Ive come to the conclusion that people in this profession are winging it.

[ihatethecold]

Mental health workers, especially people involved in any way, shape or form with helping children/ teens with MH issues.
It's an absolute travesty.
Right across the board I am shocked at how they really don't seem to know how to help young people.

Gp services that don't have a clue so won't prescribe anything and just refer you to a service that is so overstretched your child has to be practically dying before they will help them.
They genuinely don't know how to help.

Camhs, so underfunded that you wait absolutely ages just to get an assessment, to be told they will treat your child but the waiting list is a year long. They will refer you to a psychiatrist but that takes weeks. then they forget to put the referral in!

Private therapy, now this really is a shocker. You would think if you are paying (and this really isn't cheap) you would be seen by a professional that has some solid ideas of how to treat MH issues.
Its so wishy washy. I've never felt so ripped of in my life.

Counsellors with their own agenda. Took us 6 months to realise this.

School support workers. They deal with school kids that need support because of all sorts of needs. Lovely people but they really don't get MH.

One family support worker linked to the school said that self harming was ok and children need to do it to relieve their stress. How the hell is that right?

After 18 months of trying to get help for my DD14 I have come to the conclusion that they are winging it. No one seems to have any solid ideas that will help her manage her problems

Unfortunately Ive become an expert in severe anxiety in teenagers. Ive had to so I can support her.

Its just so depressing seeing how bad the services are.

I dont want or mean to offend anyone in this line of work but it just seems to be endemic that no one really has a clue.

I think it's interesting that you seem to have seen several professionals (GP, CAMHS clinicians, private therapist, counsellor, support worker etc) who apparently haven't had the first clue about mental health despite their training and years of experience but declare yourself an "expert

Not half as interesting as the professionals who meet your child for 30 mins (if at all) and think they're an expert on their individual needs.

You're having a hard time, but being rude about the people trying their best to help isn't gonna make a blind bit of difference.

What do you mean by ‘her own agenda’? There are a lot of people on MN maybe we could unpick this a little and make some suggestions? Not saying it’ll necessarily help but maybe you won’t feel so alone in it all.

Hello,

Both my children have MH issues and I had serious mental illness when I was a teenager/young woman. CAMHS are struggling and adult mental health services (who support my eldest son) are struggling. However, the struggle is not due to incompetent staff, but mainly to lack of resources and the very, very challenging nature of the work they do.

YellowFlower Some of them do have good intentions. But I do wonder at some of the lack of empathy I have experienced and witnessed in some of them. I think like with all professionals, there are good and bad. Not all of them are winging it- some are great but I do sometimes wonder if there is a conspiracy with them of trying to save NHS money by finding any excuse to not help patients.

Not half as interesting as those who meet your child for 30 mins and think they know it all

Yes to this. I think my issues with my last CPN was the fact that straight away she seemed to pre-judge me. My appearance is not typical due to some medical issues I have and she seemed to make some assumptions about me which were quite rude and hurtful.

Honestly my best tip about finding good counsellors and psychologists is to find your local Priory (as in The Priory that celebs, etc go to), find someone on their staff page you like the look of and then Google them to find their private practice details.

The Priory charge £5k per week so tend to pick pretty good staff and almost all of the psychologists and psychotherapists that work for them also have a private practice at much more normal rates.

Website: www.priorygroup.com/location-results?condition=f092dda8-e168-6d96-a5b4-ff00003e17fc

^This link should show you where they offer Young People's Therapy so click through to your closest one and see what staff they have that offer it and then Google them

Sorry, not sure if that will help but it's just something I thought could help from a practical point of view (if any are near you)

I am sorry for your bad experiences OP, I work in mental health and think the science of medication is very much trial and error, there’s no ‘one size fits all’ and unfortunately some people never find the right treatment, the government should be hanging their heads in shame at how under-resourced mental health services are and CAMHS is a travesty, it’s disgusting that a so-called developed country pays such little attention to such a desperate need

I know one parent who complains about CAHMS because actually she does not want to hear that what she does is making her DDs problems worse.

Nosey
She became quite judgemental about things my dd would tell her amongst other things.

She also told my dd (a 14 yr old anxious girl) that she brought a heavyness to the room whilst they were having a session.
That’s comment has stayed with my dd. She still asks why she said that.

We agreed to reduce the sessions to 45 mins because my dd was exhausted after struggling at school during the day.

The counsellor would then over run by 30 mins which really shows a lack of Boundaries.

The counsellor would talk incessantly during the session.

Wow. No a counsellor should not over run.

GPs are most certainly trained in mental health, it makes up a huge part of our workload and the vast majority of it is managed in primary care without referral but mainly in adults. Whilst mental health issues in children are becoming more common, they still aren't common. Mental health problems and prescribing in children is a really difficult area which needs expertise - someone who spends all day every day seeing children with these issues and prescribing appropriately. It's not a matter of reading a book or a guideline and learning it so you can do a better job, it's just not a safe thing to do- most ENT surgeons will have had training that involves general surgery, I still wouldn't want one removing my appendix, it needs someone who does it all the time.

OP I agree with you. And you're not being offensive or rude. You are calling a spade a spade.

I have been on a merry go round within NHS mental health services. Private therapists are not much better, have seen many over the years and wasted ££££££ on clueless incompetents.

