Might as well cut her off

[CatStacks]

Me and my friend have known each other a long time, years. she is in a toxic relationship with a drug addicted gambler who always puts her in bad situations.
I asked her for help about 3 weeks ago which is agreed however she messaged me saying her boyfriend won't allow her to help me.

so I read the message and didn't reply.

I messaged her yesterday saying I miss you

she replied with haven't heard from you in ages
I then said same

she read it and ignored it, she had not tried to reach out to me either.

should I just delete her number? I'm not going to beg her

or no

No, don't ignore her. Sounds like her partner is doing his best to isolate her from any kind of support, don't make it easier for him.

I will be forever grateful to the friends who had so much patience for the years that my alcoholic abusive ex repeatedly tried to cut me off from friends and family.

Obviously your situation will be different, but if you can, give her some time. She wanted to help you, but can't. She probably feels bad about it and maybe that's why she hadn't been in touch.

We’re you asking for financial help? Only ask cos a controlling drug addict ain’t gonna be happy about that

Sorry, gambler too
She sounds like she’s in a really crappy relationship
Don’t cut her off just yet

If she is nothing more than a taker then what do you gain by trying to hold onto this friendship?

no not money literally for her to make a call for me I was to scared to make

because the person we were calling was male that is why her boyfriend said that

Di you think her boyfriend is controlling and ordered her? Or that she didn't want to do it and used him as an excuse?

You want to cut her off because she won't do what you want when she's in an abusive relationship? You don't sound like a very good friend.

You want to cut off a friend in a seriously abusive relationship because she is prevented from doing you a favour?

Do you hear yourself?

You sound pathetic.

She replies and basically you know she's being controlled so you ignore her and then you have the cheek to see your arse when she doesn't reply to you?

You're not a friend i'd want

I think you need to recognise that she’s in an abusive relationship and her partner wants to isolate her from all her friends so you’d be playing into his hands.
It may make the friendship one sided but if you’re a true friend you need to offer her support with no strings

Wow. Mumsnet astounds me sometimes.

Usually posters seem pretty hot on "you don't owe them anything" "put your own wellbeing first" type stuff if a friend is needing ongoing support but not giving much in return. (Not that I agree.) Usually it involves mental health problems. Yet when the friend could actually do something about her situation and leave the awful man, posters are sympathetic to the point of slating the OP! Bizarre.
Yes I know its difficult to leave an abusive relationship (pretty difficult to cure your own mental health issues without support too...) but really?!

OP, I'd stay in touch as he is obviously trying to isolate her, however don't get over involved in her his drama, and sadly don't epect much reciprocal friendship until she eventually leaves him.