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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for a car scrape?

72 replies

winnerwinnerchickendinner10000 · 15/03/2018 20:33

Managed to lightly scrape someones car in a car park today, purely paint damage a hairline scratch and not down to the bare metal.

Had someone scrape my car before bigger than this, down to the metal and getting it repaired at bodyshop was not too expensive

Left my number but had my phone turned off rest of day as I have a night shift tonight - the man whos car i scraped left two messages saying he has gone to his insurance who have given him until lunchtime tomorrow to get the rest of my details. Is it possible he can trace my phone number?

AIBU if I am happy to give him cash but don't want to go through insurance?

First time driver, only passed a few months ago and cannot afford to lose my current ncb and no accident rating.

Curious to find out what others think.

OP posts:
19lottie82 · 15/03/2018 20:45

PS I imagine if he reports you to the police, then they would be able to trace you through your phone number, yes.

frankchickens · 15/03/2018 20:45

So you didnt leave your reg number? If he reports you to the police you are in the shit.
A nice theory but very rare for the Police to take an interest, especially where no-one is injured.

Nicknacky · 15/03/2018 20:47

frank Regadless as to wither or not you think the police will be interested, her responsibilities are laid out in law. I have charged people in similar circumstances. She has failed to provide the details she has required to.

TheWickerWoman · 15/03/2018 20:48

The police wouldnt trace anyone for this, they would tell the man to contact his insurers to investigate. It’s not a police matter, no one was hurt.

Auspiciouspanda · 15/03/2018 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Nicknacky · 15/03/2018 20:50

It is a police matter if she fails to provide details. Section 170 Road Traffic Act 1988.

MyRelationshipIsWeird · 15/03/2018 20:50

Technically you do need to involve your insurers in any case, but I can see why you don't want to. As a new driver I imagine your premium is already very high - with a claim it will likely go up next year, but hopefully that bit more experience will also bring it down a bit so might even out.

As a new driver, I can understand not knowing the etiquette about leaving all your details etc. as he wasn't there to swap with. He should be please you left a number but he probably suspected you were ignoring his calls or had given a fake number, hence being cross and going to his insurer.

TBH, it will cost a few hundred at least to sort out, so any increase on your insurance next year won't necessarily be more than paying outright. I had someone back into me and quotes ranged from £300 to £1200 for the same job. I asked for £600 as an average as I didn't want to take it somewhere they would do a bad job, so depending where he took it to get it fixed he could have ended up asking you for a lot more than necessary.

arethereanyleftatall · 15/03/2018 20:51

It was nice of you to leave your number, so many don't.

I agree with you that it would be so much easier for everyone if you could just give him some cash and call it quits.

It's up to him though, he is allowed to not trust you, he doesn't know you, and go through his insurance.

Samcro · 15/03/2018 20:52

If my car got scraped i would have to go through insurance as its motobilty.
You can't just insist that some one takes cash

Moreisnnogedag · 15/03/2018 20:52

I'm guessing nick may know what they're talking about so I'd go by that. I mean seriously are you intending to change your number? Just call him and don't be an arse about it. Think about how much it could be if you don't give your details, they find out who you are and your insurance company refuse to continue to insure you. You then have to declare that you've had ins declined and will struggle to get any insurance for many years to come.

frankchickens · 15/03/2018 20:56

Regadless as to wither or not you think the police will be interested, her responsibilities are laid out in law. I have charged people in similar circumstances. She has failed to provide the details she has required to.
That sounds particularly vindictive considering the OP was at least trying to do the right thing. Lesson - don't bother leaving a number next time, great Policing.

TheWickerWoman · 15/03/2018 20:58

She left details - her number, ideally yes her name and address etc would be good but for a scratch surely it’s a bit dodgy leaving all that info on a windscreen?

the mistake she’s made is not picking up the phone and getting it sorted.

Op, I don’t understand why you wouldn’t have got straight on the phone to him when you picked up your messages?

Nicknacky · 15/03/2018 20:58

How is it vindictive? Great, she has left a phone number but she shouldn’t be applauded for doing the bare minimum, particularly when she hasn’t fulfils her responsibilities.

Nicknacky · 15/03/2018 21:00

thewickerman She had another option. She contacts the police and she tells them she has been involved in an accident where she cannot contact the owner and she will be asked to go to her local office with her documents.

Saz1995 · 15/03/2018 21:01

I would have gone through insurance too, I know accidents happen but it's the consequences.

bridgetreilly · 15/03/2018 21:01

YABU. You are in the wrong. He has every right to sound 'sharp' on the phone, given that you (a) damaged his car and (b) didn't leave the right details. It's his choice whether to go through insurance, but either way you need to speak to him.

PoisonousSmurf · 15/03/2018 21:03

You HAVE TO DECLARE any accidents even if not making a claim!

pigshavecurlytails · 15/03/2018 21:03

pigshavecurlytails , how is that possible if i just left a phone number though?

ok, if you refuse at this stage to give any more details, he'll go to the police with your phone number. so when they track you down, you'll be done for not giving information as well. how is that going to help?

Saz1995 · 15/03/2018 21:08

Plus your idea of a little damage old be completely different to his/insurance. Someone went into the side of my car last year and they kept wanting to give me money saying theirs little damage and would give me £200 for it hahahaha no wasn't happening, I went through insurance, oh no their was £1900 worth of damage to my car.

BoomBoomsCousin · 15/03/2018 21:10

if you refuse at this stage to give any more details, he'll go to the police with your phone number. so when they track you down, you'll be done for not giving information as well. how is that going to help?

^^ This.

Yes, you can be tracked through your phone number, unless you've dodged the requirements to register your phone. If your phone company have your details, the insurance company and the police will be able to get them too.

Original poster
winnerwinnerchickendinner10000 · 15/03/2018 21:12

without giving too much away our cars are both from the same dealership with an approved bodyspray branch. hence why i offered cash

ive text him now anyway.

thanks for all the replies everyone, some of you i do wonder if you're so perfect in real life...

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 15/03/2018 21:14

Not perfect, not at all. I just wouldn’t shy away from my responsibilities.

Laiste · 15/03/2018 21:14

How much cash were you thinking of offering OP?

50 quid? 100? 200? Are you bunging him a bit more for a rental car for the day while his is in the paint shop?

Supposing he gets back to you and says his garage says the whole panel will need respraying - so £500/600. Happy with that? Plus the rental car ... ?

Just go through the bloomin' insurance.

SimonBridges · 15/03/2018 21:14

Hang on a minute.
You say
Had someone scrape my car before bigger than this, down to the metal and getting it repaired at bodyshop was not too expensive

But then you say,

only passed a few months ago

Do you mean that in the few months you’ve been driving you have had two scrapes?

Saz1995 · 15/03/2018 21:15

Were not acting like were perfect, don't ask if you don't like the answer lol