To want unbiased appearance advice

[Wallabaloo]

Aibu to want to meet someone who has nothing to sell and no emotional involvement (i.e. Not a friend) who can genuinely tell me what I need to do with my face. There is a particular issue I'm concerned about dh tells me nobody notices but I just want someone who has never met me before to see me in person and tell me what I look like to others. Also just in general terms. Aibu is there a website for this?

I don't think there's a website for it and if there is you'd probably get some very unkind comments.

You can PM me, if you want a stranger's take.

Why don't you post your pic on here without telling us what the issue is and we can see if it's obvious?

What about nurse/ GP? Or ask him random people. I can’t think of a website that does that but you can only try... you could always put up a photo for us?

Thanks - I want t do it in person! As I can look bad and good in photos

May I ask what part of your face? Only cos I had a similar issue and therefore appreciate what you’re saying about needing a stranger’s opinion and a camera possibly being deceptive. I got my issue sorted.

user, do you really think this is the role of a nurse or GP - to comment on someone’s appearance?!

Peachy, it could be. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t go to the dr for the sole purpose of asking “can you see this, is it noticeable?”, but I went for a chat about the objective problem of it, and also asked how they thought I looked with the issue.

Some plastic surgeons do free consultations...

Attractiveness is subjective though. Tbh if you walk up to a random stranger in the street and ask...you may either get an unbiased honest opinion or a polite and embarrassed - nope not sure what you mean type of response

I wouldn't use a plastic surgeon as an unbiased option for a free consult - they'll be trying to sell a service and that will colour their opinions

Your DH is happy with you. You're obviously anxious about something though, how badly does it affect your confidence? Regardless of anyone else's opinions, can you live with it? Or would having something done massively improve your confidence?

I wouldn't use a plastic surgeon as an unbiased option for a free consult - they'll be trying to sell a service and that will colour their opinions

Yes, they will very politely make you feel rubbish about yourself.

It's likely people don't notice as much as you. Is it something you can make less obvious with a different hair style or make up? I'm not sure you'll get what you want because I get the feeling if a stranger agrees with your DH you'll think they're just being nice. Even if they don't, it doesn't mean it represents what most people think. It's really down to what you think. I've known people that thought if only I changed X (had a nose job for example) I'd feel so much better about myself. Some do but others don't because it was never really about that.

OP are you the moustache shadow lady? I hope not because I was the majority who honestly could not see a thing. If you are someone else then my apologies.

I was with*

You already know what you think. So unless the face to face stranger agrees with you, you won't believe them.

I am quite a visual person. I can see a lack of symmetry, see when something isn’t straight or as anticipated. Not all people are visual. People like me, I think, are more likely to see whatever it is on you face than people, who are not like me. Idk if this helps you.

Potentially anyone you meet up with will be biased anyway because a caring person won’t want to hurt your feelings even if they are a stranger. Would you consider having some talking therapy to help you come to terms with your appearance? You can talk the issue through with them. A good therapist will be non biased. Perhaps it would be better to consider this first than going under the knife.