I don't know what to do

[frilla]

Name changed for this because.. well it's embarrassing.

I don't really know where to start, my thoughts are all a bit jumbled in my head but I'll try and explain the best I can (this will probably be long).

A few years ago now, I was just on WhatsApp and I noticed my mums display picture was basically a dick pic. I don't know whose picture it was. I was still living at home so I went into to see her and said she might wanna change that... she did. Seemed embarrassed about it, and said she'd accidentally made it her picture when her friend sent her it. I didn't really believe her but I left it. She told me to not tell my dad because he would be upset if he knew. I thought that was odd, because if it happened to me and my boyfriend, we'd have a laugh about it.

Anyway, a few weeks later I read (over her shoulder) that she was sending really really explicit messages on words with friends. Messages you'd defo not want to even think about your mum at all. They were to my dads best friend. I didn't say anything, as I didn't know what to do. But I was disgusted.

I casually brought up in conversation how I thought that sexting and the like was cheating - my dad agreed, had a chat about it just general chit chat. Thought it would maybe make my mum reconsider.

As far as I'm aware, there's been nothing since.

Today, she gave me her tablet to 'fix' (something about the volume). As I've gone to open it, it's opened on the words with friends app. She's sending horrible messages again. To some man I don't know. Ive no idea who he is. They're horrible.

My dad would be absolutely heartbroken, he loves my mum to bits. I don't know what I should do, if I should do anything?

I've posted here for traffic really. But AIBU to say anything?

That's a tough one, I mean if I was your dad I'd want to know but some couples are odd, in that he might already have some idea but doesn't want to know? What do you think?

Seems a bit foolish of her to not cover her tracks.

I think I would give her an ultimatum - she stops sending these messages or you tell your dad.

I would have to call her out on it - their marriage is their business but your relationship with her is going to suffer when you know such info. And you have to face your df too.....

I can't say for certain, but I don't think my dad knows about it - it's difficult to ask him without telling him about it!

I already have a very very rocky relationship with my mum. We don't get on very well at all... I just don't know what to do

Tricky situation as it could open a can of worms that could end up causing your parents to break up, or your dad to be really upset.
Could she maybe be doing it as a boredom thing as she enjoys the attention it brings her from other men? Maybe her and your dad aren’t intimate together anymore.
But regardless - if it were me I probably wouldn’t say anything to my dad but would have a stern word with my mum about how horrible her behaviour is

Mind your own business and stop reading people's messages

Sounds a bit harsh,but if you don't get on with your mum anyway,could your judgment be clouded? I'm guessing your dad already knows about it,and doesn't seem too bothered. You can persevere,or just ignore it...your parents don't seem bothered,,so

Difficult to not read a message when it's been handed to you. Also difficult to 'mind your own business' when you know its going to hurt someone you love. I wouldnt say anything to your Dad, but maybe a word with your Mum?