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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be really upset about this?

2 replies

Lostinspace84 · 09/04/2018 20:33

My friend left her husband at the weekend. He went away and she had it all planned. He was very abusive and she felt it was the only way to do it. I supported her to the point that it was taking over my whole family life, but having been a victim of abuse before, I wanted to help. Us and 3 other couples helped her move. I do care for her hugely, but she's difficult and very selfish and does use people for everything she can get. I've always just had to put boundaries up so I don't get taken advantage of.

So he returned today to find she's left. At 6pm, her mother in law came knocking on my door demanding to know where she was and asking me to be a mediator and pass some messages on. She was sobbing and crying and I cuddled her and was really kind. I said I'd take some notes from what she said and pass them on. She kept swinging from being ok, to getting really personal and telling me that her son had 'always hated me' and 'you know exactly why'. She kept getting very personal to me, really goading me and then when I reacted she kept saying I was being awful.

(I didn't raise my voice once). I told her to leave my house as I would not have her being abusive to me about a situation that has fuck all to do with me.

I expected my friend's husband to turn up and demand to know where she's moved to. I didn't expect his mum to! And I feel so upset that she got personal to me, saying they've always hated me. I have suffered PTSD because of last abuse and one of the ways I was abused was by gaslighting and my ex turning people on me. So I guess that's why it's hit me

AIBU to feel really upset and vulnerable? I am genuinely worried they will do some revenge attack on my car or something. i am frightened and I don't want to be involved.

OP posts:
Butterymuffin · 09/04/2018 20:35

Totally understandable to feel upset. Don't let them in again. If any of them call round don't answer the door, just shout that you want them to go away or you'll call the police.

Lostinspace84 · 09/04/2018 21:37

Thanks. I will absolutely tell them that I will call the police if they turn up again.

OP posts:
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