I can see why SO MANY men want to wear dresses!

[loveyouradvice]

Having just watched my DD spectacular jazz show… 300 kids on stage from 4 -18…. many with seven or more outfits, revelling in the joy of dance and lots of different identities…and of the 300, just 11 were boys…..I am beginning to feel a bit sad for men. If you have had none of this growing up, none of the fun and dress up and pretend….. yes, I can see why you might hanker after it.

Just longing for the day when men can wear dresses and makeup in the street and to work without comment - as men, without having to declare themselves transgender - just as an expression of their masculinity.

To be fair, I think this is a 'rule' men have made for themselves, it has not been thrust upon them. Of course people should wear what the hell they like.

Boys do usually still get to dress up and play pretend though. All the boys I know dress up as superheroes etc. They aren't missing out on the whole experience, they just do it in a different way to girls.

mentallydividing no surveys have been done, it was simply an observation.
Why do you think so many women opt to wear trousers when given the choice, but there hasn't been a comparitive movement from men to wear skirts and dresses?

Perhaps women chose to wear trousers and men don't wear dresses because dresses are viewed as weaker and less serious than trousers by dint of being associated with women? The 70 and 80's were much freer for men to express themselves and I agree we have gone backwards and that enforcement of stereotypes is bad for society as a whole

Just longing for the day when men can wear dresses and makeup in the street and to work without comment - as men, without having to declare themselves transgender

I would agree with this.

I do think that is easier for a woman to dress and behave in a stereotypically Male way than for men to be feminine.

Men can wear whatever they want to - like women can.

"Why do you think so many women opt to wear trousers when given the choice"

I'd question the premise of that. I don't think many women (or girls) do make that choice.

For those that do it might be fashion or style or it's what they feel comfortable in.

Most women I know wear skirts to work. Most of the girls at my sons' school wear the skirt / dress option as opposed to trousers and boys wear shorts as opposed to trousers. That's across the ages from 3-18.

We live in SE Asia but the buildings are cool from the aircon. I don't think it's a climate issue.

If trousers aren't restrictive, why aren't they common in sport?

because dresses are viewed as weaker and less serious than trousers by dint of being associated with women?

I do think this is true. “Male = strong, female = weak” is still the general perception.

Men can wear whatever they want to - like women can.

Technically they can but in reality this isn’t true. Look at the clothes available in shops - these show what the expectations are.

"Men can wear whatever they want to "

If they're willing to get really evil looks in the street and risk getting beaten up you mean?
Have you tried walking down the street with a man in a dress?

"because dresses are viewed as weaker and less serious than trousers by dint of being associated with women?

I do think this is true. “Male = strong, female = weak” is still the general perception."

Women can take on traditionally masculine characteristics more easily than the other way around. Giving boy names to girls is more acceptable than the other way around, of course.

I think this is perhaps the one area men do have it “worse” than women. However, it’s because Male is seen as preferable/stronger than Female.

I’m a woman and I hate dressing up, wearing dresses (apart from in the summer on holiday as a cover up). I wear minimal make-up too.
IF I have to wear a dress I will, for a ‘do’ or whatever, but I never feel that comfortable in them and stress about tights, shoes etc.
My teen Dd hates wearing dresses even more than me - if she absolutely has to she will find the plainest one, or wear an equivalent outfit (ie play suit or jumpsuit).
If a man wants to wear a dress, good luck to him, but I always envy men for their not having to dress up!!

Women had to fight for the right to wear trousers too. Once upon an time it was seen as scandalous to wear to trousers. Even now some people think it's not appropriate for women and girls to wear trousers. Many uniforms are dress or skirt only.
If men want to wear a dress then let them.

I do think kilts for men look wonderfully freeing. Possibly not the modern more formal ones now so much, but back when it was more of a piece of material and a belt. It didn't seem to stop Jamie Fraser anyway.

