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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Any advice gratefully received

17 replies

Chickenlicken15 · 14/03/2018 17:15

Hi I’ve posted on AIBU as it has the most traffic. My husband is having knee surgery soon which will mean he is a knee brace and TOTALLY non weight bearing for 6 weeks . I cannot get my head around how to cope with this on a practical basis. I work part time and can thankfully can work from home but will still need to go into the office at some point most days. I am assuming he will be able to manage the stairs once a day and we do have a downstairs loo.

I guess he can’t go out at all as I can’t get him in the car as his knee will be fixed straight. At the moment he is saying no to s wheelchair but after a week at home I think he will be glad to get out of the house!

I’m no Florence Nightingale and 6 weeks is a long time

All help welcome please !

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/03/2018 17:22

Why is he saying no to a wheelchair? Daft bloke, he'll def want one. How is he doing to get around the house without putting ANY weight on his leg?

Also are there any steps between bedroom and bathroom/toilet upstairs?

Of course you will need to go into the office sometimes, and he should be able to function at home.

What about getting food/eating when you're not there? Do you have a table/chairs in your kitchen that he can use with a fixed straight leg? Also worth getting a trolley on wheels if there is any distance between fridge/cupboards and table.

Invest in thick socks so his foot doesn't get cold.

Erm, hope that helps!

Whatshallidonowpeople · 14/03/2018 17:27

Why non weight bearing?

ThoraCentisis · 14/03/2018 17:38

Why can't he use crutches?

AnyFucker · 14/03/2018 17:40

Does he have disabilities that prevent him from using crutches ?

MatildaTheCat · 14/03/2018 17:41

After a week or so he should be absolutely fine on crutches. He can use a bag or backpack to carry stuff around. He will need lifts or cabs to get out. Food prep sitting down and a stool in the loo to rest his leg on when sitting.

I spent a lot of time totally non weight bearing as a teen and went to school etc. A few adaptations and adjustments and it was fine. He might change his mind abthe wheelchair, many stores provide them free and shopping centres often have free mobility scooters. Otherwise he will have nice strong arms and one strong leg!

Thistlebelle · 14/03/2018 17:43

He needs to get crutches. If for some reason those aren’t possible then he needs a wheelchair.

You can’t kill yourself hauling him around. It’s not fair.

GlitterGlue · 14/03/2018 17:50

You'll have to ask for an OT assessment before he comes home so you can borrow equipment to make life easier. For example a frame for the loo and raised loo seat.

Motoko · 14/03/2018 18:04

You could do him a flask of tea or coffee and leave a sandwich and snacks, in a cool bag by the sofa when you're out of the house. Also, make sure he's got everything he needs within reach.

AnyFucker · 14/03/2018 18:05

If he is normally moderately active he doesn't need any special equipment or adaptations for the home.

Bloody hell, the expectations of some folk !

Hopping around on crutches for a few weeks is inconvenient, not the end of life as you know it

Whenwillth1send · 14/03/2018 18:44

I'm sure he will soon change his mind about needing a wheelchair. Be sure to set boundaries before the surgery to stop you turning into Nursey!

Blackteadrinker77 · 14/03/2018 18:53

A wheeled computer chair was our saviour when my husband was non weight bearing.
He pushed himself around the bottom floor of the house and used a grabber to reach things.

Like you the worry before hand was the worst part.

GlitterGlue · 14/03/2018 19:10

It really depends on the knee brace and how imobilised his leg will be. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask what might make life easier. He's not asking for a grape peeling assistant, but being able to get off the loo independently (hard if you can't bend your knee) or buying/borrowing a perching stool for the kitchen so he can make himself a sandwich would be helpful.

Original poster
Chickenlicken15 · 14/03/2018 19:30

Thank you for your helpful suggestions especially the rucksack

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/03/2018 22:31

After a week or so he should be absolutely fine on crutches

You are missing the point, he has been told no weight bearing on that leg for 6 weeks.

This means some serious knee surgery.

Hope all goes well, OP!

Eltonjohnssyrup · 14/03/2018 23:00

How are you financially? If you’re comfortable could you hire in some care help?

hilzilla · 14/03/2018 23:43

I found this invaluable when I was on crutches and non weight bearing

NRS Healthcare Super Grip Handle - No fixings needed https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A7WYQ8S?ref=yopoppmaswf

Aquamarine1029 · 15/03/2018 00:52

Get him crutches and while you should help him to a point, don't baby him. This too shall pass. You'll get through it!

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