Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the majority of people have mental health difficulties of some kind??

28 replies

manicinsomniac · 04/04/2018 21:58

I fully accept that my experience may be coloured by the fact that I have been mentally ill for the last 20 years and therefore naturally know more people in the same boat than I would if I was healthy.

But it seems that the majority of my friends have a mental illness of one type or another. It's so common that I'm starting to wonder if this is the new norm for modern society (sounds tragic and dramatic but also worryingly possible?)

Quick breakdown for illustrative purposes:
Friends I still know from school: 2 out of 5
Friends I still know from university: 8 out of 13
Friends from work: 4 out of 7
Friends from church: 7 out of 12
Friends from hobbies: 8 out of 11
Friends from hospitals/units/therapy groups: 8 out of 9 (1 recovered)

The last group is to be expected of course but the others ... am I just a magnet for similar personality types perhaps??
Or are we a really, really ill country?

OP posts:
Marypoppins19 · 04/04/2018 22:01

I think people are much more aware now. Less stigma and more openness.

abc12345 · 04/04/2018 22:03

I agree most people I know have mental health issues

Arapaima · 04/04/2018 22:05

This isn't my experience OP. I know a couple of people who have had depression (including PND) and one with schizophrenia but that's it. I can believe that there are others I don't know about though.

piercinggelo · 04/04/2018 22:06

It's not my experience either.

YourWanMajella · 04/04/2018 22:07

Um, no. Clearly that isn't true. It is entirely possible that we have so pathologised normal human emotions that everyone now thinks themselves to have mental illnesses though.

For example a dr tried to diagnose me with clinical depression right after my mother died and I had my 3rd m/c all at once. I wasn't clinically depressed, I was just SAD. You know, the normal human emotion when sad things happen?
Sure, some people may be clinically depressed at that point, but not everyone who is grieving is so.

DinahMo · 04/04/2018 22:08

I’m surprised that you know the mental health diagnoses (or lack thereof) of so many people in your life!

The usual statistic is 1 in 4, I don’t know where that comes from though.

I don’t think ‘most people’ have a mental health problem, no. I think we are more open about them (which is a good thing) and we are better at recognising them (also good thing) and the law of averages means some of us will know more people with them than others.

annandale · 04/04/2018 22:11

No; but apparently about a quarter of people will at some point know someone who has taken their own life. That's a lot imo.

gandalf456 · 04/04/2018 22:13

I don't know. I think it's a combination of more stresses re exams, work, peer pressure, social media. The always switched on culture doesn't help. I also think substance abuse has become more mainstream and recreational drugs are far stronger than they were, leading to more mh problems. I would not want to be young now

ny20005 · 04/04/2018 22:14

Not in my experience. One friend with pnd & a few with depression / anxiety but that's a small percentage of friends & family

piercinggelo · 04/04/2018 22:14

I wasn't clinically depressed, I was just SAD. You know, the normal human emotion when sad things happen?

This happened to me many years ago. I was 20 and had a mc. My GP's response was to prescribe me Prozac. I never took them (didn't even collect the script from pharmacy) but I can't help but wonder now if o had taken them, would I be reliant on them every time life got a bit tough?

EC22 · 04/04/2018 22:14

Definitely not my experience.

Pinkvoid · 04/04/2018 22:14

1 in 4 so yes, it’s a lot. It’s the same stat for miscarriage, believe it’s 1 in 3 for cancer. Most people will know someone who has suffered from a MH problem at some stage.

MyNameIsNotSteven · 04/04/2018 22:17

I agree that MH is more openly acknowledged and less stigmatised socially. However unfortunately I'm paying a heavy price for needing quite a lot of time off work to deal with depression leading up to and after my DM's death two years ago. I wish I could have been mentally stronger.

LorelaiVictoriaGilmore · 04/04/2018 22:17

Well, it's pretty much my experience. There must be something hereditary in my family. My mother suffered and all three of her children do too. Its horribly 'normal' in my family. I worry about my kids. Sad

Babipotjam · 04/04/2018 22:17

I believe that people go up and down a sort of scale with general mental health.

Twoweekcruise · 04/04/2018 22:20

I have mental health problems and know quite a few who also suffer but also many who do not (including my own very lucky DH).
My sister is a cleaner and says that the majority of her clients have antidepressants on their bedside tables, which is either a reflection of society's mental health or prescription happy health practitioners?! I believe it's today's society, so much to worry and stress about and 24/7 in your face social media and so much pressure on young people. It deeply saddens me.

