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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder what's wrong with me?

1 reply

unsureofanything · 04/03/2018 21:13

I have NC as potentially outing.

Don't know where to start really... I just don't know what is wrong with me. I have a really kind DP and beautiful 8monfh DS. DP and I had only been together a short while before DS came along but he's so loved and we have a great lifestyle and lovely home-work balance...But I'm not happy.

I've had 4 serious relationships before DP and after a certain amount of time have gotten bored and broke it off. Last relationship was 3 and a half years, discussed marriage and kids etc, then I realised I didn't love him and we broke up. Same with all my relationships. Met DP and it was amazing and knew I loved him, had great sex life and had loads of fun. We've been together a few years and I just don't fancy him anymore. I don't fancy anyone else either! I do wonder if I'm asexual, but crave attention/affection so have always gone into relationships but would this explain enjoying sex at the beginning? Or I wonder if I could be gay? I find women attractive from an outside perspective but couldn't imagine being with one.

I just.. I don't know what to do. I care deeply about my partner but part of me wants to be alone with my son. I'm not even 30 yet so I worry about "wasting" my life with someone Im not in love with. We are happy, and comfortable, I won't be miserable. And I worry if I leave I'll just stay in this cycle forever.

Please be gentle with me I come from from a family that were v emotionally abusive and I have a history of depression. I'm so confused sorry if this does not make a whole lot of sense.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 04/03/2018 21:19

Do you think it's possible that you put up a wall in a subconscious attempt to protect yourself from being hurt if your partner(s) decided to leave you? If you break up with them first, you won't be vulnerable.

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