Recently, my son(22) got engaged to his boyfriend of just over two years. But I'm not happy like I thought I would be the first time one of my children got engaged. I can't describe his fiance as anything other than a twat. Despite my son repeatedly saying they are in love and his fiance is the best thing in his life, his fiance is controlling, abusive and manipulative but my son cannot see it.
Last year, my son turned up at my house unannounced, which never happens and hasn't happened since, and said that he wanted to talk. He said that he was sorry he never answered my texts or calls and that his boyfriend had told him he didn't need me anymore because he had him. He said he was too scared to tell his boyfriend he wanted to see me as at Christmas(2016) he asked to spend it with me and his boyfriend had had started shouting at him and my son refused to talk anymore about that. His now-fiance is manipulative and I'm fairly sure adulterous. He has only been in contact a few times with me since then and with his brother and old friends even less. I didn't and still don't know how to help him get out of his clearly manipulative relationship.
Now they're engaged and my son didn't even tell me (my other son told me, who found out from my sons social media). We always had a great relationship and the fiance has destroyed it. After calling my son, I found out they are planning on getting married somewhere secluded with no guests. I know it's their choice but it screams controlling behaviour to me.
I don't know how to help and I don't know what to do.