PLEASE HELP ME RE-ENFORCE MY WOBBLY BACK BONE RE. WORK

[user1483875094]

Hello all, In the past many of you have really helped me with my wobbles! and I need some re-enforcement, and a good kick up the b...side before tomorrow morning! In the past, I have really struggled to get time off work, as it is simply never "convenient". Many of you helped me last time, and I did get somewhere. However, it is my d.d. 30th birthday coming up in May, and I have worked around the clock getting all the 5 branches of her beloved cousins and aunties and uncles together ( a secret) at the same time as finding a country house rental that will house us all, so we can all be together for a dinner party. Finally, we all succeeded, all the beloved family free, and the house we wanted. Spoke to my boss to book off the Saturday (I normally work Saturdays, and had already found "cover") and boss wasn't having any of it, as it was "inconvenient" and boss totally expected me to cancel. I wrote an email last night, (very polite and friendly) pointing out how important it was to me and my family, how much work it had been getting all the family together, that I had the Saturday covered, that I am entitled to holiday, that I had given masses of notice, and would hope she would understand. NO response, (which always means she is fuming..... ) WHAT do I do tomorrow when I go back in? I KNOW from history, that I will be made to feel like I am letting everyone down... but this time, I am NOT letting my family down. Not for anything. I suppose I was a coward waiting until I got home and sending an email, but pretty much all the staff feel the same way.. can you put some vertebra in my pathetic back-bone? please? xxx

Just stay clear the the perceived inconvenience does not negate your right to holiday given sufficient notice as cover. Depending on your job market - if plenty of jobs n the area I would consider brinkmanship to drive my point.

We have to have authorisation BEFORE we can book holidays at work, even if we want to fly abroad etc.

However, how does your boss know it will be inconvenient 2 months away?? If you have cover I can;t see what the inconvenience is.

Is there a reason you didn't check availability before setting the date? Presumably, the faffing with family over a date was because they had other commitments too? Why were your commitments not taken into account with theirs?

I once told a boss that I simply wouldn't work on a particular date that he had decided to insist I work as I was getting married and he could either rearrange things or start disciplinary proceedings, but those were his options because I wasn't coming in. That's fairly drastic though and I hadn't arranged my wedding for a date I was already slated to work.

How easy would it be for you to find another job? Because your course of action does partly depend on how precarious your situation is.

You've given ample notice and already arranged cover so I don't see that your boss has a leg to stand on re denying you the time off. I actually applaud you for sending an email simply laying out the facts and emphasising the reasonableness of your request in writing. It's not cowardly, it's actually a very professional way to appeal/follow up the denial of a face to face request. Does your boss have a boss you can appeal to over her headshould she kick off or dig her heels in and refuse again?

For goodness sake woman! Put your big girl pants on tomorrow morning, head up, back straight, deep breath, and walk into work tomorrow confident that you have done nothing wrong. Absolutely nothing. Your boss sounds like a horrendous bully.

Keep calm. You have a legal right to holiday. You've given plenty of notice. You've found cover. You cannot miss this family occasion. Keep calm and keep repeating these facts.

And maybe start looking for another job?

In an ideal world, you would get authorisation for leave before you commit to something. However, it's not always possible and as you've said your boss has a history of being inflexible so I get it.

When you go in tomorrow don't act like you've done anything wrong because you haven't. You've asked for your legally entitled leave, far in advance and have found cover. Smile, approach them, and say 'I was hoping to follow up on my leave for a vital family event, I wanted to ensure I could answer any concerns you had.'

If you're worried then prep - what concerns could they possibly have? Are you the only one that can do your particular job? In which case reassure them that you will have your work up to date until you go and that you will pass over a handover document etc. Don't show any signs of backing down but perhaps ask how they would like you to handle requests for time off in the future.

It is never 'convenient' for any staff member to be off, but if you choose to run a business that is a matter for you as employer to sort out, and not a problem for the staff.

However, we are all entitled to annual leave, provided we comply with whatever rule is put in the handbook about permission etc.

She's probably cross you didn't ask before you booked and got ok'd. Everywhere I've worked has been hot on this, although they've also been happy to accept cover swaps as well. You've covered yours hrs though and given notice and have a right to holiday- but I would guess it's because you've assumed and booked. If your company has rules about how many people are off and or someone has already booked the time off, you may have caused her a headache. Have you checked the company holiday rota?

Go via HR?
Go over her head?

BeUpStanding

I LOVE YOU!!! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!!! xxxxx

To those asking why the OP didn’t book the time off beforehand - something has to come first. Why would she book a date off when she wasn’t sure her family could attend? Or wa she supppsed to tentatively book off all the weekends in May “just in case”?

Good luck tomorrow OP. I have to agree that it might be a matter of saying “sorry but I won’t be in that day”. I’d be extremely surprised if they took it any further. Your boss is being ridiculous, I think you should go over her head and seek support with someone higher up, who can see sense.

As always, you have ALL been very kind and helpful, as I am such a push over, thank you all so far. I know I am headed for a sleepless night... but your comments are very reassuring and helpful, thank you ALL so much! The sad thing is, I LOVE MY JOB! Otherwise, I really would look for another job. I love my colleagues - and they all feel the same, and we all support each other and mutter together about this as they too have the same problems. Boss is very often away for very long weekends, and then we all work together and do incredibly well, and enjoy it. We are a very small company, and so do not have an H.R. department... so we have no one to turn to except each other. x

inconvenient is not a reason for her not to give you the time off. If that was a reason, then you would never get any time off!

You are entitled to holiday time, and you have arranged cover.

How did it go OP?

Hi Penny, and everyone else who helped me with good solid advice and good ideas. I put my "big girl pants on"! head up, cheerful face and cheerful attitude - telling myself all the way to work that I am completely in the right here. I didn't apologise, nor let even the slightest "hint" show, that I might feel I was in the wrong, and actually had a lovely day! Boss said "that's fine about your weekend away" - and actually SENT ME HOME EARLY, because I have a sore throat and a cold... (very unusual) but I think she has trouble climbing back down, and this was her "sorry". So, early night tonight, and a humungous relief. You are all blooming great, you know! Thank you! xx flowers! (don't know how to make the flowers appear!)