To get a dog?

[2quidfalafels]

I live with my boyfriend in London. We both have full time 9-5 jobs and REALLY want a dog. We've discussed what breeds we like at length and agree 100%.

Only trouble is our landlord isn't keen - I assume this is because the flat we're in is furnished by her and she doesn't want any scratches or nibbles on her furniture, which is fair enough.

My office allows employees to bring their dogs in, a few people do and everyone is happy with it. My boyfriend will almost definitely be moving offices to a co-working space that allows dogs this year. We're total homebodies so the dog would never be left at home unattended for more than an hour, we would take it basically everywhere we went aside from the occasional nip to the shop or short meal out.

We both have experience with dogs and puppies - albeit from childhood/teenhood but still.

My boyfriend does all the communicating with our landlord and I've never actually spoken to her more than saying hello, so I don't feel that I can just step in and email or call her out of the blue. He refuses to ask out of awkwardness/politeness. I'm happy to chip in more money towards rent if that's what it would take to persuade the her.

AIBU if I just... buy a dog? You know what they say, it's easier to apologise than to get permission.

I'm not even suggesting we would be dishonest about it, I just feel like it would be much easier to bargain with her when she sees the sweet little cockapoo we've got isn't a bookcase destroying monster. I know it's not the best thing to do but so many other people seem to get away with it.

It would be completely unreasonable to buy a dog and ask for permission in retrospect.

yes, totally, what would you do if your LL found out and told you to rehome the dog? They could kick you out too for your dishonesty.

Even the most well trained dogs do damage to a home, they have accidents, rip things up, shed fur.

Wait until you have a place of your own, or ask the LL first.

Depends whether you have another place to live lined up if she decides to kick you out for breaching the terms of your lease, I guess.

It's her house and she said no. You should respect that.

Plus your "sweet little cockerpoo" will be a "sweet little puppy" who really will chew everything and mess everywhere.

YABVU, the landlord has every right to kick you out for getting a dog. Finding a rental that will allow dogs is very very difficult (sadly) and it is highly likely you'd end up having to rehome it, which would be incredibly unfair on the dog.

I say this as someone who's main life goal is to get one.

Unfair on your landlord, unfair on the dog.

Oh and any puppy will ruin furniture. It's inevitable.

Yes you would be totally unreasonable and disrespectful to your landlady

I would advise against buying a dog without landlord's consent - you could lose your home and deposit. Very sadly a lot of animals are re-homed due to this.

A dog is a long-term commitment, so I'd plan ahead. Ask your landlord, or email, advising that you would love to rent your home long-term but you also plan to have a dog in the near future, detailing that it will be a small breed, going to work with you during the day etc.
Ask if she would agree to this. She may agree as she wants to keep you as tenants; she may ask you to agree to pay for the carpets to be professionally cleaned at the end of the tenancy or some other clause.
You will probably need to sign a new contract including the dog agreement and pay a fee for this.
If she won't agree, it would be better to look for a new dog-friendly home now (as it is hard to find landlords that accept pets), rather than being given notice and having to find one or face re-homing your pet.
If you are in a block, make sure the management company/freeholder agrees too, as they also get a say and if there is a whole building ban you may be unable to have a dog there.

I really hope she agrees - I would also love to have a dog but don't have a dog-friendly workplace!

Ask. If she says no, move somewhere that allows dogs.

I have severe pet allergies, yes, even to poodles. If you got a dog whilst living in my house, I wouldn't be able to move back there for some time and until a lot of expensive specialist cleaning had been done. You don't know whether your landlady or future tenants would have the same issue.

If the property is leasehold, and the landlady's lease prohibits dogs, you'd also be putting her at risk of legal action by the block landlord.

Why don't you adopt an adult dog? Then you wouldn't have the puppy issues.
Your landlord might be more open to that idea.

Don't buy a a dog without consent from your LL.

What sort of job do you do? Would your boss be ok with a puppy around the place and the fact that it will most probably be weeing and pooing, having many episodes of " mad half hours ", will need playing with and cuddling too?

God no, don’t do it. As a landlord, if my tenants bought a dog and I didn’t know about it, I’d send them the eviction notice. I know, having multiple dogs myself, the damage puppies can do and the mess they make. The garden will be wrecked, too.

I recently had to clear a garden where the people had a cat. It was FULL of cat shit, absolutely disgusting.

Of course YABU to consider buying a dog and then asking permission afterwards. I’m a dog loving private tenant but if I was your LL the fact that I said no and you went ahead anyway and tried to win me over with “but cute puppy!” Would piss me right off and I would give you notice to leave ASAP.

Puppies WILL have accidents and WILL cause some sort of damage.

YANBU to propose an increase in rent and an additional deposit to cover the potential damage. But the landlady would still not be unreasonable to refuse. And if you’re in a block of flats it may not even be up to her. There may be no pets allowed in the block.

An important consideration for renters is even if this LL will allow pets, you are likely to need to move at some point during the 10-15 year lifespan of the dog and may have difficulty finding a pet-friendly place.

Yes that's a totally stupid idea. First find somewhere to live that allows dogs, then get a dog.

Yes, YABVU. It's her property and her choice. If you don't like it, move somewhere that allows dogs.

YABU in also lining the pockets of someone who breeds mongrels and markets them as "cockapoos". Why can't you rescue a dog?

If your boyfriend hasn't asked the LL, and you've never spoken to her, how do you know she isn't keen? Is there a clause in your rental agreement about pets?

I think YWBVU to just get one and then clear it later. It's disrespectful. What's more, you're talking about a living creature, not a new coffee table. There may be any number of reasons why she doesn't want animals in the flat, which may currently be your home, but is still her property.

I would also suggest you think carefully about taking dogs to work in central London daily, especially if you both work 9-5 hours. Some workplaces are dog-friendly as far as the occasional visit is concerned, but might take a different view if someone was bringing a dog in day after day. Also, depending on how you get to work, bear in mind some dogs find travelling on packed tubes and buses very stressful. My dogs - greyhounds - certainly wouldn't like it (although to be fair they are both total drama queens and get all Whitney Houston about things like stairs.)

I had to wait until my work life was in a different shape to get my dogs. (I work from home these days.) I'm glad I waited and didn't give in to my want.

I don't think buying a dog is unreasonable but buying a dog in the circumstances you describe definitely is. After moving into our own home my DP and I got a puppy. He is now 11 months and an absolute superstar thanks to the hard work we've put in.
BUT he has recently started chewing. He is a large breed dog and he has managed to chew his way through 2 doors and every single skirting board on the upstairs landing. He is rarely left alone and I spend an absolute fortune on day care etc. But he is a dog and dogs chew. He has tonnes of toys and chews etc but apparently the door is much tastier! I would not do it without their blessed as more often than not, they are destructive.

Find somewhere to live that will allow you a dog before you make that commitment. It's unfair on your ll and on a potential dog to do what you are suggesting.

You can't get a dog in a rented place without consent, its just rude imo and she could use that excuse to kick you out. On the flip side, if you speak to her, she might agree under certain terms - like you've explained the dog would rarely ever be home unattended, she might see this as acceptable and allow you to go ahead. We live in a rented house owned by a family friend, our situation is massively different in the sense that the house is ours to do with want we want (redecorate etc) but we still asked his permission before we got our puppy as he's not a dog person and is very strict about dogs in his properties but he said because it's us and because of our agreement we can get as many dogs as we wish. I'm glad we asked though, it's just a courtesy if anything.