad will be very pleased about this as long as he understands that you can make contingency plans if he is unable sometimes to do it. If you are in the South, I recommend Battersea for finding the right (for you) youngish rescue dog.

lollipopjones · 12/04/2018 14:42

Sounds like a great idea, OP. Just remember dogs are a lifetime commitment so 10+ years of vets bills and they need to be walked every day come rain or shine. And what about holidays? As long as you have considered everything then go for it!

Chrys2017 · 12/04/2018 14:43

Your plan is to let your granddad look after the dog during the day when your husband is at work? But, that is only two weeks out of every six weeks. So that doesn't seem like much dog time for granddad.

Otherwise it would be a good plan.

Excited101 · 12/04/2018 14:46

Sounds perfect op. I’m sure the lack of a cat sped up my Grandma’s demise and I wish we’d have found a way to get her another one as soon as her last one passed away. She needed something to look after.

IrianOfW · 12/04/2018 14:52

Sounds ideal to me. My dad lost his last dog 9 years ago and his mental health took a dive. We got a dog about a year later - something we had been discussing for ages - and while it took dad a while to accept ddog as he still missed HIS dog, in time he came to love him. He is 86 now and quite frail but his face lights up whenever ddog comes to visit. My dad can't walk very well these days si he can't take ddog out which is a shame, If you granddad can that is even better. Good luck.

BTW good idea to rehome older dog as puppies are like inviting a little tornado into your life!

pigsDOfly · 12/04/2018 14:53

Sounds like a lovely idea as long as granddad's up for it and his health is still good enough.

I got my dog when I retired and having her means I have to get out and walk each day; although I'm keener to walk than she is sometimes, especially in rough weather.

Original poster
TartanDr3ams · 12/04/2018 14:53

Thanks everyone. Were gonna pop in for a cuppa after work and speak to grandad about it.

I know a dog is a huge commitment, but a dog was always in our future plans - just maybe in a year or so if we were sole caring for him/her.

Sorry chrys i worded that bit quite badly.. i explained DPs rota to explain that theres not that often that no one will be home, but ofcourse grandad could choose as many days as he wishes during the day to have the pooch. Theres only 2 weeks in every 6 we NEED alternate arrangements should grandad not be able to for any reason is probably a better way to word it.

OP posts:
Chrys2017 · 12/04/2018 15:05

In that case it sounds ideal, and what a wonderful thing to do.

Shizzlestix · 12/04/2018 15:59

Careful if you go to a big name rescue. They’re funny about rexhomjng to anyone who works full time. Some will not allow you through the doors if they know you work. Might be better to say dog is for grandad. You should all op along to your local rescue and see what takes your eye.

Original poster
TartanDr3ams · 13/04/2018 07:31

For anyone who may be following. Grandad is over the moon! His single only concern was that my auntie sometimes took the piss and expected him to pay for Montys food. We cleared up that we dont expect him to pay for anything and all food, toys, treats, poo bags etc will be supplied by us. We called our local imdependant rescue centre and DP is gonna bring grandad to meet me after work and go straight there for a chat and a look. Im only at work til 11 today so ill update you later this afternoon

OP posts:
MyOtherProfile · 13/04/2018 07:35

That sounds like a brilliant solution all round. Looking forward to hearing how you get on.

FranticallyPeaceful · 13/04/2018 07:42

A dog helped both my ex-gramp in law and my dad SO MUCH after their wives passed away.
They’re a big commitment but the love and friendship everybody will get from them will pay you back a hundred fold

fourpawswhite · 13/04/2018 07:43

Sound like a perfect plan OP.

Not quite the same but u have lots of dogs and my retired parents love to "help" on a Saturday morning. We go for a walk and they take one each......they have never had dogs and they are so sweet in their waterproofs trundling along beside me. In reality I walk them all every other day but it gets them out for a walk and gives us time to catch up.

They do so much childcare for my sister so I think they see this as helping meGrin

It's certainly been really good for them both.