Cleo2628 · 04/04/2018 22:21

I have thought this too. Can’t figure out if it’s more common now because of our lifestyle (social media cannot be helping at all!) or if it’s just more spoken about.

windchimesabotage · 04/04/2018 22:21

Yes in my experience but that may be because I have suffered myself at one point... so perhaps I have made friends with people who have had similar experiences? I mean ive not done that on purpose but it may be because I have just gravitated towards people who are similar to me in some way. Id say a good 80% of my friends have had some sort of mental health issue ranging from a short bout of depression to schizophrenia. I have a fair amount of friends and acquaintances too, this is not just a handful of people, so it does seem to me like LOADS of people must experience MH issues....

Original poster
manicinsomniac · 04/04/2018 22:22

Yourwanmajella That's a good point but not the kind of thing I'm talking about. These are friends I know well enough to be open with and know that they have been/are being helped with and/or medicated for their conditions. They have diagnoses.

DinahMo - You're right, I could know loads more people with mental health problems that I don't know well enough to discuss them with. These are my actual friends I'm talking about though, not acquaintances - so I know them well enough to talk about things like that. Plus I guess, given my own particular history, a large proportion are eating disorders, which are often much more visible and hard to hide.

annandale - that sounds horrible and scary written down but yes, when I think about it - I'm really not surprised. I actually think most people will know someone, however loosely. The first friend (not close friend, but a schoolmate) I had that killed herself was 12 years old! Sad

Interesting mix of experiences so far - maybe we do tend to orientate ourselves around similar groups of people and maybe certain personalities are more susceptible to mental illness.

OP posts:
YourWanMajella · 04/04/2018 22:26

That's a good point but not the kind of thing I'm talking about. These are friends I know well enough to be open with and know that they have been/are being helped with and/or medicated for their conditions. They have diagnoses

But you're not talking about your friends, you are extrapolating to everyone. Plus that is exactly what you may well be talking about, I had a "diagnosis" but it wasn't the right one. I can be far from the only one.

Mintychoc1 · 04/04/2018 22:28

Slight side issue - as a GP, can I explain some of the apparently inexplicable prescribing of antidepressants for people who are "just sad"?
We see people who are sad all the time. I have no idea why they come to see the Dr, when the Dr clearly can't make their girlfriend come back, or make their husband not have an affair, or make their boss nicer, or give them more money, or bring back to life their deceased relative. So we sit there, sympathising, empathising, and feeling utterly useless, knowing that all we can offer is a sick note and 10 minutes of kindness. But still the patients come to us, so we start to think that maybe they want more, and the only thing we can offer is medication (or the offer of a long stint on a counselling waiting list). And that's how it happens.
OP I am seeing so much more mental ill-health than I used to when I started 20+ years ago. I don't know why. There are numerous possible causes.

Undercoverbanana · 04/04/2018 22:29

The running community is full of people with their own reasons for running. More often than not, the reason is that it is their release from mental health issues.

piercinggelo · 04/04/2018 22:33

I have no idea why they come to see the Dr

I went to sort out contraception post mc as DH and I decided to wait 6 months before trying again. There was no need to prescribe me Prozac. Fortunately I didn't lean on them because that could have been a game changer in my life.

Original poster
manicinsomniac · 04/04/2018 22:33

WanMajella - I'm wondering if my experience is the norm, not assuming that that's the case. I'm asking if others find the same. Seems some do, some don't so I'm none the wiser really! Grin

Mintychoc - can I ask - do you give the real thing to people you feel are suffering from situational depression rather clinical or is it a placebo pill? And, if it is real, a) does it help them? and b) is it dangerous? (ie does it create a dependence or build a tolerance which would result in the pills not working if they were ever to be truly needed in the future?)

OP posts:
Mintychoc1 · 04/04/2018 22:38

Placebo tablets aren't prescribed, that's a myth. They never are, never have been, except in clinical trials, when participants are aware they may be getting a placebo.

Most of the psychiatric drugs GPs can prescribe are not addictive - in fact it's really only benzodiazepines (Valium, temazepam) that are addictive. Prozac etc (SSRIs) aren't addictive.
They can be very helpful for people who need them. They rarely do harm in my experience, although some people get unpleasant side effects and have to stop them. There is no dependence that would cause them to be less effective in future.