Sitting next to a smoker at work

[dontforgetto]

I am six months pregnant, work in central London in an open plan office environment and live in suburbs.

This week a new colleague has joined the team and sits on the same ‘bank’ of desks, directly next to me, which means he’s sat less than two feet from me. Nice guy, but it has quickly become apparent that he is a smoker.

As a new starter he is likely very conscious of not wanting to take cigarette breaks outside of lunch or before and after work. However, I’m sure once he feels more settled, the frequency will increase.

No one else in our team/immediate office area smokes, but there are smokers elsewhere in the large open plan office.

Now to my AIBU. AIBU to be considering asking to move desks?

I hate the smell of third hand cigarette smoke. It is unpleasant at the best of times, but my sense of smell is also heightened being pregnant. Then there is the research about third hand smoke exposure by pregnant women increasing incidence of asthma in unborn babies (I imagine London’s poor air quality is just as much, if not more of a risk factor though).

I don’t want to be precious about this, but I also don’t want to spend my entire work day in an uncomfortable and higher risk environment for my baby. I also don’t think it would be fair for someone else in the team to be moved into my seat so perhaps I should ask to move to another area of the office entirely?

My next maternity workplace risk assessment is next week so would be a good opportunity to discuss with HR, who I am sure would handle my request sensitively without causing embarrassment to the new colleague.

So I guess this is an AIBU and also a WWYD? Has anyone had a similar experience?

"Thirdhand smoke is aged secondhand smoke, and it attaches to the surfaces in homes and other surroundings. It is composed of smaller, ultrafine particles with a greater molecular weight that pose a greater asthma hazard than firsthand or secondhand smoke."

That's interesting because I have always found smelling stale smoke on people gives me slight breathing difficulties in a way that actually breathing in smoke doesn't.

YADNBU too. I had uber pregnancy dog nose and worked in a small cubicle area (and unable to move) with a smoker during my first pregnancy and would spend half the time gagging. It was so bad that in the end he agreed not to take fag breaks and only have a smoke at lunch which helped but it was still debilitating. I had to hold my breath everytime I walked passed him because that stale smell would set a gagging fit off.

My boss would try and rota us on opposite shifts but it wasn't always possible. I felt bad because he was a nice guy but you can't switch these physical responses off, much as you might want to and smoking is not a human right.

I think it would be fine to ask to move desks as the smell makes you want to retch, and your sense of smell is heightened because of your pregnancy. I think it might be a bit much to ask to move due to the risk of third hand smoke harming your baby, especially since you say you are in London with a fair amount of air pollution anyway.

Take your research into work and ask to be moved.
I'm a smoker btw, but you shouldn't have to work where you aren't comfortable pregnant or not.

I wonder how HR would handle a request from someone who wasn't pregnant

They couldn't do anything else other than treat them the same.
Otherwise they'd be making a rule for one and not another.
Somebody else may actually have Asthma and the third hand smoke affect them.

I think the risk of damage to your unborn baby's lungs from the smell on his clothes is very, very, very minimal.

However, if the smell is making you sick then you could ask to move, just find a different excuse than saying 'he stinks' 😁

To clarify on the third hand smoke:

It is an issue but probably not in this context. If he smoked in the office there would be residue on your chair/clothes etc and yes, that’s s potential risk. As he smokes outdoors, the residue is confined to him - you can smell it when he comes in but unless you’re in physical contact with his clothes then you’re not exposed. If for example he was a family member smoking outdoors, coming in and then in physical contact with you (holding the baby etc) then you’d be exposed, but your exposure in this situation is minimal

Anyway - the smell alone is pretty grim, and I have loathed sitting next to smokers. I think you’d be within your rights to ask to move purely on the smell basis, I wouldn’t mention third hand smoke because they can easily argue against that

@GreenMeerkat ha ha! Yes, need to approach situation with tact!

