We have 3 DC under 3. DH works in a busy, high end events job and “entertains” a lot at night. In general, some nights he may work til 11 then go out all night with clients and come back at 8am. He doesn’t drink, so is not drunk. He’s just a workaholic. I feel that he could cut down on the entertaining but he insists he can’t. That it’s what gives him an edge - to babysit the clients when they visit from other countries and sit in their hotel rooms talking to them, or watching them play black jack in a casino (apparently a lot of them like to do this)
The DC are going through a period where they simply do not sleep. The nights DH does sleep here he does not get up with the DC. So effectively his sleep deprivation always trumps mine, even though I am up with the DC every night. I do all care for them, meals, bath, bedtime etc.
I have 5 hours of childcare every weekday and I try to use it to further my education/career so I can go back to work next year. In some of those hours I do actual work, although initially i do not get paid as much as DH. On the days when I have had a run of exhausting nights I simply can’t function to go to classes or meet work people and I have to cancel people or catch up on sleep when I have childcare which frustrates me as I feel my progress is hampered.
DH says I should be using the childcare to rest all the time, given the D.C. sleeping habits. instead of complaining to him that he entertains clients too much and is away from home too much or expecting him to take the role of childcare at night while he needs to work.
He says I need to put the work stuff on hold until the DC are older at school and take advantage of childcare to rest.
I feel this reduces me to a purely functional maternal robot who does nothing other than care for DC and cannot get back into the workplace.
WIBU?