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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to think ‘Resting Can I Help You? Face’ is a real thing?

139 replies

Bebepoor · 15/03/2018 15:49

And does not receive the attention it deserves.

Honestly. Strangers ask for directions and tell me about their health problems. Acquaintances pour out their hearts to me. Friends tell me things I really wish I didn’t know. People moan about Resting Bitch Face but my affliction is much greater. Any other sufferers?

OP posts:
lovesugarfreejelly63 · 15/03/2018 17:53

Often stopped by strangers asking me what the time is. Am I the only person who wears a watch? Also a wearer of glasses.

FeeLock28 · 15/03/2018 17:54

Yesss! I get this on trains all the time - I've learnt to sit on the outside now for this very reason.

AJPTaylor · 15/03/2018 17:56

yes. both me and dh have this.
in the days before selfies we were in new york in front of manhatten, the view ftom ellis island
8 people in row asked if he would take their photo. its a mixture of his height, general air if competence and the fact that he looks unlikely to nick your camera

i get asked for directions/help all the time.

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser · 15/03/2018 18:02

Yes! This is me!

People on trains tell me their life story. People in the street ask to borrow my phone to call their mum/boyfriend/friend. I am always asked for directions even though I have no idea.

I think it's because I'm small and unintimidating.

ScreamingValenta · 15/03/2018 18:06

I'm another (and I wear glasses). I often get asked to 'watch' people's bags in public places - how do they know I'm not a thief? I also often get asked for directions - I have a poor sense of direction and can't drive - it's sometimes dawned on me after the event that I have sent some poor driver the wrong way down a wrong way street because I'm used to walking down it Blush. I'm shy and wish I had a resting 'keep your distance' face.

ScreamingValenta · 15/03/2018 18:07

The wrong way down a one^ way street, that is!

scortja · 15/03/2018 18:31

This sounds soo nice!

I have what has been described as a 'bitch, fuck off' face

Noup · 15/03/2018 18:34

I have resting "please tell me about your fantasy novel" face. I hate fantasy novels.

DSHathawayGivesMeFannyGallops · 15/03/2018 18:45

Yep. Been told it's because I have a "can I help you?" air from retail. And I wear specs. I'd say I look purposeful rather than friendly though, especially if I'm walking marching! DP gets it as well, I suspect because he has a proper sunshine smile and wears a suit. So he looks nice and responsible.

goforkyourself · 15/03/2018 18:49

Lol Snowmageddon Grin All you specs-wearers need to get laser treatment Wink

I had a Russian woman asking me something yesterday but as I only know three words in Russian I couldn't really help her. She was very persistent and eventually flounced off, leaving me Confused

DontCallMeCharlotte · 15/03/2018 18:55

Me too! I had just arrived in Paris for the first time and no fewer than four people asked me for directions. Amazingly I was able to help them all. In fairness I was wearing a smart new hat as well as The Face.

Runs off to join Parisiennes de Mamansnet on S&B

Jakadaal · 15/03/2018 18:56

This is me! People always think I’m a nurse ... I’m not Grin

The best time was when an elderly lady stopped me on holiday and said she had lost her hotel! I’d only arrived an hour before. I did manage to find her hotel for her and got her back safe and sound.

I also wear glasses 🤓

YesitsJacqueline · 15/03/2018 19:08

The other day the train was packed and the only space was down by the loo. Now this was , as I said, a busy train, lots of people . But a young guy walked towards the loo - looked at me and said " is somebody in there?" , I don't know I said. He tried the door and it wouldn't open, he looked at me again and said " well there must be someone in there!" , I shrugged my shoulders and nodded and looked away. Then eventually he looked at me and said accusingly " see - there was no one on there!" . I got fed up at this point and said " I'm not the gatekeeper of the toilet you know!"

YesitsJacqueline · 15/03/2018 19:09

That should read he eventually got the door open

PencilledIn · 15/03/2018 19:12

I think I have this! It's a thing. I'm such a people pleaser.

Abra1de · 15/03/2018 19:14

I have it too. A random Spanish woman once approached when I was in NYC on holiday and asked me whether I knew where she could buy Farrow and Ball wallpaper. 🧐

Shinycat · 15/03/2018 19:16

I think I must be a horrible cunt, because when strangers start blathering about their life's problems, I couldn't give a fucking shit.

I am a horrible cunt aren't I? Confused

ComeOnGordon · 15/03/2018 19:20

I wear specs & I’m another one who people always ask for help.
I’m doing some work experience just now, I have no idea where anything is and I’m not in uniform but at least 2 people a day ask me for help getting what they need. But I like to help so have no plans to change my resting face

MrsJimmyPerez · 15/03/2018 19:25

Not only do I have this, I am ridiculously often mistaken for other people. I mean, people call out 'my' name but then realise I'm not who they thought I was, people ask 'aren't you so-and-so's friend' 'don't you work at wherever' or just 'where do I know you from?' I've decided I must just be a type. Odd because I feel very individual and that I don't really fit in anywhere!

ScreamingValenta · 15/03/2018 19:31

I remember a period where I was seated next to one of the printers at work. I spent more time helping people fix the printer, locate paper jams, change toner etc. than actually doing my own job. I was seriously considering adding 'printer technician' to my CV Grin.

goforkyourself · 15/03/2018 19:33

I think I also have a 'Can I help you?' voice. I had a phonecall at work on Saturday morning from a random woman asking if I could help her retrieve her passport from a local bank; she'd accidentally left it there and wanted my help to get it back as she was flying out that evening. I was really polite and sympathetic but explained there was nothing I could do (the company I work for has nothing to do with this) She kept me on the bloody phone for ten minutes!

I blame the counselling course I did 20 years ago - I was trained to use the 'warm and open face/voice' so it's probably never left me Confused

GummyGoddess · 15/03/2018 19:33

Is there a resting 'single person on public transport' face too? I am constantly harassed by men who like to tell me about my eyes or that I have a beautiful soul whenever I take public transport alone. Never happens anywhere else and I am not stunningly beautiful/staring out the window/smiling at people. Always tried to look busy to deter.

It was the main reason I wanted to pass my driving test!

Faintlinesquints · 15/03/2018 19:36

Yup! My mum, dd1 and I are very similar in this respect, we call it our 'auntie' face!
No matter where I am or who I talk to, I guarantee I come away with so many people's life stories! It seems like people (even strangers!) feel comforatable enough talking about their biggest worries, and asking for advice. It's endearing I guess, but can be rather draining!
My dd came home from an after school activity all worried about a lady at the bus stop. She'd had a recent cancer scare, and her sons reluctance to help she hadn't seen him in 3 months! Dd wanted to go round and visit her because she didn't have anyone else - sweet, but dd will soon realise...

PanPanPanPing · 15/03/2018 19:38

I don't think I ever had a RestingBitchFace in my younger years, but since my Mum died, some years ago, I appear to have inherited her Resting-Can-I-Help-You face Grin

On the whole, I quite enjoy it. But I am getting older and probably turning into my Mum anyway! I've had some lovely conversations with random people in shops - or wherever - about 'stuff'!

MrTumblesSpottyHag · 15/03/2018 19:41

I have resting Tell Me Things face I think. People (randoms in queues/vague acquaintances/friends of friends) tell me Things. Intimate Things.