Do I have to be friends with someone I don't like?

[Maggie24715]

I was part of a group of girls that had divided over the years due to settling down etc we were more friends to party with than close mates. One of the girls married and lives in the same area as myself and my husband. My husband loves hers but I've totally gone off of the wife since she became a mother.
She never gets in touch first and always cancels on meet ups (AFTER the time we're supposed to meet which infuriates me) it's like she thinks my time is not important. I have a child with a severe disability to leave the house is quite an ordeal and needs two people. So for her to ignore my calls/messages when we're supposed to meet AIBU to think is unforgivable?
I haven't contacted her since the last feeble excuse sent 4 hours after our arranged time but she messaged me this weekend. I really can't be bothered replying

Don’t reply. Friendship is an optional activity. You can stop be friends with someone whenever you like.

No just ignore her and dont bother anymore

I probably wouldn't bother.

Well I’d keep things polite for the sake of your husband’s friendship, but no obviously you don’t need to be friends with her. Just be pleasant when you see her and otherwise ignore.

What's she like when you do actually meet up? If you enjoy her company when you do get to meet up then I would explain the situation to her.

If you don't enjoy her company then I'd just decline any invites. I wouldn't ignore the messages though as that could cause tensions between your DH and hers.

No don’t bother. Sounds like you don’t like her and it’s more trouble than it’s worth trying to meet up. Your husband can see her husband at the pub if he’s bothered about staying friends with him.

Your DH’s can be friends without you being friends.

You don’t need to be friends with someone you son like and you absolutely don’t need to make social arrangements with someone who repeatedly cancels at the last minute.

Be polite given that your DHs are friends but just decline meet ups.

She sounds rude and you don't have to be friends with anyone you don't like. Your husband can still be friends with her husband...I don't know why couples feel they need to both be friends with other couples.

You don't like this woman (not girl) so why would you arrange to meet up with her at all? I don't get it.

She messaged you 4 hours after you should have met up? So you were waiting for her for 4 hours?

That's ridiculous. I wouldn't bother arranging to meet up with her again.

I had a friend who used to do this - we'd arrange to see each other and then she wouldn't turn up so I'd call her to find out where she was and she'd say 'oh, yeah, I can't come, I was going to call you...' I took the hint and stopped trying to stay friends with her. In your case, it seems she maybe does want to be friends sort of since she's attempted to contact you? If I were you, I'd be tempted to do something petty like agree to meet her and then not show up and cancel a couple of hours after but would probably actually send a nothing reply saying I'm busy at the moment but hopefully soon and then never follow up on it.

Don’t reply _ some people only learn when they taste their own medicine

Yanbu. I wouldn’t bother with this friendship either.

I usually initiate the contact but she always suggests the meet ups. I'm not great at saying no to people, I also had wanted our children to be friends. I don't care anymore.
I do like her when I see her but I'm happy enough to let the friendship go. My husband said not to worry about him.

I know someone who is best friends with someone and their husbands had a big falling out! They have been for years like this. They even go on holiday together with the kids and without the husbands. Find it a bit odd personally but just to say it can work out!

I had a friend who I decided I wanted to distance myself from once, slightly different reasons, but I just didn't bother making contact and she got the message. Life is too short to waste on people that don't make you happy OP.