We have private health insurance so I was able to see a psychiatrist at The Priory recently. What a revelation. She got it straightaway and understood my issues and recommended treatments that my GP will now have to follow through.

Her fee was £350 of which I paid £50, the rest covered by insurance. Even if I had had to pay £350 it would have been well worth it.

I agree, OP, up to a point. My experience of CAMHS has been good. We were referred when DS was 9 and we’ve been seen consistently since. We’ve trialled many drugs and had several rounds of CBT. However, we waited 18 months for therapy this year so, that reflects the cutting of services and resources. We are at the stage now where DS at 17, needs hospital inpatient treatment. There is no facility within 120 miles. At all.

We also had two utterly useless Support Workers. One of them recommended God and the solace to be found in religion and belonging to a church as a way for me to go and the other cane to my house and chuckled throughout our meetings, shaking his head and telling me there was nothing he could do because my son couldn’t access the activity based clubs he suggested.

Should also add, we have an excellent gp too. Whilst ds’s case and needs are very complex, my gp has tried his upmost to support us. Their hands are tied by cuts, lack of resources, staff shortages etc.

That’s a massive generalisation right there, OP, and thankfully not at all true in my experience.

I went from housebound and unable to work for years to holding down a full time job in a matter of months with CBT on the NHS.

It absolutely changed my life around.

In my experience with CAMHS (two DC over the past 8 years), the hardest part of dealing with them is the incompetency of some staff - failure to refer onwards, poor record keeping, blatant lying about what they have or have not done, failure to communicate properly with families and other organisations. I'm not sure that can all be excused as being caused by a lack of funds.

Yes exactly this. Failing to return calls, sending letters because we'd missed appointments that had never been made, useless customer service.

Well, that's great for you WhatToDoAboutThis.
OP has had her own experience which is very different, I don't see that as a massive generalization, she feels let down.

My GP went against advice of school councillor and wouldn't refer us to CAMHS, went through a different agency who after waiting 3 weeks for a discussion referred us immediately to CAHMS. CAHMS promised 3/4 weeks face-to-face which has evolved to 8 weeks because of Easter? Didn't realise CAHMS took school holidays! GP has lost us a month, Easter holidays another. Fabulous. I am considering making a complaint at GP surgery because as far as I am concerned the GP did not understand the criteria for CAHMS therefore wrongly referred.

Oh and we have private health insurance but can not instigate anything without referral from NHS professional in this case CAHMS.

I don't see that as a massive generalization, she feels let down.

woodlands01 Regardless of the fact that OP feels let down, she still made a massive generalisation by saying it was a “travesty across the board”.

That simply isn’t true; so many people are helped and have their lives turned around.

Well while I wouldn’t agree that counsellors should never do xyz (as pp said). That’s clearly v poor. I do worry that I’m trying to earn a crust some people do take on work beyond their experience/training and once it’s started it’s hard to say ‘sorry I’ve taken ££££ off you and have found I’m not the right fut’ though they should!

Are there any specialist counselling services round you? Even if you’ve not been referred there as pp suggests about priory you could seek out someone who works their privately.

I can see the heaviness comment being meant as a reflective observation - trying to empathise with the discomfort your dd is feeling. But it was clearly v misjudged and that not then compensated for by explaining what she meant. An adult might have said ‘what do you mean by that?!’ But an anxious teen is v unlikely to.

In my experience with CAMHS (two DC over the past 8 years), the hardest part of dealing with them is the incompetency of some staff - failure to refer onwards, poor record keeping, blatant lying about what they have or have not done, failure to communicate properly with families and other organisations. I'm not sure that can all be excused as being caused by a lack of funds.

As with any organisation, there will be individuals who are incompetent- and clearly lying to patients/their parents about what they have done is not acceptable. However, when services are as short staffed as most CAMHS services are it is inevitable that errors will occur- it will take longer to get things done than expected/ideal/planned. Things will get missed/fall through the cracks because you can only juggle so many balls at once before you drop one. So yes, I actually think lack of resources (not just money- human resources, workers on the ground and admin staff etc) is a big part of the problem. Not that this helps you if you are the patient whose referral is missed, appointment delayed and so on.

I work in the NHS, though not in mental health services. I know when things haven't gone to plan, it is quite often during busy periods and very often when we've been particularly short staffed. You are so busy, things do get missed- that letter you meant to dictate, the message you were gong to pass on, the email you were going to send: it doesn't get done because you are being pulled in so many directions.

OP you are right. YOU are the expert here. On your own daughter and this situation.
You may need to arm yourself to be her main support. But you'll also need support yourself xxx.

Have been where you are now ..... there is light ahead. I promise xx

I agree with this, "
There's just no need for this. If the op and her child has run the gamut of mh resources and spat out the other end with no help I can see how she would feel this way. I don't see why she should have to tip-toe around fragile egos in saying as much.".

A few years back mental health services saved my life, I received good treatment, I have a long term condition and will need treatment for the rest of my life on and off. I have also had to deal with Camhs for one of my children. But the whole mental health system seems to be falling apart right now and just isn't working. I shouldn't have to prop up the fragile egos of the workers as well as this. Workers lying about having seen me or replying to my calls when I haven't spoken to them for months and they never get back to me. GPS that I go to in crisis and can't wait to get me out of their office and don't make eye contact or allow me to speak.

Some people really shouldn't work in this field. That's the truth.