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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

neighbour is blatent lier

19 replies

user1472402339 · 20/03/2018 13:15

Bit of background my ndn and I have had issues in the past, I built an extension asked her showed plans etc before it went ok, she then proceeded to be as difficult as possible the whole while even phoning e parents to complain at one point !(it was nothing to do with them at all my house) anyway came to the conclusion she was jealous as she went onto build a matching extension soon after, even using the same plan guy. Ever since we have had a bad relationship.
After a few days of diy noise last night I decided to politely have a word as there was drilling noise coming up to 8pm and my kids need to settle for bed, I ring ndn bell in-between drilling noise and start to say to ndn "I know try are not normally noisy at night.... To be cut off by her telling me its not them its two next door but one, to which I answer oh thats bad I feel sorry for you. I god to listen at two door down nothing so I go back into my house and can hear ndn through wall and then no more noises at all, this morning evidence of diy taken in their car to the tip - why lie to my face !! I feel so annoyed by being taken as a fool

OP posts:
Booboobooboo84 · 20/03/2018 13:23

Maybe they lied to avoid confrontation from you. Just let it go

AverageSnowflake · 20/03/2018 13:26

What is the question?

Original poster
user1472402339 · 20/03/2018 13:30

I guess the question is am I right to be feeling soo annoyed by this.

OP posts:
PerryPerryThePlatypus · 20/03/2018 13:33

Maybe they didn't want a row with you on their doorstep?

BeeFarseer · 20/03/2018 13:35

They lied. So what? The drilling stopped.

Why are you so bothered by this?

GnotherGnu · 20/03/2018 13:41

It really isn't reasonable to expect people not to drill coming up to 8 p.m.

Original poster
user1472402339 · 20/03/2018 13:43

I guess I expected them to be reasonable and just say ok we are nearly done, or just sorry? I forget that they are not really ever reasonable, and feel stupid for believing a lie

OP posts:
ThePinkOcelot · 20/03/2018 13:44

I don’t think 8 pm is late tbh.

BertrandRussell · 20/03/2018 13:56

Why does it matter?

RatherBeRiding · 20/03/2018 14:10

Drilling stopped - result. Perhaps she is aware that your relationship isn't great so didn't want to get into an argument on her doorstep.

I also don't think 8pm is at all unreasonable. After 9 - yes I'd be annoyed, but I wouldn't think twice about a bit of DIY at 8pm myself tbh.

YellowFlower201 · 20/03/2018 14:16

The drilling stopped so you got what you wanted. Maybe she didn't want a confrontation... Anyway 8pm isn't really very late.

January87 · 20/03/2018 14:27

8pm is not late for drilling. YABU

thecatneuterer · 20/03/2018 14:28

I would consider drilling up to around 9.30pm to be normal and acceptable. Most people don't get home till around 7pm and that doesn't leave much time to do stuff. Yes some people have children, and plenty have other issues that mean noise would be a problem, just as night workers would have a problem with daytime drilling, but that doesn't mean people need to change their behaviour as a result, especially if it's only an occasional thing.

And I expect she lied to avoid confrontation.

Just forget about it.

VodkaAndRusschian · 20/03/2018 14:28

I agree with pps. They wanted to avoid confrontation and stopped the noise immediately. YABU to be annoyed about that.

PyongyangKipperbang · 20/03/2018 14:56

I think the trouble is that when you have fallen out with someone who has been an asshole in the past, you automatically assume they are being an asshole again! I had this with my ex neighbours. They really were dickheads, in the end the council warned them that either they behaved or would be taken to court for anti social behaviour. She was a real Hyacinth so threats of an ASBO seemed to do the trick!

Then there was an issue which genuinely wasnt their fault, but I went into orbit about it, assumingit was more fucking about. I was wrong and the very worst bit? I had to apologise to the people who had made our lives hell for several years. Shock They deserved the apology, but I cant say i didnt really hurt me to give it, especially as I had never received one from them for what they did to us.

ZoeWashburne · 20/03/2018 14:58

Can and should are different words. Of course you can be annoyed by this, but really, should you? Why bother? It just seems like you are waisting time and energy thinking about someone you don't really get on with, and you got the result you wanted. Move on.

Original poster
user1472402339 · 20/03/2018 15:06

Thank you Pyongyang I think you hit the nail on the head I'm struggling to separate this one thing from all the other petty things we've had from them in the past and I am being a bit unreasonable as they did shut up, I just need to shake the feeling of annoyance, anyone else probably wouldn't have bothered me and I would only have been a bit puzzled if they lied.

OP posts:
AgathaF · 20/03/2018 16:01

If they do it repeatedly then sure, feel annoyed. But as a one-off, and not even particularly late, then I think you need to let it go.

Jlo7 · 16/07/2018 13:32

are the elderly? any time my DH does a bit of DIY (appropriate times of the day) either drilling or hammering, my ndn the next day at 6am starts knocking on the wall to our bedroom or around 7am starts drilling or bannging something. even if we're in the garden or on our drive doing something he has to come out to see, pretending to go to his car or doing the bins and he is constantly lettin his dog poo on my drive but i never say anything. i swear old people are weird, they get the hump over silly things

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