Instamums 3, 2.0

[blackmirror1]

Seeing as the original 3 got zapped.

[TheLadyhasarrived]

Sorry I did mean unreality of their world!

[Anewhope]

To be upfront, the general consensus within the blogging community that I am a part of from what I can gather (and I obviously don't speak for everyone) is that if you are paid for the post you #ad. If you get sent something you #gifted. I'm not entirely sure where #spon fits in to be honest, it seems a bit pointless to me.

I agree that we do need much clearer guidance and much more upfront disclaimers. Even as a blogger I'm confused as to when I should #ad or #gifted though I try to generally explain in the caption what has happened. Though if I'm honest I've earnt less than £300 from insta since I started so perhaps I'm just a bit crap at it.

[ObiJuanKenobi]

I've said it from the beginning I really like MoD and FODs accounts and I actually do find them relatable to me as a parent of multiples but this thread certainly opened my eyes to how much 'ad' stuff was being forced on me without my knowledge and that will definitely have an impact on how I engage with these sorts of accounts going forward.
I don't agree with a lot of what's been posted here or the batshit weird posts last night but as someone who did, and still does, really like MOD..etc I think that's where genuine and uncensored debates such as these can be really valuable for everyone.

MP has clearly taken some of this onboard and I hope others follow suit.

[IsThisAWindUp]

@Anewhope, The Oneroofsocial blog covered this recently. This is written by bloggers, for bloggers and is a good read >https://www.oneroofsocial.com. They recommend not using the gifted hashtag but says explanation needs to be clear whether or not you use a hashtag (personally I think #ad is the clearest way and then you don't have to go into War and Peace about what the actual arrangement is.)

[Babaloo88]

I much prefer the positive attitude MP has to this ‘change’ on IG. Rather than mod’s ‘let’s bury my head in this #gifted sand’ attitude. I’m quite surprised with mod’s lack of empathy to her followers. She seem to not really care as long as she gets what she wants. All followers are saying is be transparent, state when you have been gifted with free things. So, that other mothers don’t feel inadequate because they can’t afford a luxury holiday and expensive bags etc!

[Festivecheeseandcrackers]

I started a blog a few years back which started to become a little bit successful. Unfortunately my full time job got in the way and then I had my son. It was too much to keep up with! I got given quite a few things for free - theatre tickets, pub lunches, clothing. I always made it clear in my posts that they were gifts. However I also reviewed things which weren’t gifts. It was part of building up the profile. I’m sure some people may have thought I had been given it for free though.

Anyhow, I do agree that greater transparency is needed and I think it is slowly getting better. For a while it was really dishonest the way some posts weren’t marked as ‘ad’ or it made clear that something was a gift.

However I think some people have been plain nasty on the other thread making some quite personal comments and I think that’s really harsh. I also thought that from some (not all) posters, there seemed to be a bit of a hatred towards some of these instagram mums because they are middle class and so not representative. But we aren’t all the same and they will be representative of some mums. I do agree that it would be nice if a more diverse range of people was represented and perhaps some people here might be inspired to give it a go themselves. I’m sure there will be people who want to listen to their life story too. Of course, it’s not for everyone this instagramming/blogging stuff so maybe not.

[wizardswife79]

I'm new to this thread and also new to instagram. My account is private and I only follow people I know / clubs I belong to.

I've got a couple of questions:

I think a friend is trying to become an InstaMum - loads of photos of her kids and she always # brands of the clothes they are wearing (which tend to be small independent labels, they would never wear supermarket clothes or mainstream labels) and she always # places they stay on holiday etc etc. This thread has got me wondering whether she is getting paid or freebies to do this? How many followers would you need to get freebies ?

Doesn't really bother me as I'm not 'influenced' by her anyway, we have very different lifestyles / tastes. Just wondering.

Also how do these people reconcile posting everything about their lives with safety ? Do they have no concerns about safety? My friend's account is open and she gives all the details of her kids, names etc and they have regular places they visit. I also think if you wanted to you could probably figure out where they live from her photos etc. Then she goes and announces to the whole world that they are on holiday - or that her husband is on holiday/away on business and she is alone with the kids.........