@ReginaldMolehusband I wasn't planning to cite the research anyway, just mentioned I'd heard of a risk involved (and did wonder if that should even be a consideration due to London's poor air quality). I now see third hand smoke is quite a controversial topic online! I'm not interested in getting involved in that argument.

dontforgetto No problem, the third hand smoke myth is a kite that tobacco control persist in trying to fly but it's so preposterous that even they can't get it to stick.
Always interests me that people acknowledge the risks that air pollution poses but no one has come up with a third hand air pollution myth yet. There's residue on clothes etc. that are apparently of no concern but when it comes to tobacco smoke any lie goes.

I think if you say it’s becuase you fear that the smell will give your baby asthma you will look ridiculous. Say it’s becuase the smell triggers your sickness, that will be fine.

To be contaminated with third hand smoke the item needs to be exposed to the smoke itself

It is a real concern for people who live with smokers who smoke in the house - for example cats of in house smokers lick contaminants off their fur and have increased rates of some cancers.
It’s not an issue here for you as he is not physically smoking in your environment. The smell is unpleasant but it’s not a risk to your health.

Actually Reginald there are cases - many miners wives developed coal related illnesses from residue on their husband’s/sons clothes that they washed. There are also plenty of mesothelioma cases in women who washed exposed workers clothing too. I suspect it will depend on the specific pollutants involved - something like NO2 for example may not be such an issue, but some particulates might be.

Smokers should stigmatized, It's a foul habit that is heaped on others and not just the smoker @Reginald

As a new starter he is likely very conscious of not wanting to take cigarette breaks outside of lunch or before and after work. However, I’m sure once he feels more settled, the frequency will increase.

Massive projection there.

GreenSeededGrape Change that from Smokers to Smoking and you'd perhaps have a point, otherwise you may appear to some to be a sanctimonious judgemental twat.

I sit next to a heavy smoker at work he's about 3 to 4 feet away most of the time But...

He also is a complete slob, there's often a combination smell emanating from him of BO, urine, ciggerettes, and something kind of sour smell as well. He's also the main suspect of being the one who urinates all over the toilets and floor of bathrooms as well as leaving shit marks on the seat. But I digress...

There's not actually another place I can be moved to where there isn't another smoker unfortunately, I'm just really lucky that my sense of smell has barely increased with pregnancy and I haven't had morning sickness or I'd likely be hurling in my desk bin all day.

I religiously wash my hands on all breaks and at lunch, use antibacterial wipes every time I sit down at desk before putting on my disposable nitrile gloves to work. While it's not required to wear gloves for my job it's also not abnormal to do so given what we handle at work being unpredictable, 5 of our 17 person team wear gloves daily. So I have the perfect excuse to wear them.

I would ask to move. I can't bear the smell either.

I'm not sure they actually have to act on your request though.

This must be horrible for you OP, as an ex very light smoker if I so much as walk past someone in the street who has been smoking my stomach churns. I was never ever sensitive to the smell, I don't think I noticed it when I smoked, so I don't want to be a hypocrite. I agree it does need tact, I would never want to hurt someone over it but I think you need to think of yourself too. Good luck.

yeah because a cigarette not lit by a smoker is terrible

I maybe a 'judgmental twat' but better than a smelly selfish fucking smoker twat.

Yanbu. I worked in one place where a chap with horrendous BO was asked to improve his personal hygiene/change his clothes more regularly due to complaints from colleagues about the stench, and smokers had to stand way away from the doorway and keep their coats separate from everyone else's.

Stinking colleagues are always awkward.

Aaaargh nothing worse than stale smoke. A friend of mine smokes and the stale smell gives me the rage.

@NewYearNewMe18 what would I possibly be projecting? I might be making an assumption, sure, but I'm not projecting anything.

I don't think it's a massive assumption though. In our office everyone manages their own time, can go for lunch when they choose, while smokers similarly pop out as and when they wish. It is rare for someone to start and take regular smoke breaks unless a team colleague is a smoker and invites them to join. It is usual that as a new starter settles in a role, they develop the confidence to take lunch and any other breaks as and when they like.

I'm not saying he definitely will smoke more frequently, but I can imagine he might.