Baby envy

[BeakyPlinder]

I realise I am completely unreasonable in this situation but I must find out if I am the only one....

I have a 1yr old, hes wonderful and I adore him but I do not want another baby for a few more years, DH in complete agreement. However, 3 of my friends are currently pregnant and whilst delighted for them I am utterly green with envy! Obviously I am not a total arse and would never dare admit this out loud IRL. But what is wrong with me?! Why can't I just be truly excited for them instead of feeling like I'm pretending to be excited whilst secretly wishing it was me doing it all over again?!

Please mumsnetters just tell me to get a grip and get over myself

Id never tell anyone to get a grip.
It doesn't matter if you're broody or not. Jeslousy can still rare its ugly head.
Your mind and body don't always work in sync. I've never been broody since I had my dd 19 years ago. I was just never interested in having more kids. I love my sleep too much. .
However when my dd was little 4 of my friends were all pregnant at the same time. I was insanely jealous.

Also theres no law that says "You have to be excited for them". You don't have to give shiny shit, to be perfectly honest

I have three dc. I don’t even want any more but I still get envious of pregnant women!

It must just an animal instinct

I get this. My DD is 4 months old and 5 of my friends are pregnant and all due around the same time. I don't want another baby yet. I think I'm more jealous of the excitement that pregnancy brings, feeling those kicks, the planning, the shopping. They will all be off on mat leave together whereas I have had to do it solo. I am also jealous that they all seem to be loving pregnancy whereas I was sick as a dog the whole way through and was a massive mess. But I tell myself, pregnancy isn't going to last forever and soon they will have a newborn...and do you really want to go through all that again so soon? The colic alone is enough to put me off

I'm never jealous of pregnant women but I find myself very keen to hold babies. Offer to go over and hold the baby while they catch up on housework or have a nap or eat a meal with two hands... All the things you struggled with while looking after a newborn. And then give the baby back feeling full of fuzzy baby love with none of the unpleasant 24/7 actually looking after a baby effort.

I'm over fifty and still get envious of pregnant women. I adored being pregnant, and loved the newborn stage.

I think it's quite normal.

I hve a 1.5 yo who has only just started sleeping through, my DH an I agreed no more, but I'm still jealous.
I assume it must be instinctive to make you have more than one

I think it’s hormonal. Your body is trying to trick you..

Tell yourself I’m not ready now but When I’m ready it’ll be my turn again.

Ok I'm relieved I'm not the only one...although I was thinking a few angry mumsnetters would tell me to buck my ideas up and be grateful for what I've got and that would put me right back in my place 😂.

Oh animal instinct to procreate must be right. Plus the hormones...back to eating Easter eggs and browsing jojo mama bebe I go (for newborn size stuff obvs. I shop in asda and primark for my 1 year old)

Oh give it time,Beaky.

I have permanent bump envy. Loved being pregnant.

BeakyPlinder

Did you have an easy pregnancy? Or maybe just remembering it with rose tinted glasses?

I'm 37 weeks and the only thing I've enjoyed are the scans and knowing I get a baby at the end. The baby is the pot of gold at the end of grayscale rainbow for me. I've often wished babies really were delivered by storks, so I have trouble imagining being envious of a pregnant woman.

Might sound like a lame idea but maybe try making a list of everything you found sucky about being pregnant before, that might quell the baby fever.

I loved being pregnant! Especially all the puddings and snacks I ate without counting a single calorie or syn. Oh and the maternity leave. What I wouldn't give for another year of maternity leave...(without the extra baby)

Oh I hated every minute of being pregrant
I had sickness all the way through, and Why they call it "morning" sickNess I'll never know as mine lasted all day.
I was a right narc snarling and hissing at everyone.
Oh and you couldn't be more than a second late or I'd have you pronounced dead.
Don't get me wrong before I got pregnant I used to think oh it looks so easy. You just sit with your feet up like a Queen getting pampered and fussed over.

Hormones, hormones and damned hormones, OP!

My second is 4 days old. So far I've spent 4 nights sitting up until 4am feeding a squalling milk demon that will only settle when superglued to me, and tonight I'm shortly going to be juggling breastfeeding and paneer tikka. That isn't going to end well for someone, probably my sofa!

Enjoy being able to drink/eat what you like and get some sleep . Oh and even whilst drugged off my tits during the op, all I could think was, "hoorah, I won't be fucking pregnant any more!" being pregnant is amazing because baby, but it's physically shite!

Yes, hormones! When DS2 was born, he was poorly and he was in the hospital for two months. I had this overwhelming urge to get pregnant again straightaway. I think it was because I couldn't bring him home The day we brought him home, the urge went away. still really want another one though!

Have 3 DC and will be having no more but i think I’ll alwys be slightly envious of pregnant woman! Especially those in blissful ignorance or 1st time. With dc2 and 3 I just knew I would be tired!

Oh so YANBU

It's weird. I have a 3 year old conceived with a donor egg via ivf (I have a genetuc condition that may have been passed on with my eggs). He is our world and more wonderful than we could ever have hoped for. I am an only child and DH is the eldest of three. Neither if us wanted more than one and we couldn't afford more than one. We've donated our remaining embryo to reaearch. I had a nightmare pregnancy and my pelvic floor is still in spasm from the birth. But yep I still get a twinge of envy when my friends announce their pregnancies!

Two of my friends and I were pregnant at the same time - our babies were born every two weeks after each other. It was so fun to talk babies with them! Maybe you are feeling a bit left out because they are all doing it at the same time together.

I was only pregnant a few weeks ago (DC2 is 2.5 weeks old!!) and already I miss it Despite having horrendous nausea for the first 20 weeks and struggling with SPD for the last 10..

I know rationally we don't want any more children (I'm not really a fan of the baby stage, struggle hugely with the sleep deprivation, I've had the most horrendous guilt since he was born about splitting my time and attention between him and DD who is 22 months so don't really want to divide it further and I'm 35 so whilst not too old for another, I do want to get to a point in the not too distant future when I can enjoy being me again)... BUT there is still a little sadness creeping in of never being pregnant again..

I think as someone said, it's partly the anticipation, excitement, the feeling of them kicking (I so adore this part of pregnancy)..

I think for me as well, DC2 happened a bit sooner than planned.. DC1 took almost a year whilst DC2 about 24 hours.. So it sounds silly especially as TTC DC1 was fraught with fertility worries but I kind of missed that 'are we, aren't we' anticipation of TTC..

So I think what I'm trying to say is it's totally normal and to enjoy the anticipation and definitely listen to your head rather than rush into it.. And to also enjoy the time with just DC1

I get envious too. Mine is linked to pregnancy and birth trauma...wanting the pregnancy or birth that others have had. Envying them for their innocence or naivitee at announcing on the wee'd on stick.

allnames