Or have I inadvertently fused myself with a wild boar à la The Fly?

[Luckingfovely]

It can be the only explanation for the things that have suddenly, rudely and determinedly started sprouting near the corners of my mouth. They are certainly not human. These bristles have a diameter of about a millimetre. If I let them grow out I reckon I could paint walls with them. I know I had a lot of champagne on my 40th but you'd have thought I'd remember a boar.

Luckingfovely wear them with pride

TheMadd oooof! I'm going to need a lot of conditioner to achieve that

My ones like that grow out my chin. And they appear from no where! Check in the bathroom mirror in the morning - nothing. Check at lunchtime - 1cm thick black hair sprouting! One of the last ones looked like a dark luxurious eyelash, and I swear it left an open hole where it came out.

I have two of these.

One is very white. I try to tell myself it's because I'm naturally fair but most likely it's just grey. Grows in the corner of my mouth on the left hand side.

The other is black and is on the right hand side of my chin.

They come every other month, taking it in turns.

There's nothing there when I wake up but by the end of the day they're a good centimetre long.

I compare myself to Mr Tuminus.

I have a number of them.
The joy of finding one knowing that you will get to pull the bugger out with tweezers later.

I have one, very fair one, that emerges coyly from a freckle on my jawline. For what seems like ages it's dainty and short, and then all of a sudden my mother is drawing me aside and trying to set about me with her fifty-year-old tweezers...

Apart from that, the most mysterious hair is the one I occasionally find growing on the back of my knee. I swear to God I shave carefully and yet every few months there's a dark hair about an inch long mocking me.

Oh yes.

I had to remove my emerging spider leg that inhabits my right lower jaw.

I can feel it's appearance building and then it starts feeling its way into the world.

God Mother the spider leg analogy made me dry heave!!

I don't know whether to collapse in despair at my bristly future or delight in the excellent company I am in!

Got me some doozers. They like it on my chin so much they brought mates to enjoy the fun.

I have started cryptically marking on my wall calendar when I pull them. Capital V equals my chin (which in RL isn't this shape, more pudding shaped) then a capital i underneath but to the right, left or middle to indicate area of bristle. When I started this they appeared every 8 weeks or so, now it is every week.....they know don't they? They know I am watching them....

Anyone else got cryptic symbols on their work wall planner? Are my workmates on MN and going to be sniggering at me now?

Strokes chin and ponders.....