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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not mention that I am pregnant?

32 replies

Seabiscuit1 · 04/03/2018 13:44

DP and I have found a house that we love and want to start the rental application for. It’s great. 20 mins from my parents (we currently live 2 hours away from family) it has 3 bedrooms, a garden and in a village that I love.
Called the letting agent to express our interest after going to see it. He told me that the first stage was to write a paragraph or two about ourselves. All fine I think! We both have decent careers and I have ties to the village.
But I am 28 weeks pregnant. He probably would have noticed when we viewed the house but I was wearing a loose fitting dress so wouldn’t have been too obvious.
AIBU not to mention that I am pregnant when I write about us?! I am so scared that it will affect our chances of getting the house that I have fallen in love with.
Also, any idea about what we can say about ourselves other than our careers?

OP posts:
icklekid · 04/03/2018 13:46

I imagine a 3 bed house would normally be let to families so no idea why it would go against you but don't feel you have to mention it

IsDaveThere · 04/03/2018 13:47

That sounds really odd, I've never heard of having to write your life story down to be allowed to rent a property!

Anyway, no I wouldn't tell t hem that I am pregnant. None of their business.

mumda · 04/03/2018 13:47

"He told me that the first stage was to write a paragraph or two about ourselves"

Nooooooooooo.

"Janet and John want to rent this house. Janet and John have enough money every month to rent this house. Janet and John will live in this house whilst Janet and John rent it and then Janet and John will move out when we do not rent it anymore"

Done.
FFS. There are some mad letting agents.

NewYearNewMe18 · 04/03/2018 13:49

He told me that the first stage was to write a paragraph or two about ourselves.

Am I being obtuse? why would anyone need to know that your hobbies are origami and crochet? no ones ever going to put down they like swinging and snorting a line of recreational A class drugs on a Friday are they?

northerngoldilocks · 04/03/2018 13:52

I'm a landlord. My only real interests in tenants is whether they can pay the rent and that they're not going to start subletting so my home is an HMO. I would love a couple about to start a family as I'd be hoping they were looking for it to become their home and stay a long time. In my experience couples and families tend to look after properties more. To be honest, if they don't want kids in the property you're hardly going to be able to hide it long term.

Original poster
Seabiscuit1 · 04/03/2018 13:53

It does seem really quite strange! Surely all that matters is that we can afford the rent and that we aren’t having any wild parties. But have to do what they say I suppose!
I think I probably won’t mention it because I don’t think it is overly relevant. I know they neighbours and they certainly won’t object to the baby. One has already offered to babysit!

OP posts:
Glumglowworm · 04/03/2018 13:53

This is so weird!

The only time I’ve had to do more than say “yes I want it” and give references and details of income is for house sharing. If you’re going to be living with a stranger it’s reasonable to want to know a little about them. Not for normal rental though.

Makingworkwork · 04/03/2018 13:55

If that is the first stage what is the second stage?

AnnieAnoniMouse · 04/03/2018 13:58

Jesus wept, is this an actual ‘thing’ now?

We are probably going to have to rent our house out next year (due to work contract), personally I’d love to know that there was going to be a little baby living here. However, I guess some might wonder if you’ll be able to afford the rent & worry about soon having a toddler in the house. People are weird. I probably would err on the side of caution & not mention it.

I’d try to see if more than one agency was trying to find tenants for it.

I’d want to tell the agent to shove it, but if I really wanted the house I’d just write some tripe about jobs, proximity to parents, knowing & loving the village and other inconsequential shit you can think of...DH runs, I do Pilates, we both love the Sunday crossword. Whatever makes you sound like nice people and quiet, inoffensive, caring tenants.

If he brings your pregnancy up later just tell him that’s a private matter.

HootenannyHouse · 04/03/2018 13:58

I would check they take children as not all properties do.

Rosamund1 · 04/03/2018 13:59

Don’t tell them unless they ask. They may then start to be all like ‘well how’ll you pay rents?’. Whoever came up with this policy is a cf.

Justwaitingforaline · 04/03/2018 14:00

Making having tea with the landlord Grin

AnnieAnoniMouse · 04/03/2018 14:01

Actually, given you know the neighbours, why not get them to recommend you and possibly even avoid the agency altogether?

pinkdonkey · 04/03/2018 14:03

Our tenancy states we have to ask permission for any additional occupants so I did check with the estate agent regarding kids before starting TTC because I didn't want to find we had to suddenly move whilst heavily pregnant. They were a bit surprised to be asked and said of course it wasn't a problem, but some landlords do specify no kids so that's worth checking.

OlennasWimple · 04/03/2018 14:07

This is bonkers.

But as you say, if that's the process, that's the process.

I'd fudge it along the lines of "We are a [occupation] and [occupation] and have been looking for a property in X village as we have strong family connections to the area. We were pleased to find X property. We can afford the rent and look forward to making it our home."

ElsieMc · 04/03/2018 14:11

Are you about to rent no. 1 Folgate Street? (The Girl Before JP Delaney)

PinkyBlunder · 04/03/2018 14:20

He told me that the first stage was to write a paragraph or two about ourselves.

This would put me off. It suggests they’ll be picking and choosing tennants on more than whether you can pay the rent and have good references and that’s not on.

Every time we’ve rented a new house I was heavily pregnant and it’s never been a problem. If you’re unsure tell them, if they act like it’s a problem then it’s a huge red flag!

AlpacaLypse · 04/03/2018 14:21

Some houses do have a covenant attached, so they can only be rented to people with verifiable local connections. There's a close of them here. That's the only reason I can think of, and I would expect in that case the landlord to be either a charity or the local authority acting on their behalf.

Ofalltheginjoints · 04/03/2018 14:24

That is a bit strange from the letting agent, I wouldn’t have thought being pregnant would count against you for the property but your call as to whether to mention it or not.

Letting agents seem to be asking more and more from potential tenants, whilst I understand that they need to ensure people can afford the property they want to rent that seems intrusive, mind you the letting agent prior to the flat were in now had us in for a face to face interview in which he asked various questions about our relationship (is it serious etc....) and my disability (nothing to do with the property as it was ground floor) and then wanted to come and inspect my partner’s current flat despite having a reference from his landlord, good luck OP, hope you get the house

expatinscotland · 04/03/2018 14:25

Jesus wept, an audition to rent a fucking house! Don't tell them you're pregnant.

Original poster
Seabiscuit1 · 04/03/2018 14:31

I have to say I am panicking about it a bit! Definitely over thinking every single aspect. I was expecting to call up, provide references and pay the deposit.
It seems way over the top but will do what he says and charm them with our wonderfulness!
I’m a terrible one for getting my heart set on something and seeing no other path my life can take. I could imagine our little family here from before I even saw the house.

OP posts:
BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 04/03/2018 14:32

If that is the first stage what is the second stage?

Explaining what your job is (that will pay the rent) through the medium of interpretive dance?

rainbowlou · 04/03/2018 14:33

We had this happen to us, we felt like we were being Interviewed.
We then received an email to say after considering all candidates the landlord had chosen the couple that he felt suited the area best!!
Also we found that when looking at 3 bedroom rentals, a lot stated pets allowed but not children!

Original poster
Seabiscuit1 · 04/03/2018 14:34

ElsieMc you would think that! But no, just a nice but not particularly fancy family home.
We currently live an excessively grand town house with a far far higher rent the the whole process to rent it was so much easier!

OP posts:
SMarie123 · 04/03/2018 14:39

Can you ask the landlord to write a paragraph about him/ herself?