I think encouraging more boys to dance would be good for many reasons not associated with costumes, but children are so influenced by their parents/society 😬

Men can wear whatever they want to

I remember a news story from the 90's about a British man visiting France who was beaten up by two young men, and died. After they were arrested they explained it was because he was wearing a dress. They were surprised when the concept of kilts was explained to them, after all, the visiting Scotland rugby team didn't play in kilts.

Mentallydividing it's certainly true of the area I live in the UK, at least in the winter. It's actually unusual to see a woman or teenage girl in a skirt (other than school uniforms). I don't think it's anything to do with dresses being seen as feminine and therefore weak either as the trousers that women wear are often not the same as those men wear, therefore I suppose a 'feminine' version. I have noticed some boys wearing very tight skinny jeans lately which almost look like leggings.
Trousers are common in sport, though often short versions, for men and women. Trousers are also worn by women in most occupations which have a physical element, eg, police officer, firefighter.

Someone has already commented on what I wanted to say. Men around the world don't wear trousers either. Not even in my dad's culture. I'm part East African.

Grayson Perry's book 'The Descent of Man' has some great stuff around this theme.

(He's also a dress wearing, non-transgender male)

www.utilikilts.com/customer-photos
Take a look at these beauts. DH gets his out for heavy metal festivals!

I love it when the weather's warm enough for me to wear one of my tents dresses. Just pop them over my head, wear only bra and pants beneath, the dress just hangs from my shoulders and doesn't touch anywhere else, so cool and comfortable.

Dressing-up dresses though, that require stockings/tights and holding your stomach in, and usually a pair of "smart" shoes instead of Birkenstocks - sod that.

I totally get why men might find dresses a comfortable option. A dear friend of mine used to love his dressing gown for comfort, and would change into it as soon as he got in from work. He reckoned he'd love to wear a dress, or a kilt, and found the breeze round his nethers most refreshing.

Men can wear what they like. Nobody’s stopping them. It’s when they put on a dress and declare themselves to be a woman is what is objectionable!

"Just longing for the day when men can wear dresses and makeup in the street and to work without comment - as men, without having to declare themselves transgender"

I wish society would gradually turn itself around to make this totally ordinary and unremarkable.

Personally I love wearing dresses - so much more comfortable than anything that cuts across the middle - a soft jersey dress, woolly tights and comfy shoes is my favourite outfit for comfort - except pyjamas

Young boys play dress up - my 7 year old has about 30 dressing up costumes (partly because he's the youngest child). He used to dress up nearly every day, though he doesn't as much any more. Nothing to do with dresses, though there were dresses in the dressing up basket and the "Yoda" robe is actually pretty much a dress...

Men should be free to wear dresses without pretending it turns them into women, that's true. Clothes don't make you male or female.

I remember a couple of young men who occasionally wore skirts (long, "ethnic" prints not office wear or mini skirts) at uni and they were certainly unusual but most people just accepted it, as students used to, without thinking much except that they were unconventional. Neither thought they were women, both had long hair but wore t shirts with the skirts and didn't try to dress up as some kind of "alterego" - I guess they just liked wearing skirts or were making a point maybe...

The rugby team seemed to be on bar crawls in drag every bloody week. Most of them were egotistical arses who thought they were god's gift to the world, but that was probably we what gave them the confidence to go out in corsets and mini skirts (which no woman would do) the drag wasn't the problem, the loud pushiness was.

I'm a woman and rarely wear dresses or skirts, they are only appealing for very hot weather at home in the garden. I'd rather wear trousers to a wedding or work - feel much more comfortable and confident outside the house and garden in trousers. In the context I wear dresses any man could - nobody would know. But in the context I wear them a man could wander about topless in shorts and a bare chest, which women would be as unlikely to do as men would be to Don a sundress purely for comfort in the garden in August...

My DSS sometimes wears a sarong type thing when it's very hot, but I don't think he actually goes out in it, just wears it in the garden or when we camp in the woodland he manages. He has very fair skin that burns in seconds, so prefers to keep his legs and arms covered.