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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Email read receipt requests: Are you for or against?

69 replies

MrsCrabbyTree · 22/03/2018 05:17

There is a person in my life who is getting on my goat. Every email has one. I am an adult. I don't need monitoring for everyday emails or anything for that matter.

(A little background for context. This is a semi business relationship. Yesterday in the mail I received 3 pages of information from this person, (I don't need it or require it but in their opinion I do) then this morning there was an email with the same 3 pages attached and the dreaded read email request.)

I now consider this person rude and controlling and it's causing me to behave like a petulant child.

So guys and gals, what do you think about read receipts? AIBU?

OP posts:
Lacucuracha · 22/03/2018 20:45

Read receipts are so 90s. They would make you look like a dick now. What industry does this oerson work in, OP?

NoWordForFluffy · 22/03/2018 20:51

Read receipts are very helpful for me to prove to the court that my opposing party has been ignoring me if I need to make an application to get them to send what I've asked for / chased!

bigbluebus · 22/03/2018 21:48

I used to deal with someone who always requested read receipts for no apparent reason - so I always clicked 'no' to the receipt request. Just another unecessary and annoying 'pop up' in my opinion.

MilliesCookies22 · 22/03/2018 21:56

I used to deal with someone who always requested read receipts for no apparent reason
It wouldn't have been them requesting it - it would have been the email programme doing it automatically without human intervention

C8H10N4O2 · 22/03/2018 22:16

Read receipts are very helpful for me to prove to the court that my opposing party has been ignoring me if I need to make an application to get them to send what I've asked for / chased!

Except they don't prove that. I'm astonished and disappointed if any court accepts read receipts (or lack of them) as evidence since many mail servers disable them.

itstimeforanamechange · 23/03/2018 08:58

Read receipts are very helpful for me to prove to the court that my opposing party has been ignoring me if I need to make an application to get them to send what I've asked for / chased

Really? All they prove is that the email has been opened (or indeed, if you have a preview pane switched on, just passing your mouse over the email in your inbox list would mark it as read).

I used to work with people who used read receipts all the time, so I set up my email inbox so I had a column which said whether they'd set an email receipt or not, and deliberately didn't open the ones that did until I was ready! Maybe a bit childish but I saw and see no need for them.

If the system is requesting them automatically you can normally turn it off or refuse to send one, and otherwise you know if your organisation has an automatic request system.

Palegreenstars · 23/03/2018 09:27

I refuse to let the fact that someone knows I’ve read their email or msg dictate the time frame I respond in. So don’t mind if they know I’ve read it.

This and not deleting / sorting my inbox has revolutionised the way I work. I can spend more time doing actual work and have become more productive.

BarbaraofSevillle · 23/03/2018 11:11

Read receipts are pointless and prove nothing except that the email may have been briefly opened.

Says nothing about whether someone has actually noted the contents or when they plan to reply.

Intrigued as to your method green. I find a full inbox stressful and worry that important stuff is going to get lost and forgotten amongst the chaff. Someone also likened leaving all your emails in the inbox to leaving physical post on the doormat, so how does it help you keep on top of things and work for you?

Confusedbeetle · 23/03/2018 11:18

I think it is courteous to reply or acknowledge an email straight away. A read receipt is just an easy way to do this, there are often occasions when you need to know a person has had some info

Grilledaubergines · 23/03/2018 11:52

My phone, my email etc are for my benefit. I ignore requests for read receipts and have read receipts switched off on texts/WhatsApp etc. I’ll respond when I choose to.

Palegreenstars · 23/03/2018 14:21

@barbara I might do the post thing too!

I used the dot to highlight stuff that needs action as soon as it arrives and keep an ongoing to do list.

I don’t think it works for everyone but my work emails are bonkers.

Mynewnameforabit · 23/03/2018 14:42

And I would judge people badly for requesting if it's a run of the mill email.
All this annoyance seems based on an assumption that the sender is trying to rush you to respond, thats not necessarily the case, i think you're taking it too personally!

I use them sometimes for work, and I just want evidence that it got there (as another poster said, some servers mess up quite often..). Also, in the rare case that the person never does what the email asked, I want to be able to show, weeks or months later, that I asked, and they got the request. The alternative is people denying they ever had any email, and me being held responsible... which has happened several times...
They don't bother me at work, I work hard, and I don't prioritise things just because of a read receipt.

For personal emails I'd find it odd and annoying tho (but have never had this)!

Mynewnameforabit · 23/03/2018 14:46

Read receipts are very helpful for me to prove to the court that my opposing party has been ignoring me if I need to make an application to get them to send what I've asked for / chased

Really? All they prove is that the email has been opened
That is exactly what is needed though, isn't it?! Proof that they had access to it, but did not respond.

Mynewnameforabit · 23/03/2018 14:51

Except they don't prove that. I'm astonished and disappointed if any court accepts read receipts (or lack of them) as evidence since many mail servers disable them.
I think you're confused.
A read receipt is pretty good evidence of receipt, I see no reason a court would doubt that.
No read receipt, could be because the recipient didn't receive, or refused to send one, or they're disabled by their server. But no one goes to court using lack of read receipt as evidence of something, do they?
The fact that sometimes you don't know why you DIDN'T get one, doesn't invalidate having one as evidence of receipt.

Doobigetta · 23/03/2018 15:04

I used to have a colleague who used them on all emails, plus a subject line saying "please read". I set Outlook to send her "messeage deleted without being read" notifications.

MrsCrabbyTree · 26/03/2018 03:44

Hi everyone. Have been a bit off colour and only came on MN briefly over the weekend before I was back in bed.

It appears the consensus is that there is a place for read requests, but in general they are not required and when used unjudiciously are annoying, and thus should can be ignored.

Thank you all for replying and I am quite delighted to know my view is not out of line.

OP posts:
Vitalogy · 26/03/2018 03:54

I think it's bad for mental health so against.

BicycleHorn · 26/03/2018 03:56

AGAINST. It's like our privacy is being sucked right out of our souls, through our keyboard. Let me reply to my email in my own damn time! Same for Facebook messenger, What's app and texts. It's just unnecessary!

In specific circumstances during work possibly... but apart from that, nope!

DameSquashalot · 22/01/2019 13:24

I'm strongly against. I can see why finance people etc use them when they have to chase people for payment and other important issues.

I have disabled them because a work colleague sends them for every day type stuff. Even though I click the 'don't send' option it still makes me feel really stressed. As a PP said, a lot of the time I read the emails, and come back to them later.

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