Even though I only have a few followers (people I know) I'm still very cautious about not giving away way I live (eg never post photos of the outside of my house) and if I post holiday snaps I tend to do 'flashbacks' when I get back rather than announce to the world that I am away.....

[Mrscog]

Yes @theladyhasarrived Emma Hill is brilliant - both content and ethics wise.

[Mrscog]

And Anneli Bush has just posted a few stories with luxury stuff ‘from the post depo’ She is very bad at disclosure in my experience.

[Mumofkids]

Cigarettesandcalpol has addressed this in stories. She's so lovely and genuine.

[Anewhope]

@wizardswife79 I think you can 'monetise' as soon as a brand thinks you are suitable for whatever campaign they are running. So I have less than 2000 followers and get very very few opportunities, though occasionally I get a few that are relative to my 'niche'. Though, relative to that I get a hell of a lot of emails from brands wanting me to write about them or post their content without any compensation for myself. You would be surprised at the dishonesty of a lot of brands who actually ask you not to declare too.

In relation to security, I'm not sure here how to answer to be honest. I've posted before about being home alone or I've tagged places near to where we live. I've never mentioned schools or the particular town I live in though, just the county. I think with my last holiday I posted my photos a few days after we returned for reasons of security.

[TheLadyhasarrived]

Mrscog love Emma Hill and that flies in the face of the jealousy argument, she obviously gets sent a lot of her fashion but she discloses it and I feel entirely positive towards her.
I genuinely don’t mind if bloggers are sent stuff as long as they let me know, I don’t appreciate being lied to, or lying by omission which seems to be more prevalent.

[ChocolateTea]

I was on the originals thread back last year, and have been reading these with interest. I am vehemently against any bitching comments, but really interested in the debate here.

I have a public Instagram account. It's tiny, but I have seen friends get built up, and shot down, over the last few months over freebies and disclosure. I have people who are friends, that don't declare freebies - it's only when I see others in our hobby circle with the same thing on the same day I realise. Though people are becoming more switched on. I have received items myself for free - and it's flattering - but tbh it is obvious when i do a post about something #gifted as opposed to self bought, and the engagement isn't there. I am careful to only engage with companies I currently purchase from.

My account is public but never features my children's faces. Every now and then they are mentioned, but never their names, nor front shots. Backs of heads is a favourite. I think even those who are now avid friends and followers would struggle to tell you their names and ages. Which is why my account is public.

I follow someone through a hobby with thousands of followers. Her children are always in her stories, I would be able to tell you their names, their school, what they got told off for again last night. It really really unnerves me, being someone who's done child protection training.

With regard to MPs post, I think a lot of it is change because the posters have changed. Those that followed MOD or MP a year or so ago, they didn't follow for how their content is now. People followed MOD/FOD (not singling them out, but just as an example) for their posts, but in the last twelve months they've been eclipsed by holidays and adverts. And their followers have gone up so drastically, you're going to of course get a lot more opinions than a small account would.

Personally there's no way I could afford to buy a scamp and dude jumper. And seeing the small number of instamums I follow all wearing them, just makes them a little more unrelatable whilst I sit in a new look special. Am I tempted to buy a £20 t-shirt for the mummysocial charity campaign, which I can't afford, in a chance of featuring in a post? Of course, and that's why it will be wonderful and thrive. But instead I'll chuck £5 in a charity pot.

Sorry, that was a few days worth of reading these threads coming out in one go 😂

[IsThisAWindUp]

@wizardswife79, that's the problem with how this form of marketing has evolved. Companies like boden and topshop encourage people to post using their hashtags, even saying things like they may be featured on their wall - which would be pretty cool huh? I have a friend who uses the bodenbyme hashtag and I can categorically say she is not sponsored by Boden. It's only when you realise that actually the people that end up on the wall are actually being paid or gifted stuff to promote it that you feel like a bit of a dupe because you have been playing along with the whole hashtag thing the whole time not realising other people were being paid to do it.

