To want to protect my assets

[AmazingGrace16]

DH and I have been together 13 years, married, I dc with 1 on the way. Perfectly happy but like everyone we have our ups and downs I suppose!

We bought our first house about 4 years ago with a 35k deposit that I put down. Since then we have sold and bought again and I will have contributed an extra 100k to the house in the format of either additional deposit or money for a large extension.

We had a conversation a couple of years ago about me protecting that money (he brought it up) but it wasn't 100k+ then so it always went on the back burner.

Would I be unreasonable to want to protect that 135k in some way and how would I go about doing it? It's all been inheritance or money gifted to me.

Ta!

Jon66 is correct. This is property law, not divorce law.

The problem is if you say, "This is mine" then surely he could say, "Well, THIS is MINE!" If he's the higher earner, presumably he's paying more of the mortgage now?

It's property law not divorce law now. OP is clear she's also talking about hypothetical splits though, as well as within the marriage. Thus, while it's rational for her to think about protecting now, and to take those steps, it's also rational for her to consider worst case scenarios.

Assets pre marriage & inheritances, I feel, are totally fine to be ‘ring fenced.

Pre-marital assets won’t be ringfenced if there’s not enough funds in the marrital pot to house any children of the marriage.

Op if you wanted to keep your pre-marital assets/inheritance to yourself it may have been better to keep it separate.

Do it OP.

This time last year l was married. Now l have been "up graded" and I'm getting divorced.

Protect yourself.

I thought inheritance could be separated out.

I am afraid that it will all go into the pot. In our case the house was in my name only as I had purchased prior to marriage. He was able to put a hold on it in the land registry and then the starting point was 50/50. The court ruled that he had to be housed.

Have you asked DH how he feels about becoming tenants in common & stipulating your individual percentages of ownership in a deed of trust? I'd imagine he'd be pretty hurt tbh unless you word it correctly. My DH is my second hubby & I want to protect my DC on the event of my death & his potential remarriage & their money being lost. As far as im concerned once I'm gone I would be happy for everything to pass to him under the strict understanding (that i'd get properly drawn up) that everything from our marital estate passes to the DC upon his death regardless of what he does in future. He says he won't remarry, but I'd want him to & who knows what lie ahead? It's sensible to be prepared.

@ fluffyunicorns it went in the pot because he asked for a hold and to be done so.

This isn’t divorce law it is property law and as long as both parties agree and get independent legal advice it’s fine

Lots of inaccurate advice on this thread. You need to see a solicitor but there is no point entering in to a declaration of trust. Also, for the avoidance of doubt, if you hold these or other assets in your own name or joint names they all potentially fall into the pot if you divorce.
The only thing you can do to protect yourself at this stage is both sign a post nuptial agreement.

Do it OP. I would never put myself in the financial position of owning a property as joint tenants ever again. Tenants in common all the way.

as jon66 said. We have just done this with our wills to ensure assets cant be used for care if one dies. It's a 50/50 split for us but can be whatever you decide between you. It cost £360 for the two wills and TIC including the form to Land Registry who don't charge for this (At the moment). It is also valid from the moment it is signed and witnessed even if there is a backlog at Land Registry

There's no 'will all go into the pot' about it. It might do in the event of a divorce, in England and Wales that cannot be ruled out, but it won't automatically.

Oh I would also say that if I had 135k and was concerned about this, I'd use some of it to pay a solicitor to advise me.

I think you're both entitled to protect yourselves financially. YANBU to want to protect the deposit you made. Likewise, if he's the higher earner, he wouldn't be unreasonable to put some of his salary aside for himself before putting the rest of it in the family pot. When around half of marriages end in divorce, I think everyone needs to be realistic and protect themselves. The notion of "family money" sounds lovely and romantic, but I don't think its the most sensible thing to do in 2018.

Just in case anyone partnered rather than married reads this, I did this.

We are tenants in common and have a declaration of trust that says the first £150k comes to me and the remaining equity is split 50/50 because that was the difference in our financial contribution. So yes, as PPs have said, it’s entirely possible and sensible if unmarried. If married, it’s all in the pot so I don’t really see the point, unless to argue that you’d always intended it to be split that way if you divorced.

Thanks for all the advice. I will definitely speak to a solicitor first regarding this. It was money I inherited once we were married and it made total sense for it to go into property. It was the only way we were able to afford a house. I'm likely to come into more money and I want to be sensible about where the money goes if and when I die. We do both contribute equally to the mortgage but as I'm disabled it's likely although not definite that I may die before DH. I'm trying to be pragmatic about the fact it's a lot of money and he may well remarry etc. It's useful to know this money could be detailed to go to our dc specifically.

Thanks for all your advice.

My parents who have been married 50 odd years just did this recently
Separated the house deeds into tennant in common with them each owning 50 /50 with mirror wills with the rights for the other spouse to stay in the house in the event of the others death

And their 50 percent going to myself and my sister in trust .

It also ensures that should one of them die their half of he house can't be used for care home fees as it won't be belong to the surving spouse
Or if the surving spouse should marry the new wife would only be entitled their half not the half let to myself and my sister
Old age, illness, several hospital stays focussed their minds
I got them to use Mumblechum. ( Marlow wills ) who advertises on mumsnet
It was all done by email and phone and very quick and easy

Life interest trust wills protects for kids if you die first but allows spouse to use during his life.

If you have a long marriage and divorce it's all on the table. Otherwise a high earner could walk off with everything "it's mine I earned it" leaving sahm spouse and kids with nothing.

@Mumblechum did my Will too. I needed a disabled child one sorting.