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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To hand in my notice?

60 replies

Sleeplessinsouthampton · 03/04/2018 14:58

I don't particularly enjoy my job. I like a few small aspects of it but most of it I find dull, boring, and indeed fairly futile. Moving to another job in my company is near on impossible. However I also dislike the firm itself, structure, completely failure to stick to a policy so we're constantly chopping and changing, lack of confidentiality etc.

I feel burnt out. I would like to have the summer off to catch up on life basically, do some decorating, sort out my garden. Read a book. Just do stuff without cramming it into a weekend and then feeling depressed when it's Sunday night again.

I have about £20k in savings so could support myself and family for s few months, and no mortgage.

In my position would you do it?

Just to add, I have looked for pther jobs but as my job was created specially for me and is very specific, I can't find another job doing the same. I may be able to persuade a firm to employ me doing the aspects I enjoy as part of a wider role if I can convince them to give me a chance. I'm not doing that now because I want a few months off. I have go give 3 months notice so the earliest I will be able to go anyway is July now.

OP posts:

Dorsetdays · 03/04/2018 15:56

If it was me, the answer would depend on what I needed to do after the three months period was up.

You've already said that you've been unable to find another job, and that's with a complete employment history. If you will need to find a job to go back to in three months time, you will possibly find it even harder once you have an 'unexplained' break in your employment history.

12 weeks isn't actually very long to find a job so I think I'd end up feeling stressed during what was meant to be a nice break!

If your mind is pretty much made up I don't see what you have to lose in asking your present employer for a sabbatical (or even a long holiday using any annual leave you have plus some unpaid time off). Alternatively ask to reduce your hours/days, again even if they only agree it for a few months.

If the answer is no to all your options then I'd definitely concentrate on finding another job which offers a better worklife balance before I jumped ship!

Dungeondragon15 · 03/04/2018 16:00

I would if I didn't have a family but not so sure otherwise. Would there be any chance of working on a self employed basis for your current company once the time off was up if you couldn't get another chance.

Dungeondragon15 · 03/04/2018 16:00

chance job!

ChikiTIKI · 03/04/2018 16:01

If I were you I would hand in my notice, take a few weeks to think about what i wanted to do next then start updating my cv etc and job searching. I would start applying for stuff about a month before leaving work unless I saw something that looked amazing before then. Put on your applications that you're available to start from whatever date you plan to end your 3 month break.

Original poster

Sleeplessinsouthampton · 03/04/2018 16:05

Part of the issue is that I really need a good 4-6 weeks off work. And if I go straight from this job to another that would be impossible because of being made to work my 3 month notice. No new employer would wait 4 months plus. Indeed I think that being able to start immediately would be a plus point for employers.but I may be wrong?

OP posts:

Passportto · 03/04/2018 16:09

Employers recruiting to the kinds of roles where three months' notice is the norm expect to have to wait.

I think resigning for no "good" reason is a bit of a red flag to employers TBH. Where I work we've taken two people who had resigned without a job to go to in the last 9 months. Neither has worked out particularly well for us. It is clear there were reasons why they needed to get away.

wantmorenow · 03/04/2018 16:11

There was a thread here in employment issues that highlighted a parent's right to have up to 4 weeks a year off unpaid for each child 18 and under. Doesn't have to be approved, it's a right. Only the timing needs approving. You still accrue pensionable service etc and holiday pay. Hadn't heard of it before as many others hadn't too. Could be used along with annual leave to have a proper break without actually leaving. Might get you the breathing space you need.

Google parental leave.

PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 03/04/2018 16:12

I would be gone like a shot! Discuss it with your family as they will know your circumstances better.

Life is way too short to stay. If you are willing to take a lesser paid job then I think you would find work easily. I would happily take less money so I could be happier with my life in general!

FalafelsAreDelish · 03/04/2018 16:12

I get it and I would do it. Law firms can be hard taskmasters. Could you not sign up to a legal agency in September and ask for paralegal or PSL type roles part time? If you're in Southampton then there are a number of big firms which might want someone part time.

SofieMonde · 03/04/2018 16:21

Just resign. Think about setting up your own firm whilst enjoying a 3 months long summer :)

WorldWideWanderer · 03/04/2018 16:21

If you hate the place and want to get out, there's no point in dropping to 3 days per week, what will that change?
If I were you I would go for it....I have done the same in the past. I worked out I had enough money to last me a year so I went.... I left in the August and in fact had more work (in a different field, and in a different part of the country as well) by the following January, and I'd had some time out to travel and so on in-between. And yes, I had a family.
I have never regretted it once....
Good luck!

JessicaJonesJacket · 03/04/2018 16:21

You sound stressed or/and depressed. Have you seen your GP?
I think it would be UR to hand in your notice without checking if you have a health issue that is making problems seem insurmountable atm. It would be better to be signed off by your GP to give you some breathing space and then see if you still feel the same.
If you hand in your notice with nothing else lined up, you may find that situation even more stressful rather than the idyllic rest period you're imagining.

