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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feel guilty clearing out toys

15 replies

Mammalamb · 06/03/2018 15:45

My son has loads of toys. Most of which he never plays with. My husband and mum keep nagging me to get rid of some of them. I’ve packed a few bags of toys that he never plays with and arranged for someone to collect them for them to go to teenagers with severe learning difficulties. But now, I feel really guilty giving my sons stuff away (they were charity shop buys, he never plays with them, but as he is only 2 he can’t give them away of his own free will). Please tell me I’m being ridiculous

OP posts:
Peachyking000 · 06/03/2018 15:52

He might play with them when he is older? Is you keeping them going to cause problems for your DH or DM eg storage issues? If not, I wouldn’t be rushing to get rid of them

Original poster
Mammalamb · 06/03/2018 16:13

He’s got a large playroom but it’s still full of toys (and not much room for any more) My husband thinks I’m a hoarder (my mum is quite a minimalist so that’s not a surprise that she thinks it’s bonkers that he has so many toys)

OP posts:
DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 06/03/2018 16:24

The only time I feel guilty is when it’s a gift that the kid hasn’t used. Then I feel bad that someone has spent time and money picking out something they thing my child will like and my child isn’t arsed.

Otherwise - never feel guilty!

Put stuff in a bin bag and away in the loft or somewhere not easy to get to, if the toy isn’t missed after a few months or year then get rid. Be ruthless or you’ll be overrun by the time he’s at school and getting birthday presents from friends as well as family.

DalekDalekDalek · 06/03/2018 16:25

He's two. If he doesn't play with them he won't even notice them missing.

Justmuddlingalong · 06/03/2018 16:29

You will be drowning in stuff if you don't have a cull every now and then.

TwitterQueen1 · 06/03/2018 16:30

Be very, very careful OP. I gave away my DD's giraffe that I thought she didn't want any more. She has NEVER forgiven me. Sad However, since your DS is only 2 you're probably OK.....

And actually I regret giving away hippo, which my DD doesn't remember but I do.

sparklepops123 · 06/03/2018 16:31

Think about the people you are donating them to and how much pleasure they will gain from them, much better than them left in a room unused.

Original poster
Mammalamb · 06/03/2018 20:05

Sparkles; that’s true. I actually don’t think he has touched any of these toys in the past few months. Just feel guilty as they aren’t mine to give away.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 06/03/2018 20:08

Rotating them can work better. I do think they get totally overloaded when they have lots of toys in a space. Get some big plastic storage boxes and put everything in there, place in your bedroom/living room/storage/spare room, then give him a nice small but accessible shelf in his room and put say five things in there. Wait and watch. When he starts to get bored of those toys or after you get bored, take them out and replace with 5 new ones from the boxes.

You'll find out what he plays with and what he doesn't this way. It might not always be what you expect either. I found DS was far more interested in a toy when he hadn't seen it for a while.

BertieBotts · 06/03/2018 20:09

And by this I mean, you'll note what to take out of rotation and donate.

You can always keep a few special favourites for memory's sake :)

LittleMyLikesSnuffkin · 06/03/2018 20:14

He’s 2 and already has so many toys you’ve had a clear out and he still has a room full. Don’t feel guilty, you’re giving them to people who will definitely appreciate them in a way your son currently doesn’t.

FWIW I do this too sometimes. There’s about 8 bags of toys, books and clothes to go to be taken to a women’s refuge in my hall later this week. Don’t feel the least bit guilty.

falang · 06/03/2018 20:24

You're being very very ridiculous.

LannieDuck · 06/03/2018 20:26

I find it really difficult as well. Much harder than clearing out my own things.

LetsGoBitches · 06/03/2018 20:37

@Mamalamb are you expecting more kids or grieving that you won’t have any more?
Fwiw I found it difficult to clear out any baby things untill I was sure I had finished my family.

Go easy on yourself and ask a friend to help you in your mission to have more room to play in for your son!

melj1213 · 06/03/2018 20:49

If, at the age of 2, you already have an overflowing playroom then YABU to not want to give away things that your child shows no interest in when they could be going to people who will appreciate/enjoy them.

Don't see it as getting rid of your child's toys see it as clearing space of things he doesn't use to a) allow him to really enjoy the toys he does love and play with by takjng away things that are just cluttering his play space and b) allow those toys to go to someone who would genuinely love, cherish and play with them as they are intended.

If you really aren't ready to part with things then do some toy rotation or put stuff away and if he hasn't asked about them or wanted to play with them after a certain amount of time, then donate them.

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