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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for reassurance about the terrible two’s?

8 replies

LegoMa · 31/03/2018 21:54

Help! Feeling really shit atm as my DS, who is 26 months is really getting into the terrible 2’s thing recently. He’s always been a ‘strong willed’ little boy since I can remember, but on the whole he is independent, very bright, funny and loving. But just the last few weeks he has started hitting me (and his dad) across the face, headbutting etc in temper. He also throws things and knocks things off tables in temper too. He throws toys at me, he is now refusing all food (despite always being a relatively good eater before), kicks off getting in the bath, kicks off getting out of the bath, refuses to let me brush his teeth etc. He also does this very very loud high pitches scream repeatedly- for no reason, it’s blood curdling! When we tell him to stop he does it all the more. I just feel like it’s a constant battle atm. I’ve posted before about his willfulness in the past but this is really getting me down.

I know a lot don’t agree with it but we do do the naughty step for 2 mins when he’s really bad. And I try to firmly explain that no that’s not acceptable etc. It’s hard not to get stressed with him though especially with the screaming.

Just looking for some words of wisdom or advice as I feel like it’s my fault and I’m doing something wrong. Tell me this gets easier?!

OP posts:
HumphreyCobblers · 31/03/2018 22:00

It definitely does get easier. Try reading How to Talk so Kids will Listen. I found this very helpful. The naughty step I don't like, not because it is cruel or anything, but because I don't think it works! IMO obviously, which is subjective but I have seen a lot of badly behaved children who are constantly put in the naughty step...

My son was awful at two to three. I was in despair. But now he is an exceptionally civilised 11 year old. The behaviour as toddler doesn't mean they will grow up feral.

helpconfused · 31/03/2018 22:06

I'm Going through this with my DS who will be 3 in June.
Only since a change in Home life though. I too have got the above mentioned book and only on chapter two.
Due to the change in circumstance I have social services involvement and going on a Solihull course in May. I'm hoping this gives me more insight but is a long time to wait. His behaviour is getting worse by the day.
I sat him on the stair twice this afternoon. It was the first time I have done this. I told him he had to sit there until he was ready to say sorry to mummy for smacking as it wasn't a nice thing to do, made me sad and now he is sad because of it.
Today I have been repeatedly kicked, smacked, toys/clothes thrown at me, dummy thrown at the tv, no dinner eaten, shouted at, feet stamped... worst day by far.
I feel sorry for him as his home
Life has turned upside down and it's hard to adjust

GreenVoyage · 31/03/2018 22:09

My DD is 20 months and exactly the same! We've had them early Grin

LegoMa · 31/03/2018 22:33

Thanks I will deffo get that book and be having a read! My MIL said to me today something like “if he’s like this now god help you when he’s older” and I said “I’m hoping he’ll mellow a little bit” and she replied with “well good luck with that!” And it got me worrying maybe this is just him! I want to know this is a phase and how best to try and teach him right from wrong etc.

helpconfused I’m sorry to hear you’re going through a rough time atm, with your change of circs and with your DS. Hopefully the book will help you and he too will adjust and get used to things and his behaviour will settle soon.

Haha green I remember being told when DS was 16 months that we got the terrible 2’s early! He mellowed for a bit when his speech picked up but now this is like living with a mini hulk Shock Wine

OP posts:
Gunpowder · 31/03/2018 22:40

DD1 was such a horror when she was two that DM asked me if I could get help from the council for my very difficult child! Grin I was quite offended at the time but it was exhausting and you so have my sympathies. Anyway she is now a delightful (although still sometimes wilful) five year old. Hang in there. It does get better.

HumphreyCobblers · 31/03/2018 22:41

Goodness, it is definitely just a phase! Your MIL is wrong.

There are lots of threads I started in despair on here, about the violent and stroppy behaviour of DS1. He became civilised when his language skills improved. He was a late talker.

helpconfused, so sorry you are having such a stressful time. I am sure the book WILL help, as will a parenting course. I tried to get on a course with DS1 but couldn't access one.

2ndSopranos · 31/03/2018 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 31/03/2018 22:44

I promise it gets easier. I found 2 impossibly hard, and almost as soon as DD hit 3 she turned a corner. DS is now 14 months, I'm dreading next year 😩

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