NWQM · 03/04/2018 16:23

Taking redundancy was one of the best things I ever did. It's a cliché but life really is too short to be unhappy. Could you do some voluntary work to keep your legal hand in so to speak and keep your options open. I'm sure there are plenty of organisations that would like someone with a legal background on their management committee and it doesn't involve a large time commitment.

It's very scary but....very doable. Good luck.

Original poster

Sleeplessinsouthampton · 03/04/2018 16:30

My GP says I may be depressed but is t qualified to diagnose this. All he can offer is anti depressants or I can pay £100 an hour for CBT. Honestly I do think not having to do this job would improve my well being a lot. I've had more stressful roles but I'm older now and less resilient. Plus I'm fortunate not to have to work in the short term, and I feel I owe it to myself to take advantage of that.

OP posts:

InspiredByIntegrity · 03/04/2018 16:40

This would be a step down & says they offer flexible working. I think they would bite your hand off.
www.indeed.co.uk/Legal-Services-jobs-in-Southampton?vjk=6fc511941ef91fb6

TomRavenscroft · 03/04/2018 17:18

My GP says I may be depressed but is t qualified to diagnose this.

Is that usual for GPs? How does anyone get diagnosed?

RainyApril · 03/04/2018 19:12

If you feel that you may be depressed could you pursue a diagnosis and be signed off for several weeks?

I think most employers expect to wait several months while a new recruit works out their notice, whilst resigning for no reason an be a red flag.

Leaving now would just be kicking the can further down the road imo. By Christmas you could be out of money and unable to find a job.

If no suitable jobs exist now, why will there suddenly be suitable jobs in six months?

Original poster

Sleeplessinsouthampton · 04/04/2018 08:45

My GP wouldn't just sign me off. Besides we only get SSP so I would effectively be unpaid. And I'd hit an absence trigger point so be facing a disciplinary when I returned!

I don't know if I'm depressed. Like my GP I'm not a psychologist. But if I am I can't help feeling its as a consequence of my job. Not that hating my job is a consequence of my depression.

OP posts:

RainyApril · 04/04/2018 09:03

It's clear you hate your job and that something needs to change.

Surely you can't face a disciplinary if signed off ill by a doctor? And SSP is more than the 'nothing' you'll get if you walk out. It would offer you the weeks off that you need, and some breathing space to get your ducks in a row.

But I do understand if you need the absolute closure of leaving, rather than a few weeks off with the return hanging over you.

In the end you will do what feels right to you, but I would just hate you to end up in a worse position when the money runs out, if you can't find another job.

If you are confident you will be able to find another job then, why not look for one now? You could find a new job, tell them you can start after your notice period, then ask your current employer to release you early for some time off.

orangesmartieseggs · 04/04/2018 09:05

My GP says I may be depressed but is t qualified to diagnose this.

Eh? This makes no sense. My GP has diagnosed me with depression before?

If you're not happy, leave, but bare in mind if you don't get a job, not only are you eating through your savings but you're also not contributing to your pension. Do you have good pension provisions in place? Are you happy to be spending £1000 a month on day-to-day expenses when you have nothing coming in to replace those funds?

Quickerthanavicar · 04/04/2018 09:11

As far as I know we get to be here once.
If you can take a sabbatical so you have the comfort of knowing there is a job waiting for you after 6 months/ a year then do that. Just check what happens if you change your mind and don't go back.
But if you are unhappy, if you are thinking I can't put up with this shit anymore, resign.
A happier you will be a better you for you and your family.
Time is precious, buy the shoes, dance the dance, eat the fucking cake. xxx

DrDreReturns · 04/04/2018 09:12

I handed in my notice a couple of months ago with nothing else lined up. Like you I had savings and no mortgage so I could live for a couple of years without employment. I found a job about a month ago and I start at the end of this month, so I'm currently enjoying three weeks off. My advice is if you can afford it and you are confident of finding work again after being out of the workplace for a few months then go for it. Handing in my notice was brilliant - you're saying 'I'm leaving and there's nothing you can do about it!'

Jessikita · 04/04/2018 09:14

Do it.

If you can’t find a job in your field immediately you can always do manual agency work to top up your income if necessary.

Pip3fish · 04/04/2018 09:55

Can you ask for some unpaid leave from work ? 20k is OK but the bills will keep arriving

DeliberatelyAwkward · 04/04/2018 10:05

Perhaps I'm very lucky/naive, but I've never had a problem finding a job, so I don't really understand what reads like desperation in some posts regarding hanging on to this soul sucking employment.

After you've handed in your notice, 3 months will feel like soooo long, so hurry up and get it in! You'll still manage to be off in time for the school holidays just about at this rate?

The post you really need to be writing is "I'm quitting work. Suggestions wanted for lovely things to do once the garden is finished."

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