Should I ask my new lodger to leave?

[Pugmummy92]

I have recently taken on a male lodger much older than me, he’s in his fifties (I’m 25). I own my own home, just me and my pug living here, and have previously rented one of my single rooms out.

My new lodger only moved in last week, paying two weeks’ rent as he wanted to have an initial trial period. However, since moving in, he appears to have moved half a house worth of belongings with him, despite only renting a very small single room! He has now occupied most of the garden shed, several kitchen cupboards (it was only agreed to have one cupboard and half the fridge), half the understairs cupboard and half my third bedroom too! He is also leaving the heating on constant (even when he’s not at home!)

Another reason for me taking on a lodger was to look after my pug a couple of nights a week, and to feed him should he finish work earlier. He is home earlier than me every day of the week so the agreement was that he feed my dog and let him out etc. before I’m home. He seems to be quite reluctant to do this now he has moved in and has quite a standoffish attitude towards looking after my dog, despite claiming to be a dog lover himself!

AIBU to give him notice at the end of his two weeks’ trial period??

He’s not very easy to talk about problems with, and makes me feel like I am the one creating problems already even after just one week. I just don’t know if I can stand living with someone who takes over the entire house and all my free space, and has no regard for my ever increasing house bills, and isn’t keen on looking after my dog?

Advice please! X

[Pugmummy92]

Of course these things still happen, you can safeguard against all the eventualities in the world, but there’s no accounting for someone else’s ignorance, utter cheek or personality sometimes, no matter whether you come from a legal background or not. X

[Sparklesocks]

You tried it, it’s not a good fit, it was very much highlighted it was a trial period - I think perfectly reasonable to shake hands and part ways.

You should read this about a not so lucky landlord with the worst lodger of all time!!
nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2018/02/jamison-bachman-worst-roommate-ever.html

[bunbunny]

Has he paid up for the next month's rent yet - when would he normally expect to pay it in advance for the next month?

It might be worth talking to him now and saying that it's not working and you would like him and his stuff out of your house at the end of the trial period. You know that you had everything drawn up properly and feel that you ought to give him a month after his trial but it would be worth asking in a matter of fact way and just saying something along the lines of 'but you asked for a two week trial and paid for a two week trial - it works both ways' and seeing what he says... He might say no, your signed tenancy agreement says I can stay for the first month in which case you have to reluctantly agree But he might say OK and move out or maybe bargain an earlier move out date in which case you would be better off (in terms of him not being there at least!).

Also - you say you didn't explicitly say that he couldn't leave stuff in other parts of the house - you did agree with him that he could put a couple of boxes in your spare room and his bike somewhere (sorry, can't remember exactly where!). You could again point out that as you made specific cases of those things that could be stored out of his room and designated kitchen cupboard, that it should be obvious that everything else should be in his room.

Tell him that you need him to put everything from your spare room into his room tonight please, as you need to use the room (even if you just want to hang out some washing or sit in there to read or anything to be in there for a short while tonight and tomorrow). If he complains, point out that he isn't renting that room, he is renting the smaller room. And that you'd like all his things taken out of the shed and everything else that isn't in his room (or the specific bits that you agreed to separately) needs to go - whether he pays to put it in storage or takes it to a friend's house or puts it in his car or whatever - it's irrelevant to you - but at no point did you agree to have any of this extra stuff in your property and so he needs to remove it asap.

Hopefully if you make it as difficult as possible while still being very polite and professional and not a pushover, then he will get annoyed that you're not letting him take over the whole house as he was hoping and get fed up tripping over everything in his room and want out asap.

And then if you ever have another lodger - make sure that the next agreement has a trial period and that you're able to call a halt to it much earlier than you can now, as well as insist that people only get to put their stuff in their room or agreed kitchen cupboard.

And definitely a line about turning the heating off while he's out, and keeping it at 20 (or whatever you feel comfortable at). Remember to point this out to him too tonight...

[tameka]

My sister had a nightmare lodger who was a twenty something policeman!

She was too scared to ask him to leave even though he came home pissed in the early hours whenever he wasn't on shift & kept the entire block of flats awake.

Finally he emigrated.

Don't be like my sister, get this man out!

[Pugmummy92]

Thanks @bunbunny that’s really helpful! I have just got home and he’s brought another armful of stuff back with him this afternoon.. I will try and speak to him this week if I can find someone to be there with me! X

[teaandtoast]

He sounds like a hoarder. Where is he getting all this stuff?

[condepetie]

Tell him now, not at the end of the two weeks. Please don't give him any more time than he needs/is in your contract - can't your partner be with you when you tell him?

[bastardkitty]

You could test the water by asking him not to bring any more stuff to the house. Just to get a feel for how he might react.

