To feel unhappy with being a uk size 12?

[lazysloth]

First of all this is not intended to be 'fat shaming' in any way. I know lots of ladies who look fabulous (and most importantly feel it) in larger sizes.
In my late teens and early-mid twenties I was always a slight size ten (not small enough to feel comfortable in an 8 but more like a size 9). I feel comfortable, happy, confident and healthy at this size.
I am now late 20s and seemingly out of nowhere I am a size 12, bordering on a 14. I tried on some size 12 jeans today in River Island and whilst they fit they really did not look any good!
I am not eating any more or doing any less excercise. Do you have to try harder at this stuff once you hit late twenties/ early 30's? I am really not happy with my body and feel like I need to cover up .
Everyone else says I look fine and this is a normal and healthy size.I am wondering if I shouldn't be so worried about it and it's all in my head? But I'm feeling like I need to go on some sort of diet. I've never been able to diet properly ever and I really hate the gym.

I've never been able to diet properly ever and I really hate the gym

Then get used to being fat. How tall are You?

Size 12 isn’t a large size!

I am not 'fat'. I'm 5'8". I have never really needed to diet because I have always been within the healthy range. Just because I hate the gym doesn't mean I don't exercise. I just don't enjoy it. Not sure I have found the right exercise for me yet.

How tall are you OP?

Size twelve sounds fairly normal for an adult rather than a teen. What do you do for a job? Are you sitting at a desk all day?
Rather than gym or diet, can you run or cycle?

Thanks @MyDcAreMarvel.
I know it isn't that big and I know you can be happy at any size it is more just your mindset towards it.
I think it is just because I have been used to being a size 8-10 for so long and now suddenly I am a 12-14. It is a bit of getting used to.

Then get used to being fat
Its how you feel at the end of the day. I'm a size 12 was a 10 & everyone tells me I look fine but I want to be a 10 again! I love cake though, I also love exercising but keep getting injured. I'm afraid once you reach 30 your metabolism slows down & you either need to eat less or move more. I just move more (when this old body allows!)

@Kingsclerelass yes I am at a desk all day. Cycling does sound fun, I'm just a bit scared about cycling on the roads!

Yes sadly the older you get the harder it is to stay trim!

Honestly if you are 5”8 and over 35 I don’t think being an 8-10 looks good like it does in your teens and twenties.
I am half an inch taller than you and would be underweight at anything less than a size 12.

It is harder as you get older. And it's okay to not be happy heavier than you are used to even though there are thousands of people who are heavier.

It's not a slight on them or a judgement or heavier people. I felt gross at a size 14 (caused by meds) after always being an 8-10. I'm now a 12 and happy with that but wouldn't want to be a 14 again, it didn't suit me and I felt horrible.

Loads of my friends are bigger sizes, feel happy and look fab.

I didn't. It's okay.

YANBU to want to lose a few pounds but it doesn't sound as though you need to do anything drastic to achieve that. A size 12 now is a lot bigger than it was even in the 90s and I think this leads a lot of people into believing they're a healthy size when in fact they aren't.

The older you get the more you spread and the harder it is to keep off.

I think the consensus amongst everyone I know seems to be that you hit late 20s / 30s and suddenly your metabolism slows down. I always used to be a size 8 as a teenager right up until I was about 23 and slowly I’ve just crept up size wise. It never bothered me until 2 kids later and age 37 I am was a size 16-18 and I didn’t really like what I saw anymore. I was very unhealthy too- no exercise, eating the wrong stuff etc.

I decided to change and now I do 2 dance cardio classes a week and go to the gym 2 times as well. I am slowly losing weight - without extreme dieting. Lots of my friends do slimming world but I don’t have the interest or self control for that.

I think if you want to stay as slim as you were when you were younger you really have to work at it - diet and / or exercise when you get older...!

It is a slippery slope.

When I hit my late twenties I started to pack it on. An older co-worker told me (we were talking about weight, it wasn't unsolicited) that you have to be very careful as you get older because you can to sleep a 12 and wake up a 16 without any idea how. And it happened to me!

I thought I wasn't eating much more than normal and I'd never exercised. Truth was I was snacking/eating sweets a bit more than normal, and drinking more. Never to excess anyway....or so I thought...but I had indulged myself as a teen/in my twenties and never paid for it.

Now I eat a very low fat diet and swim regularly and am down to thinner than I was before. I look at people eating what I used to eat and am amazed that I was ever amazed that I'd gained weight!

Thank you all, it's looking like I'm going to need to work a bit harder at it.

12 isn't nor has it ever been a large size. I'm very old. I've seen a lot. It really isn't. Never been either

Just for the record, River Island jeans are notoriously small...I have a size 10 friend who has to buy a 14 in there...but nowhere else. However, it's down to how you feel about yourself and how comfortable you are!

@gussyfinknottle thank you. I suppose it's more how individuals feel about their size rather than the actual size itself. Personally, I'm just not comfortable at this size. Others may be at larger sizes and that is fine too .

The point isn't "12 isn't big," it's that OP is bigger than she wants to be. She knows it's not a huge size.

I will say though just going by clothing sizes in different stores is not very reliable. I'm Sainsbury's I'm an 8 but in Primark I can go up to 12. In H&M alone I go from 6 to 14 depending what the item is

lazysloth, at your age the best thing to do is acknowledge it and do something about it because if you don’t it creeps up quite quickly and suddenly you find yourself with a big job on your hands and a few stone to lose instead of a few pounds.

Yoga and Pilates are quite good exercise for people who don’t like exercise. There are some quite good phone apps too like the 30 day challenges that give you workouts you can do at home in short periods which get progressively harder. You can do a lot in front of the TV with dumbbells and resistance belts if you want.

It also might be worth looking into high impact exercising as there seems to be some evidence that short intense bursts of exercise are better than longer workouts. That’s also good for people who don’t like exercise because shorter bursts are less boring.

Oh, and re diet, try cutting out carbs for a few weeks and eating meat, fish, eggs, vegetables a few nuts a day with a little cheese.

OP mentioned fat shaming. I don't think 12 is fat

This happened to me. I was an 8-10 all my adult life, then when I was 34 I went up to a 12 in the space of a few months. I hated it, didn't feel like me anymore. I stayed that size for three years and never got used to it.
Turned out to be an underactive thyroid.
I'm back at my old size now, but it's made me hyper-aware of my weight in a way I never used to be when I took being slim for granted.
I know in my head that size 12 is not fat...I'm 5'6" so it was still within healthy weight guidelines for me. No-one would have looked at me and thought "fat". But I couldn't get used to it, it never felt like "me".

Unless you're very tall, actually a modern size 12 is quite big IMO. Not the official measurements, but the sizes they actually make.

I'm 5'7" and have a BMI of 22.5, so towards the top of "healthy". In most shops I buy a 10 skirt/trousers and an 8 top. At a 12-14 I'd be overweight and I am quite tall. I have no idea where/how properly thin people buy clothes.

It's true you can't get away with eating rubbish as you get older but that takes it's toll in other ways than just your weight too, so much better to change what you eat generally than to "diet".

I gained 20lbs between the ages of 20 and 40.
1lb per year really creeps up on you. You don’t notice it at the time.
But now I’m really unhappy with my weight :(