That's why the old blogger excuse of tagging gifted stuff means they have disclosed it is bogus, because simply tagging something isn't a clear indication that you paid or were sent the stuff for free.

[IsThisAWindUp]

Really interesting hearing from all the bloggers that are following the thread and making very valuable contributions to the discussion.

[BlueSapp]

ChocolateTea your totaly right, I don't want to spend money on inflated value stuff to fit in, and that's where I think the whole thing is so dangerous as well, some people are spending money to fit in,( £40 for a kids jumper they will grow out of in less than 3 months is nuts) and that money is not disposable and they end up in debt because the "have" to have all the EB stuff or whatever else is trending. Its as bad as gambling really you are reaching people who may be much more vulnerable to the persuasion than others its not right.

[ChocolateTea]

I know that was something @bluesapp that Clemmie Telford touched on last week, and it's a difficult balance. She posted in her stories about a company now selling baby clothes through ocado. £21 for a babygrow! I was shocked - i could buy three packs of six from Asda for that. However, should she stop sharing stuff she can afford and does buy, because some of her followers can't? No, I don't think she should. However, it should be clear if she is promoting a company in exchange for something (in this case I don't think she was)

I just ignore the stories asking for holiday ideas from a few - long haul for Easter ideas please - simply as I know they're in a different league with their finances than me. And actually, if they are in a different financial position, is them asking for recommendations any different from me asking for a cheap hotel recommendation for London on a Saturday night, which is my demographic 😂 Again, if they are paying, no it's no different. If they are gifted? Yes, it's misleading. And there are some instagram users who post for various recommendations as a way of getting a company to give them something heavily discounted or free, which could be construed as a little underhand if not declared.

[Stellastartsitall]

Exactly this term "influencer" you are influencing people. Surely that has some moral responsibility. But it seems maybe not according to the grabby influencers. Not that I hold them responsible for a person getting into debt for trying to keep up with the false inclusivity of the Instagram mum tribe. Its society as a whole, we are causing so much damage with this constant unsustainable consumerism and consumption.

[puppower]

I miss those days sad I miss the old IG. I hate the new algorithm, not because I care about people missing my posts, but why is Instagram deciding what posts I see and don't see.

I blame fucking, bastard Facebook

Yep

[Goingovertosusanshouse]

I managed to get myself into a right financial pickle during my maternity leave. I was sucked in by instagram, still paying the price now. I’m a grown woman, I was always sensible with money but I really fucked up. It’s only now I realise that so many of these baby clothes/items/holidays were gifted. I couldn’t keep up and felt shitty about it. I’ve manage to come back from it but many wouldn’t be able to. The transparency is needed, it’s just not a lifestyle a lot of us can lead. It helps to know that these are freebies so we don’t keep beating ourselves up about it.

[Babaloo88]

@goingovertosusanshouse do you have IG still? If so please write this message under MOD’s reply to MP’s post!

[Goingovertosusanshouse]

I don’t. I got rid because it was making me depressed and questioning every choice I made. I still feel so stupid, I have real life friends but it was like a little escape. Looking back I realise how damaging it was and I don’t know how or why it happened!

[Stellastartsitall]

Exactly, just seen the frugality put up a very clear ad on stories which is great. But there's a pic on her profile with a lot of tagged products. I don't know whether to assume if those are bought and paid for. Or freebies which should carry a Ad declaration. Clear this up to your followers cos the cynic in me thinks it was all free. So shouldn't be promoted without clarity. I won't say this on her page because I'll be accused as a hater and not supporting women. For ffs

[blackmirror1]

I wouldn't say it's free because it's tagged - like how I can just tag my mate into a picture, theyre just tagging so you know where stuff is from. Would fully expect Frugality to #ad or #gift stuff.

So no, tagging should not be because it's free. Tagging is fine but if it IS free it should be labelled as such