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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu - neighbour tv

49 replies

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 03:03

Need some advice -

Live in a semi. Thought woman next door was lovely, been here for five years. For past two weeks neighbours tv has been very loud, often on until 2am. It echoes throughout the house late at night.

Husband last week politely asked if she would mind turning it down. Mentioned we’ve been neighbours for long enough, get on well and would she mind. All went well and we thought great. That evening it was the loudest it has ever been.

Tonight at 00:15 I had enough. Went to door. Asked very nicely for her to turn tv down and she blew her top. Apparently this is all in my head. In the end I had no choice but to call police :(

Police requested she turn it down. They left and tv went on louder. At 01:00 I called police back, no sign of them at 02:00 and then the tv went off so cancelled call out.

I am really upset. I feel my home has been ruined. Never would I ever imagined having to call police. Whilst we have children, our house is very quiet after 20:30 with husband wearing earphones to watch tv to avoid the kids waking up.

Any advice on how to handle this would be welcomed. Even the police are being ignored. We are both home owners. She is very unapproachable. She did mention she has recently moved the TV.

We are looking to move at the end of the year, it’s only March now and not in a financial position at moment.

OP posts:

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 06:12

Around here the council noise team only work weekends and advise call 101.

I’m just a little unsure whether just to keep calling when her tv is echoing throughout my house in an effort to try and get her to turn it down

OP posts:

RhinoGirl · 07/03/2018 06:20

Sorry but to the the posters who said it could be due to the OP getting up at 5.30am with the kids, I don’t agree. She would have to make an extreme amount of noise at that time and with a family who works and kids to get to school, early starts are inevitable.
It says a lot that she is deliberately turning it up at 8.30 when OPs house has started to wind down and become quieter for the evening. NDN shouldn’t have that reason to be turning the TV up to ridiculous volumes at that time

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 06:22

Rhino- that is exactly our thinking. I’ll get ear plugs, even move into conservatory to secure some sleep but do I let it continue or just keep getting police at the door? Argh, I love this house, this blooming tv nonsense is a joke

OP posts:

frumpety · 07/03/2018 06:37

Instead of her mental health , is it perhaps her hearing that is declining ? Especially when the police agreed that it was too loud ? DH had some hearing loss as a side effect of taking Ibuprofen and he used to have the TV on way too loud for my liking .

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 06:41

Possibly frumpety- she has a bad back hence why she sleeps in extension as it’s on her ground floor, you could be on to something there! I hope someone points it out to her soon

OP posts:

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 06:42

It’s so sad, gone from a really nice chilled out neighbour whom I’ve had endless chats with over garden fence to this. I really thought we could have just said, would you mind turning it down a little during the night. Never in my life have I called the police on anyone

OP posts:

bettinasofine · 07/03/2018 11:22

otter

I don't think the OP said she was mental....just that she thought her mental health might be in decline. Nowt wrong with saying that.

Is being inclined to think my neighbour was losing their marbles if they were blaring a tele at 2 in the morning when they'd previously been quiet

WunWegWunDarWun · 07/03/2018 11:26

I think you'd be very lucky if the police keep coming out for this.

ThisLittleKitty · 07/03/2018 11:28

You called the police because someone's TV was too loud? Unbelievable. The police are for emergencies, surprised they would even entertain this. Next time call the council not the police.

WonderLime · 07/03/2018 11:31

Just to play Devil's Advocate here - is it possible it's not as loud as it seems and the walls are readily thin?

We had a problem in our old home where the neighbours banged on the wall if we had the TV on in the evening - but we only had it on 10/100. I could also hear them opening cupboard drawers so we realised the walls were paper thin.

The other thing is her hearing may be declining - couple that with the fact that a lot of shows have really loud music but the speech is much quieter so would need to have it at a higher volume to pick up everything.

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 11:41

Little kitty - read above, that’s the way it works here.

OP posts:

GrowThroughWhatYouGoThrough · 07/03/2018 11:48

Is it possible her ears are blocked and she can't hear how loud the telly is? Is there any family she has I.e daughter/son you could have a word with and share your concerns?

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 13:52

Hearing could well be becoming an issue. There is a young adult son, very polite and well brought up.

I have spoken to council. When the team next on shift they are coming round to hear for themselves so that they can then approach her without it turning into tit for tat. In the meantime I am to continue calling police who if have the capacity, will come back. Council think maybe something has changed with her such as illness. They will use the visit they will make to establish this and offer support if required.

Thanks so much everyone for your help! I will update as I am sure I won’t be the last with such an issue.

OP posts:

Whitecurrants · 07/03/2018 14:00

With the greatest of respect OP, you sound as though you might be very noise sensitive. I don't know many families who think they need to wear headphones at night to avoid the TV waking the children. I'm not suggesting the problem is just that but maybe worth bearing in mind?

Confusedbeetle · 07/03/2018 14:04

If you are thinking of moving house be very careful how you handle this one. On the forms for fixtures and fittings there is a question asking if you have ever complained to the council about a neighbour dispute. Of course this can put people off so you have to be sure it is resolved. Environmental health will do noise monitoring, you are already involving the police so the house may become unsellable

Nocabbageinmyeye · 07/03/2018 14:06

I was actually just going to post what Whitecurrants did. Wearing headphones to watch TV in your own house so you don't wake your kids is not normal, are you sure your not overly sensitive about noise?

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 14:36

Whitecurrants/nocabbegeinmyeye - lol, it’s my husband not me! He likes a loud tv, if he didn’t wear them the neighbours would complain 😵

On a serious note, the noise from next door is not an overreaction. It’s out of order and echoing throughout the house all through the night

OP posts:

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 14:38

Thanks confusedbeetle - I must check that out.

Everyone keep your fingers crossed that next door have simmered down and considered - it’s going to go either way - extreme noise tonight or back to normal

OP posts:

Zaphodsotherhead · 07/03/2018 14:39

Can you record each instance of TV noise with a datestamp? That way the council officials/police can see that it's an ongoing issue even if they don't turn out for each occasion.

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 14:42

An app was suggested, so will check it out for that purpose!

OP posts:

Nesssie · 07/03/2018 14:47

The council have a duty to investigate, but they may have suggested the police as it was a weekend and they couldn't do anything at that time.
It would be investigated as a statutory noise nuisance that could lead to an abatement notice being served.
The council may have some noise monitoring equipment they can install if they are not able to come out and witness a noise at that time.
Either way the threat of a council investigation may be enough to put an end to this.

Also confusedbeetle is right, neighbourly disputes do have to be declared when selling the house, but on the other hand, under data protection laws all complaints are kept anonymous so unsure how they would check that.

sunshine99789 · 07/03/2018 14:50

Just to say OP, you aren't alone, my DH wears headphones for the tv/computer when I go to bed as I am a very light sleeper and it's a habit he has gotten into since we had DC and just continued with.

In regards to your neighbour, if you had previously gotten on well, maybe just attempt a conversation and say how sad you are that the relationship you had is breaking down and you don't want any hard feelings between the both of you. Invite her into your house while her TV is on so she can see for herself - although I'm aware that may not be a great plan if her hearing is failing:(

It all just seems so sad if you previously got on :(

PoisonousSmurf · 07/03/2018 14:58

You need this OP!

www.tvbgone.com/

Original poster

Baubles22 · 07/03/2018 15:39

That remote thing would do the trick!

Going to go home with a positive outlook. I hope to get this resolved without any further third party assistance. I will also do my bit with the ear plugs (as maybe I am noise sensitive)

I am a little concerned for her welfare as it has been quite unlike her but given she totally lost it at me I don’t think I’ll be making that approach any time soon

OP posts:

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