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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sharing Housework Issues

26 replies

CarolsSecretCookieRecipe · 10/03/2018 04:31

I’m just after some perspective/advice on this problem please, as I just can’t seem to find a way to solve it.

DH works fulltime, 5 full days a week; I work part-time, five mornings a week. 2 teenaged DC. I do 95% of all household chores. I have tried repeatedly to get DH and DCs involved, asking, nagging, drawing up chore rosters, etc, etc, etc, and nothing sticks. They’ll do things for a day or so, then slack off and eventually stop. Unless I CONSTANTLY nag and follow them all around asking them to do their chores, it doesn’t happen. It’s easier and less exhausting to do everything myself.

Things came to a head yesterday. DH had completed an extra long work day - left at 5am, back at 4:30pm, and the day included long distance driving. I did my morning shift at work, then took our son to a medical appointment and did the food shopping. Both DH and I arrived home at the same time. DH immediately heads off to his study to watch TV, and I set to with preparing dinner and putting a load of washing on. I felt really tired and fed up and all the built-up feelings of resentment just burst out and I really lost it at DH.

He basically doesn’t think he should have to do any chores whatsoever after a long day at work.

I just wondered if anyone has found a magical way of getting other family members to pull their weight, or should I just press on with things as they are, or do I actually leave DH? Am I being unreasonable expecting him to contribute after a full working day?

Thank you for reading, and sorry it’s a mundane and boring problem.

OP posts:
AngelsSins · 10/03/2018 15:08

If you left him, would he never cook then? Just starve to death? Never wear clean clothes? Neglect his children? Working full time doesn't come with a free skivvy. I work full time, I don't have anyone running around after me and I cope.

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