[SingaSong12]

Give notice. Even if on here your thinking is "get rid" be business like. Have someone with you, give him something in writing to back it up. If you work in this type of thing I'm sure you know wording. Make sure you set a specific date that he must leave by, in the letter and verbally. Given the situation I wouldn't negotiate at all.
If he doesn't leave on the set date you can get the police to make him go.

[Cuppaoftea]

Finding it difficult to understand why you're allowing him to move more and more stuff in and take over your home.

Honestly, you don’t sound assertive enough to be taking in any lodger.

Get your partner round tonight, return the two weeks rent to your lodger and inform him he needs to leave in the morning. This is an unsafe situation.

[puffyisgood]

It's a shame when things like this don't work out, but it seems that this hasn't, be as nice about it as you can whilst reclaiming firm, this just isn't the right match for you.

[RebeccaBunchLawyer]

boxthefox, Pacific Heights is a great film- a bit over the top, but I love the melodrama of the films from the ‘80s. They don’t make films like that anymore!

OP, tell him he is no longer welcome because the trial has not worked and he is no longer welcome. I have been the longer that had shite landlady/lord/family, and I basically begged to leave them due to noise etc, but that’s another story. I wish I’d found a landlady like you- i brimming well love pugs!

[FlashTheSloth]

He clearly has more stuff stashed somewhere OP, tell him now before he brings even more in. Given he is doing it gradually, he may struggle to move it all back out again in one go when he has to leave.

[Tistheseason17]

You're in the trial period - this is the time to tell him to leave. Don't leave it, otherwise, you are making him think he will then have 4 wks notice if you keep leaving it.

Just tell him it's not working asap.

[UrgentExitRequired]

Get rid of him. I would ask a friend to be there when you have the conversation just to give you a bit of support.

[letsdolunch321]

Agree with all other posters .... get rid asap and make sure he takes all his crap with him ...... The cheeky git

[LanguidLobster]

I guess if he's in his fifties he has probably accumulated a flat's worth of stuff. I wouldn't be able to move into just one room nowadays! He should have said at the outset though.

Hope it goes well getting him to go.

[Shinycat]

Agree. YANBU. Tell him you don't want him to stay. You don't have to give any reason. 'Lodgers' have very few rights.

[Stroller15]

It doesn't sound good OP - hope all goes well when you tell him and he leaves quickly and easily! You're in the trial period so I agree with posters saying to tell him to leave now.
I had a short term lodger who brought so much stuff into the house, it was incredible really! He was always at home but rarely did any cleaning etc. In the end it was such a mission to get him out even though the agreed time was up, it was one problem after the other of why he couldn't move on that day etc. Good luck!

[bunbunny]

What did you put into the agreement about the trial period - if he didn't like it in that 2 week period what was going to happen? Was he just going to move out at the end of the 2 weeks or was he going to stay for 4 weeks or something else?

Did you give yourself equivalent 'exit from agreement during trial period rights'? In which case definitely use them.

Any chance you can go into the spare room now to get or check something - to trigger a conversation about not putting stuff in there tonight and asking him to move it to his room?

It's just that if he is bringing more and more stuff back to your house then it sounds more and more likely that he is not planning on leaving at the end of the trial period so the sooner you can say something the better.

If he is emptying a house or similar he may be getting a carload again tomorrow after work.... and more the next night and the next...

Good luck - remember time is going to be of the essence!

[AskBasil]

If I were you I'd ask your boyfriend to come round and stay at your place for the remainder of the time this lodger is going to be in your house.

You can also tell the lodger that everything needs to be out of the spare room as you need it for a friend who will be staying from now - your boyf.

Tell him this when your boyf is there, so he can't talk you out of it.

You need to develop your assertiveness skills.

[Pugmummy92]

@bunbunny - I hadn’t actually mentioned prior to him moving in about any trial period. The agreement stands at 4 weeks’ notice by either party at any time during the agreement. It was only on moving in day he gave me two weeks’ cash saying it would be to cover a trial period. Me being happy to finally have another lodger and to have some rental income coming in agreed to it on the basis that he pays the next months’ rent in advance at the end of the “trial period”.

I’ve not had problems with being assertive with lodgers previously, but I don’t get a very welcoming vibe from this one, and you never really know how someone will react to hearing news they don’t like! X

[llangennith]

You have my sympathy OP.
Good luck with the eviction.
Did you get any references for the lodger? Did you ask his previous landlord what kind of tenant he was?

[Pugmummy92]

I wish I could have my partner stay with me during the week @AskBasil but it just wouldn’t work due to work commitments etc. X

[Pugmummy92]

@llangennith - I telephoned his employer for a reference but not his previous landlady as he hadn’t been there very long at all and figured she wouldn’t have too much of a feel for the kind of person he was. She lived in a very large house with ample space for his belongings by the sounds of it and he has been rather spoilt for space I think! I also feel he’s been very much used to doing what he likes over the years! X